Dad Joke Examples

“Kamu brengsek! Aku membencimu seumur hidupku, kamu keterlaluan!” Calantha terkejut ketika mendapati dirinya terbangun tanpa sehelai benang di samping seorang pria yang tak lain adalah calon iparnya, Alessandro Javier alias Al. Sial, tragedi itu membuat perjodohan antara Al dan saudari kembarnya batal. Bahkan, bukannya membantu menjelaskan kesalahpahaman, Al menambah masalah semakin pelik. Hingga Calantha dan Al terikat pernikahan paksa. Calantha pikir, nasib buruk usai, ternyata dugaannya salah, masalah datang silih berganti. Selain itu ditemukan fakta-fakta baru, termasuk rahasia besar yang selama ini tersembunyi rapi.

Karena membutuhkan biaya yang banyak untuk perawatan adiknya. Natasya Grey terpaksa menjadi simpanan seorang duda tampan dan menjadi Sugar Daddy untuknya. Leonardo Stell. Namun apa jadinya jika ternyata Sugar Daddy-nya selama ini adalah ayah dari sahabatnya sendiri. Liora Stell. Liora yang tau jika ayahnya memiliki hubungan dengan sahabatnya sangat murka dan menginginkan mereka berpisah karena dia masih menginginkan ayahnya kembali bersatu dengan ibu kandungnya. Karena tidak ingin persahabatnya dengan Liora hancur, Natasya ingin meninggalkan Leon, namun saat dia ingin pergi, ternyata dia baru tau jika dirinya sedang hamil. Lalu apakah yang terjadi selanjutnya? Apakah Natasya bisa bersatu dengan Leon mengingat Liora tidak menyetujui hubungan mereka.

Kiara Giovanna tak menyangka, hidupnya bisa berubah 180 derajat. Karena kesalahan seorang pria, ia harus kehilangan ayah, dan juga menikah dengan pria yang telah menabrak ayahnya sendiri. Kehidupan pernikahan Kiara jalani tanpa adanya cinta dari suami. Namun siapa sangka, malam itu, pria lain menjerat Kiara dalam malam panas yang sangat menggairahkan. Dan pria itu adalah ayah mertuanya sendiri!

His cum dripped down my chin, mingling with my tears, a stark reminder of his dominance, his control. ***** I came to ruin my ex. I never meant to kneel for his father. I came back to ruin Caleb Vane. I had a plan that was cold, sharp, and merciless. But then I met Malric Vane. The man doesn’t flirt. He commands. One glance and my legs trembled. One word and I was on my knees. He’s the Lycan every wolf fears. The man no one touches. And now I wake up in his bed, spread wide, bite-marked, and dripping for more. He says I wasn’t born…I was made. Made to obey. Made to please him. And the worst part? He’s right. Because every time he calls me good girl, I forget my revenge. I just want to be ruined all over again.

"Spread your fucking legs for Daddy…" The moment those growled words hit my ears, my thighs trembled, going weak at the knees. I swallowed hard, my throat dry with envy, aching to be the one spread wide and commanded by that deep, dominant voice. Heat flooded my core, soaking my panties with slick arousal, my pussy clenching desperately around nothing. Like the foolish, needy girl I was, I nudged the door open just a crack, peeking into the dim light of his bedroom to see who he was claiming on that massive bed. But shock slammed into me—Alpha Kane wasn't with anyone else. He lounged against the headboard, his massive hand wrapped around his thick, veined cock, stroking it slow and firm while his piercing eyes locked on a spread of my photos scattered across the sheets. Pictures of me in innocent poses, but the way he pumped his shaft, pre-cum beading at the tip and dripping down his length, turned them filthy in his gaze. **** I'd been just ten when rogues tore through our pack in a brutal war, slaughtering my parents and leaving me orphaned in the blood-soaked ruins. Alpha Kane Laskovic had charged in like a storm, ripping through the attackers with savage fury, saving me and the survivors. He became my guardian, my armored knight, pulling me from the ashes and raising me under his powerful protection. I was supposed to call him Dad—respectful, safe. Not Daddy, not while fantasizing about him pinning me down, growling filthy commands as he fucked me raw, claiming every inch of my body as his. But gods, I couldn't stop. The taboo hunger burned too hot, making me crave his cum flooding my womb, marking me as his forbidden little slut.

Luna's world is falling apart. Kailangan ng kapatid niya ng kidney transplant, at naibenta na niya halos lahat para lang mailigtas ito. Wala na siyang matakbuhan. She's about to lose everything when something unexpected happens sa ospital. Napagkamalan siyang ina ng anak ng isang mafia lord, and just like that, everything changes. Doon niya nakilala si Theo Montelibano. Cold, commanding, and dangerously intense. May isang kondisyon lang ito—gusto niyang maging yaya si Luna ng anak niya. Kapalit nun, siya ang magbabayad para sa operasyon ng kapatid niya. Luna agrees, kahit hindi siya sigurado kung tama bang makisangkot sa isang lalaking kagaya nito. Habang tumatagal, unti-unting lumalambot ang puso ni Luna sa bata. Pero mas nakakagulat ang epekto ni Theo sa kanya. The more she gets to know him, the more she sees na may lalim ang taong ito. Behind the control and power, may taong sugatan, may taong may tinatago. What started as a deal slowly becomes something deeper. Pero sa mundong puno ng sikreto, panganib, at mga kalabang hindi mo alam kung saan nagtatago, falling in love is never safe. Caught between her painful past, her confusing present with Theo, and the feud na posibleng ikasira ng lahat, Luna has to make a choice. Lalaban ba siya para sa puso niya, o iiwan niya ang tanging pamilyang minahal siya?

Trigger Warnings: This is dark, not soft romance. Expect BDSM, breeding kink, power play, rough sex, omega submission, orgasm denial, impact play, primal rut/heat, age-gap obsession, violence, and depraved scenes. Read at your own risk. ~~~~~ I spent two years grooming myself into the perfect omega for the man who rejected me: the deadliest SSS+ Alpha alive. Marcus Kane—my father’s best friend, old enough to be my uncle—wants no children, but only a woman dark enough to take his brutality. So I became her. If he craves a throat that swallows his cock or cum without complaint, thighs that spread for his waist to occupy, or a body begging through pain and filth… I’ll give it all. But he still fucks other omegas. Never me. Then danger stalks us when my father’s research puts a target on our backs and shadowy enemies are looming, leaving Marcus as our only shield. I had to move into his penthouse. And now, I’m done waiting. I will have him. The Alpha who swore he would never claim me is ready to burn the world before anyone takes what is his—ME!

Hindi akalain ni Serena na ang simpleng pagtanggi niya na sapilitang maikasal sa kuya ng kanyang best friend ang magiging daan pala para maungkat ang isang rebelasyon tungkol sa pagkatao niya. Iyon din ang naging simula ng isang napakalaking pagbabago sa buhay niya. Mula sa pagiging tagapagmana ng mga Choi ay natagpuan niya na lang ang sarili niya na nasa isang napakahirap na kalagayan. Mula sa naglalakihan at mga bonggang runway platform na nilalakaran niya suot ang iba't-ibang designer items ay naroon siya ngayon sa isang maliit na entabladong nasa gitna ng madilim na club— sumasayaw ng malaswang sayaw habang suot ang maliliit na piraso ng tela na kaunti na lang ay maglalantad na sa kaluluwa niya. Mula sa tingin ng paghanga at sigaw ng admirasyon mula sa mga umiidolo sa kanya ay nauwi siya sa pagsalo ng mga malalagkit na tingin at mahahalay na salita mula sa mga lalaking hindi niya kilala na pawang mga hayok sa laman. Ang magandang katawan na dati niyang iniingat-ingatan, ngayon ay naging parausan na lang ng kung sino man ang may kakayahang magluwal ng pinakamalaking halaga para sa isang gabing impiyerno sa loob ng VIP room ng club. Paanong ang simpleng paghahangad ng kabutihan niya para sa sarili ay naging sanhi ng pagbaliktad ng mundo niya at pagkawala sa kanya ng mga taong mahalaga sa buhay niya? Ngunit sa kabila ng hirap at walang katiyakan ay pinili niya pa ring mabuhay. Kahit alang-alang na lang sa isisilang niyang anak sa lalaking nakasama niya sa isang gabing impiyerno na iyon. Sa lalaking hindi niya man lang nakikilala...

Niat hati dari kampung ke kota untuk mencari pekerjaan, namun Rosela menghadapi nasib buruk hingga bertemu Vadlan Atmajaya yang merupakan seorang CEO muda. Dan anehnya mengaku sebagai suaminya. "Kemana saja kamu selama ini? Ayo, cepat pulang!" Vadlan "Saya gak kenal siapa Om! Pasti Om salah orang." Rosela. Bagaimana Rosela menghadapi situasinya saat ini, ketika mendadak terjebak sebagai istri palsu dari Vadlan? 

"Crawl to Daddy on your hands and knees, little whore. I want to see you beg for this dick before I split you open and breed that dripping cunt." * Daddy's Naughty Pet is a collection for readers who are tired of vanilla bullshit and want stories about people who fuck like their lives depend on it. Five chapters each of the raunchiest, most depraved scenarios that'll make you wet, hard, and wondering what's wrong with you for loving it. The stepmom who "accidentally" walks in on her stepson jerking off and decides to help. The personal assistant who schedules "meetings" that are really just fuck sessions on the conference table. The priest who breaks his vows with a parishioner in the confessional. The doctor who gives very hands-on examinations. The landlord who demands payment in pussy. The mechanic who test-drives more than cars. The massage therapist with wandering hands. The yoga instructor who teaches flexible positions for other reasons. The lifeguard who performs mouth-to-mouth that turns into face-fucking. The uber driver who takes a detour. Every character is controlled by their cravings. The married woman sneaking out to get railed by her ex because her husband's dick doesn't satisfy. The college girl who fucks her entire fraternity in one night. The businessman who keeps a submissive locked in his penthouse. These stories don't have plot—they have positions. No character development—just hole development. No emotional connection—just physical fucking that leaves them sore, sticky, and immediately ready for round two. Expect: Every depraved kink you can imagine and some you didn't know existed. This collection is shameless, filthy, degenerate smut with zero redeeming qualities. And that's exactly why you'll devour every word. Ready! Now flip that page like the good little girl you are.