I Got A Feeling That I Just Can't Erase Novels & Stories

I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was, but the feeling persisted, like a whispered promise of something lost. The sensation was disorienting, like a whispered secret in a language I couldn't quite decipher. I felt a shiver run down my spine as I struggled to grasp what had been taken from me. It wasn't something tangible, like a possession or a memory. No, this was something far more ephemeral, a subtle erosion of my sense of self.

Easy peasy, right? But why can't I shake off the feeling that a line has been crossed?

I can’t bring myself to feel the same anymore. It’s a surprise no one has started rumors about my impotence yet. That one night with Lora has lingered in my mind and won’t leave, casting a shadow over others. I can’t forget her scent, the way I felt around her, her presence seems to have sparked a strange feeling within me that refuses to be quenched.

LUCA I COULDN'T STOP IT—staring at the spot she had been. I felt a cold shiver run through me as I tried to shake off the unsettling thoughts that kept circling in my mind. Why? Why did it feel like something had been ripped away the moment she left my side? I couldn’t remember the last time I’d felt like this. It was like a part of me had vanished when she walked away, and no matter how much I tried to distract myself, it wouldn’t go away.

His eyes darkened with pain, but I held my ground. “I can’t just forget what you did. I can’t erase the nights I cried myself to sleep, wondering if I was nothing more than a placeholder in your heart. I can’t erase that video, no matter how much you explain it. Do you understand that?” My throat tightened, and I pressed a hand against my chest. “I can’t erase the way you left me behind like I didn’t matter.” “Jess…” he whispered, but I cut him off.

I could almost feel the weight of his jacket wrapping around me like a protective shield against the world. "Erin, no more Clark, and no more Jacob, alright?" I said to myself, attempting to regain control. I was determined to free myself from the tangled web of memories and emotions. But try as I might, I couldn't shake off the hold they had on me. What is wrong with me? ...

Nothing I could define. What exactly had happened between us? A moment. A heartbeat. The space between words that felt loaded with everything we couldn’t say. But moments don’t make declarations, and heartbeats don’t sign contracts. So why did it feel like something had shifted irreversibly? I needed to forget. So I started cleaning.

"And no, I'm not feeling nostalgic. I just want to rip them to shreds and burn them crispy so I that I can forget that tomorrow is the 5th anniversary of the biggest mistake of my life! God, you have the worst taste in friends." "Whoa! Chill little! You're way too little to be thinking so deeply." I sighed. How did this all become my fault? "Okay, you know what? Go ahead and burn the letters if they give you any peace of mind. But remember one thing, erasing a few piece of papers will only erase his physical presence from your life. You have to move on." "Yeah....I know...." her voice sounded rueful. "Good. Now hang up, I have work to do."

“Alright. Hit me. Spew it all out. At least if it’s out in the open you can organize it and file it away with what’s important and what isn’t.” I sighed and leaned back, my head falling to the back of the couch as I looked up at the ceiling. “Eros is gone. I can’t even reach out to him. He’s just locked himself away. I can’t even catch a break. After so many years of being able to have moments where I don’t have to be in my own body, it’s like when I need it the most, he’s…” “Forcing you to face everything so you can’t just run away from your feelings?”

I stopped thinking because of those words in my mind. How can I be sure of my feelings that I don't love him anymore? Where did my love for Elijah go? Why does it seem to be suddenly erased? There are so many questions in my mind that I can't answer and I don't know who to ask for help. I have no one to talk to or share my grievances with. I'm like a well that accumulates feelings and is in danger of filling up and overflowing.