Drunk Funnies Novels & Stories

It was good wine, and with Melody staying with my parents until I settled in here, I could let loose a little. And let loose I did. Before I knew it, I’d gotten far drunker than I intended—so much so that not even four slices of pizza and several garlic knots could sober me up. We were all thoroughly drunk by ten o’clock, laughing until we could hardly breathe over increasingly-ridiculous games of Charades. At one point, Drake swept Viona up and danced with her around the room, causing her face to turn as red as a strawberry. Noah and I leapt up as well, clasping our hands and twirling together until the room turned into a blur.

But between Colby regaling the greenhorns with his rodeo exploits, Gemma chatting up a storm with Channing, Cash scowling at him, Macie ignoring him, he felt the urge to get really really drunk. Damn, he wished his buddy Jack was here. Jack wouldn’t put up with this shit attitude. Jack’s motto was: “Be a man. Find some pussy, get fucked up, pick some fights and pass out.” Jack swore the only way to get out of a funk was to suffer through a debilitating day-long hangover. “Feelin’ like shit makes you appreciate the shit you’ve got,” was Jack’s other mantra.

"I agree. And I'm off for this entire weekend, with another doctor covering my service, so I'm free to get a little tipsy, too." I inclined my head her way. "Dr. Wakely, I believe we've just made a plan for this evening. Would you like to begin having fun with a Tropical Orgasm?" Alison's eyes went wide. "Um, what? Excuse me?" Laughing, I bent my head to speak close to her ear. "One of the little-known facts about me is that I'm an expert in dirty drinks. My brothers and I went through this phase in college where we competed to see who could find and consume the most cocktails that had really sexy names. One of my favorites was Tropical Orgasm. Trust me . . . you won't be the same after you'

The first and the last time we had clubbed had been on the night of our graduation from high school. The talking guy, seeing that none of his talks were getting to either I or Lucy, proposed a better drink to what we were taking. According to him, we were taking just water, a stupid humour that I wouldn't even call humour, because what I had been drinking was nowhere the cooling taste of water, and the joke wasn’t even damn funny.

They were sticky and burnt his throat when they went down but he was feeling a little better when they kicked. Jordan returned to the bar to get another drink and got Derrick this time when he raised his eyebrows at him. “You're drunk,” he stated. “Those purple shots are awesome, taste like grape!” he said with a shrug. “They're great because I feel like shit.” “Why?” “Realising how stupid I am, it's a life changing moment,” he murmured meeting his eyes when he was handed another beer. “You're only realising that now?” “Oh look it's funny's cousin...not funny!” he exclaimed pointing a finger at him.

I'd missed her. "Stupid. It's fun to have a few, it makes your troubles go away, everything seems fun, happy, for the most part. Some people are stupid or mean drunks, and you want to stay away from them, but most of my friends just do it to let go."

Just as he got there, Shawn knew who the madman wanted to spend his money on this many people. Standing at the table holding up a beer bottle, Adam babbled and laughed. Some of his friends forced him to get off the table, but Adam refused. He was so drunk that Shawn doubted he was serious about giving away free beers, but none of his friends stopped people from getting beers. So maybe it was confirmed that Adam had gone mad.

I start with a small giggle on my face. “I spent my day work all day, mmm at my family company” I laugh. “W-what! That was so boring” Z laughs. “Huh, and I got drunk in the middle of the night, in my bedroom floor, and woke up on couch all the time” I end. Both of us laughing because of the story, our faces are getting red because of the laugh. “Oh, my goodness! That’s insane!” Z tried to stop her laughs and leave a little giggle on her face. “Yeah, my life was insane!” I laugh softly.

I was having drinks at a friend’s house, and several of his other friends were there. They’re all straight (supposedly lol). We started getting kinda drunk, and my friend cracked a joke about me being gay. It’s totally fine, we joke about that stuff all the time.

Was he really a teenager? They were both ravenously famished when they got in, since they hadn't had anything substantial since that morning. They sat and digested afterwards while they watched the 'Drake and Josh' repeat episodes Tony had recorded from Nickelodeon. They both agreed that it was certainly a genius comedy, but not the ingenious comedy. That title, in Dillon's expert opinion, was for 'Seinfeld' of all shows. 'Yuck.' While Dillon took a swig of his energy drink, Tony rolled his eyes. He bitched at him for his diet and yet, the diabetic had energy drinks? Tony snorted.