Duck Jokes Novels & Stories

the time". Fuck, I hate myself...I don't want to talk about this shit! I want to talk about how cows moo and all that fucking shit. I wanted ice cream but the doctor said I wasn't allowed to eat it. How did Dumbledor even grow that long ass beard that's as long as the Mississippi river? Why is there such song as "What does the Fox say?" when obviously, the fox says "meow"?" I cry. Maddox laughs, "What's so funny? Do I look like a clown to you? I'm fucking crying and all you're doing is being an ungrateful husband to me!"

Dean who heard that curled his lips, Little Ce and Little Ron who heard that said simultaneously, "Why are Daddy's lips like a duck?" And everyone in the living room laughed with satisfaction, including Axel.

Madison nearly choked on her drink, and my mom covered her mouth as she let out a deep, amused chuckle. "This man really has a damn type, huh?" Madison snorted. "He’s like a walking punchline," I added, rolling my eyes. I texted Dom back: “My sister said the Chuckle Fuck sure has a type. Same thing you said.” A few dots appeared, then disappeared. Then reappeared. Dom: Lmao. She’s not wrong.

“Holy shit, is that you two?!” Dante tenses beside me and I squeeze his hand as I pretend I don’t feel him pulse with suspicion. “We played your game last year,” I say, voice chipper. “My husband here—” I bump Dante with my hip, “—couldn’t hit a single duck.” “Pff, that’s right!” The vendor laughs on cue. “You were adorable. You kept telling her you’d win her the pink bunny and ended up hitting the pole.” I snort. “He did. Twice.”

Joe who was using the dark web under the name "Darkknight" was delighted and surprised after he got a message from the famous hacker "Bumblebee", gone underground seven years ago. So, without thinking for another minute he quickly clicked on the message and opened it, and.......Wooooooshhhhhhh!..... within few seconds........ his screen went blank....... and all Joe could see on his screen was......... a dancing duck!!!! Joe face palmed himself, how could he do such a big mistake after so many years of experience in this industry?

The ride promising whiplash to the thundering bass of whatever new rock song was dominating the airwaves. But it was the carousel, as always, which grabbed his attention and drew him off the fairway. He threaded his way through the kiddie rides and the usual games. The Hot-Shot, with its subtly too-small hoop. The Balloon Shoot-Out, at which patrons tried to pop slightly under-inflated balloons with dulled darts. And of course, the ever-popular Duckie Pond, a kiddie pool filled with rubber duckies. The only object was to hook a ducky with a three-pronged hook on a pole. Of course, the prizes ranged from plastic cars whose tires fell off within the first ten minutes of use to gelatin plastic

“You look like someone who could use a good laugh.” I raise an eyebrow. “Do I?” “Yep. Lucky for you, I’m full of stories. Did I ever tell you about the time I outran a tornado in my old pickup truck?” I blink. “I don’t think so.” He launches into a tale so animated and absurd I can’t help but laugh. “...And there I was, wind howlin’, my dog howlin’, and me screamin’ at the top of my lungs like a banshee! But we made it, me and ol’ Duke.”

Get yo ass up. Alan Did you know dolphins give each other names? How fucking weird is that shit? I laughed again. Where did he come up with this stuff? If it wasn’t this.. it was really bad jokes. But I loved it. It always got a smile out of me. Alan Collinssssss wakey wakey eggs and bakey Alan Did you know that a blue whale’s tongue weighs as much as a baby elephant? Alan Did you know I can’t wait to see you when you get home?

Lia and Jake chuckled. "I never thought he was like us." "He is so funny. If you meet him, you will know how often accidental accidents happen with him. We have a prank day. When we were young, we did all the pranks on that day. So as a food prank, we made some chilli dumplings. And he was the one who got all of them in his plate. No one else got to eat that day. He ate one and ran away and we almost got punished for laughing so hard."

Too bad they never imagined I had already gotten rid of it. My phone suddenly buzzed with a message. I glanced down and smiled bitterly. Mom and Dad thought it was a concerned message from Byron, and they exchanged guilty glances. Unfortunately, they were only half right. It was indeed from Byron, but the message read, "Something came up at work. I won't be home tonight." Right after that, Claire sent me a video. Byron was in the hospital, head bowed as he peeled an orange for her, his gaze tender. The caption read, "I'm the one Byron loves. An ugly duckling is forever an ugly duckling. You'll never become a swan."