Dark Humor Dad Jokes Novels & Stories

I said grinning. " Shut up, Sid !! " Bhai said glaring at me and I laughed. " What is the surprise?? " Dad looked at him with amusement. " Dad, it is a surprise! " Sid said. " Have you found a new mom for yourself, who cooks amazing food? " He said and laughed at his own joke. My dad has always had a weird sense of humour... " Hey, dad... bingo !!! You are quite close. " I said. Dad choked on his food. Bhai shook my head and gave water to him. He drank and looked at us with shock.

My father loves to make bad jokes and thanks to him I live with my hair on end, but I still do the possible and the impossible because Yin and I are surrounded by love and peace. After getting me out of such a scare, his laughter was unbearable, he mocked my reaction to no avail, and to top it all off, his sound is contagious. —Dad, stop it, or we'll end up hanging around the floor. He took three deep breaths and after he calmed down he said.

my dad laughs as he takes my favorite mug down from the cabinet to give me my share of our morning coffee. I laugh. Dad takes the coffees to the table while I make our cereal. He smiles as he watches me before chuckling again. "I have to be the luckiest parent around. I hear horror story after horror story about cranky teenage daughters but then I hang out with mine. Are you an alien," dad asks laughing as I stick my tongue out at him. "Nope. I am just awesome. Mostly because of my awesome dad," I say passing him his share of coco puffs.

Dad cut the doctor off on time before the doc could start d*cking about complicated medical shit with terms we could not understand. “Try to save your breath, doctor coz we understand only English,” Dad grinned and the doctor rightfully turned beetroot red. “Spare us the scientific nonsense, ex lover. Don’t show everyone that show off is your middle name,” Mom exasperatedly said. Ex lover ? Woah !! No wonder Dad jokes about Doctor Anderus stabbing him on the examination table. Haha.

“What?” “Yes. It’s medically safe,” he says, a smile playing on his lips. I’m about to be sick when he bursts out laughing. “I can’t believe you fell for that. I only used herbs.” “So this is your best dad joke?” “Of course not. I have plenty more where that came from.” “I am not telling my children I peed on their injuries.” “That’s what they’ll have me for. Their grandfather.” “Believe me, there are already two people auditioning for that role. Marcus and Kai.”

I express amiably and knock on my dad's office door. “There's a little unhinged, and then there’s whatever that was. She went from zero to fruitcake in five seconds flat. And what was that laugh?” I burst into peals of laughter just as my dad calls for us to enter. “Ahh, if it isn’t the dynamic duo. Come on in, kids.” My dad beams, watching amusedly while we recover from our hysterics. “Now that’s what I like to see. Come with good news?” He questions, looking between us curiously and leaning forward in his chair.

There is a curl to his lip that has me suppressing a grin because I know what comes next. The rip-roaring tooter he’s been working on explodes through the quiet. As the too handsome Dad’s face goes red, and his head knocks back, I let out a deep belly laugh I couldn’t hold in if I wanted. I still go on feeding Mister Man as if the series of other squirting farts accompanied by his bouncing, filling the visible diaper in his pant line, aren’t happening. Well, as much as I can through the increasing laughs, that are bringing tears to my eyes. As much for the relief in the little one’s face as the mortification on Dad’s.

There was a sizzle in the background, and I realized my dad was making his usual eggs and bacon. “Lay off the bacon, Dad. I don’t want to get you out of trouble just to lose you to a heart attack,” I admonished him. My dad snorted. “Let an old man have one vice. I did quit smoking, like you asked.” “I know, but…” “So now just don’t worry. You’re going to get gray hair worrying and then you’ll have to become one of those bottle blondes,” my father teased. I shuddered. “Please, don’t threaten me with that. Some people do go snow white in their twenties.”

"Ah! Nothing, Jared. Your mother and I are just talking about something. She told me a joke, and it was so funny, which is why I burst out laughing." "May I know what joke it is, Dada?" Jessie laughed. "Oh, it is not for kids, Jared. Do not worry; once you finish your sketches there, Dada will tell you some jokes. Is that alright?" Jared thought about it for a couple of seconds before he nodded his head. "Alright, Dada!" Then he goes back to his sketch pad again. Jessie covered his mouth and chuckled as he took a glance at me. I glared at him and bumped his shoulder.

"But we can see you and you can hear u dad. Mum was just getting cost with me do you know how I have longed for that feeling?" "The boy has taken a lot from us. You two have no idea how much it means to me to see you hanging out and laughing, gossiping...." "No insults please" "Then why were you laughing while looking at us? That can only mean gossip" "Well one that's too much movies for a man your age and two we are not gossiping so believe us!" "Okay, okay...I was telling mum about Gideon and I" "And?" "She called me daughter of a bitch!" I said and restrained laughter, dad couldn't. It's not even close to funny but somehow we found it to be amusing.