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Mom came out of the bathroom, asking me where I had been.
Me: "Mom, meet Patricia. Come in here, Patricia. [She wiggled in on her flip-flops.] She is the low class tramp, the trailer trash that you noticed in the lobby. Patricia, sweetheart, close the door to our suite. [She does.] Patricia, take off those ragged clothes. [She does.] Sweetheart, bring that wood chair with the rounded hoop seatback, yes, that one, bring it here in front of my mom."