Funny Ways To Die Novels & Stories

Different sizes. Oh shit. Death by shovel. Shit. No. Just no. This paranoid asshole wasn't kidding around. And at the moment, death by asphyxiation sounded better in my head. ◇

" I'm not a terrible person so I'll let you choose your mode of death" She looked at him with disgust, if murdering his fellow human didn't make him a terrible person, then what would? " So tell me, will you like to die by hanging, poisoning, stabbing, drowning, falling off a balcony, gun shot,....." He listed a lot of dying modes to her but all she did was sob.

"Please drop the knife, Zaahida. Let's talk about this in a civilized manner." "Civilized manner?" She chuckled, humorlessly. "I have tried that as well, but..." She puffed out air from her mouth. "It didn't work. I realized I have to try another method. This method. Action! So tell me, Zynah...how do you want to die? Should I slit your throat or...cut your wrist instead? I want to get this over and done with."

Chris's POV I don’t even know when it escapes my lips. The words slip out before I can catch them, and the second they’re in the air, I’d sell what’s left of my dignity to stuff them back down. Ten different ways to die and I just picked the loudest, stupidest one. He stands.

Hence, many eccentrics came forth to challenge the virus. Unfortunately, these arrogant people all fell to the three glasses of Bloody Mary after the night. "I've never seen this guy before. He looks very unfamiliar! I guess he's a junior who stood out on impulse!" “That’s most likely the case. But sadly, he is absolutely dead tonight. Relying on his own hot blood to stand out, he is simply looking to die!” "That's right. Many extraordinary people have died to these three cups of Bloody Mary, let alone a nobody like him!"

Hadith shrugged, looking helpless. "Actually, you have another way," Chu Xun said. "Oh?" Hadith was interested. "What is it?" "Go to hell," Chu Xun said with a smile. "Go to hell?" Hadith stared blankly for a moment. Then he immediately roared with laughter, saying, "This is indeed a method. But I'm a god, I can't die even if I want to." "I don't think so. Maybe I can help you." Chu Xun narrowed his eyes slightly and said with a smile, "For example, if I take off your head, will you die?"

This was the most bizarre night of my life. "Are you…I'm sorry…Are you asking me, if you sexed a demon so good, you killed them?" "You're laughing but a man died today," she said solemnly. "Your laughing but I felt a man cum and die." "I'm…you're right, my apologies. Well, if it's any consolation, knowing Zee, he was probably very honored to spend his last moments doing what he loved best. But, I wouldn't fret too much here. Knowing Zee he's probably very much alive elsewhere, and this was only a minor inconvenience for the man. He's probably laughing it up."

The sound echoed across the arena. The lights flashed white. The cheers turned into gasps. Nathan’s knees buckled. The last thing he saw before everything went black was the en dless sea of faces screaming, panicking, crying—and the world spinning out of focus. And then...... nothing.

Camille laughed or tried to, but only guttural gurgling, a sound she was slowly starting to associate with her death, spluttered through her lips. "You think it's funny, don't you?" he asked. Yeah, it was funny, Camille thought as she gurgled again, and blood trickled down the corner of her lips. She always knew she was going straight to hell, but she never thought it would be in such a violent manner.

I said as she nodded her head continuously. "But sir, do you have a plan? I mean, it's your trial. Do you really have a plan?" "It's such a shame...they'll all die in my hand. Hey..." I said, smiling at her as I locked eyes with her. "Which do you think would be the most painful death? A poisonous meal that would sweep the whole of them, a bomb blast during the wedding venue...or killing the bride to create an everlasting pain...the same pain they had caused me?" I asked, laughing hysterically as I could see Jenna's hand shaking in fear.