Drunk Funnies Novels & Stories

Kimber asked. "Wow," Erin said, repeating everyone's earlier assessment of Kelly's outfit. "Shots!" Drake yelled. He turned and cocked his head at the bartender. "Hey Kelly, this one is for you," he said. "Can I get 11 red-headed sluts?" The bartender nodded and took Drake's card and started a tab. Kelly turned and flipped him the bird, being the red-headed slut from his joke. "So are you gonna dance tonight?" Marie asked Kelly, sliding close to her.

The humor in his eyes almost made me giggle. "Brett. I almost never drink. Why didn't you thwart this plan? One day was a rarity-two in a row is like a unicorn." "It might actually help the hangover if you had another drink." My face scrunched up in confusion. He'd lost his mind. "Remember I was in a fraternity. I know how to get over the next day." Brett sipped his coffee and stared back at the newspaper in front of him. "Stop gawking at me, Annie. I'm serious. Get a greasy breakfast and have a Bloody Mary. You'll be golden by lunch."

“No more beers for you.” She shot me a smile as she led him away. “Sorry, sometimes these guys get a little carried away with their fantasy role play. Especially when they’ve been drinking.” A little puzzled, I decided it was time to find Julie, who of course wanted to stay longer, even though I was beyond ready to call it a night. I told her about crazy Drake, and the cute guy she was with brushed if off, saying Drake got like this when he played Dragons and Dungeons. I was told to just ignore him. Julie told me the same thing and assured me that nobody wanted us

He’d rather make a pass—“Yeah. I am. It’s… well, it’s a long story. Can’t make it.” “Does this have something to do with a woman? There are only two reasons a guy is going to pass up fifty-yard line seats, and you aren’t dead.” If she bent over in front of that window one more time, he just might be. “Look, Drew, I gotta go. Call Randalls. He’s always good for a night out.” “All right, but don’t give me shit for not asking you. You were first on my list, Lo.” “Appreciate that.” Even if he didn’t believe it. He, Drew, and four other guys had been friends since the first project that had made them their money and repu-tations; someone was always available to catch a game or a bite with.

"So let's stop dragging this out. Time to drink!" Everyone cheered the moment I started the drinking session. This was what they had all been waiting for anyway. We all needed to unwind. And because of all the alcohol I drank, I did not even notice how much time had passed until I completely lost my senses. "Shit, Sis. You're drunk already..." Shainara muttered after seeing me crawling on the floor while laughing. I did not even know why I was laughing. Nobody told a joke, and nothing funny was happening around me.

He would enjoy this trip even if he had to force himself. Two bottles of Jack Daniels, three bottles of S of Spade and some others that he could not remember later, they were all laughing for no apparent reason. He could feel the buzz in his head, the haze in his eyes and the dryness in his throat. The strange sensations that floated through his body made him feel good and he knew that he was drunk.

“You don’t know even Naruto? Ha, busy getting rich, ain’t you?! Anyway, Sean, you did the right thing. Doesn’t matter if people knew Naruto. He couldn’t feed them. Tss. No. The animators, probably. The viewers feed them. “ “You're drunk, Sena.” “Just a little.” “Sure, I enjoy talking to you whenever you’re nuts.” “Tsss, I'm only the second ranking nutjob in the Philippines. Next to Sandara Park.” Sean just smiled. It was nice to see him happy. I propped my elbow wood to catch my face from falling to the table. He must’ve thought I was acting cute. But nah ah. Then he drank again. He took the bottle of wine and poured himself another glass. He raised it and asked me if I wanted more. I nodded

He was funny most of the time but somehow managed to take some of his jokes a little too far. “I like your creativity, but no. Come on, let’s make this a little more interesting people!” I said, now already done with my cider. Dante offered me another one which I wasted no time in raising to my lips. And as I did, everyone took their turn in guessing what activities had been occupying my time. They ranged from assassin training to nude painting and admittedly, we all laughed and drank ourselves silly until Randy yelled out, “Dante hasn’t said what he guessed. Tell her Dante, tell her your lame guess.” Dante rolled his eyes before saying, “It’s not lame!”

I ask innocently, wondering what I did this time that was so funny. "OMG! Luna! She's not talking about actual ‘Sex on the beach’." Carla says, laughing. This ‘sex on the beach’ is an alcoholic cocktail containing vodka, peach schnapps, orange juice, and cranberry juice. I feel my face heat up with embarrassment. "I see... Well, thank you all for laughing at me." I seriously said, pretending to be hurt by their behavior but immediately burst out in laughter. I couldn't keep up with the pretense, not while they were still laughing so hard.

"You don't do fun." "I do!" Dhruv exasperated while I tried to control my grin. "I can tell you the last time I had fun." All the eyes turned to him, waiting for his response. He scratched his jaw—the sign of his deep thinking. "Got it. This morning." "You spilled it by accident," I dead panned. He groaned. "How about two weeks ago when I made funny faces for Ria?"