So Dumb Jokes Novels & Stories

I used to be that girl in the mafia—envied, untouchable. Orlando Leone, the big bad Don everyone feared, had eyes only for me. I took a bullet for him. After that? People whispered I couldn't have kids. He tried to shut them up by knocking me up—ninety-nine tries. Try number ten? His shiny new secretary texted, all confused over a decimal. He bailed on me. By thirty, she crashed his sports car while shopping. Claimed she couldn't park. I was left freezing in a bathtub. He said he loved me, but when it counted, he always picked the girl who played dumb and helpless. That's when it hit me—his love was never really mine. And by the time I disappeared for real, he lost his mind looking. Too bad. Me and that promise? Already buried at sea.

They say that your past is never really left in your past. I used to think that was dumb until I experienced it. Four years ago, I met the Devil. He gave me a chance to flee from him but I refused and ended up shooting him. Unfortunately for me, he returned four years later to claim me as his wife and drag me to Hell. He's going to make sure I pay for shooting him. He's going to punish me in the worst ways possible. He has promised to make me beg for mercy he'll never grant me. But then, he's not the only one hellbent on making my life a living Hell. There's another person causing havoc from the shadows. I would have to choose eventually- be with the Devil I know or side with the Devil I do not know.

When my mother-in-law has a heart attack, my husband, who's a heart surgeon, is busy preparing food for his first love's cat. I call him and urge him to return to save my mother-in-law. He says icily, "What is wrong with you, Esther? How dare you curse my mother just to make me head home!" After that, he hangs up. My mother-in-law dies in surgery, yet he's busy watching a concert with his first love. When he returns the following day to see me holding an urn, he's so angry that he throws the bag he's holding at me. "Look at how Lexie was considerate enough to buy clothes for my mother. All you know how to do is get Mom to pull these dumb acts with you!" I sneer. His mother is already dead—what use are those clothes?

On our fifth anniversary, Henry Judd—the guy who once swore he'd propose—rented out an entire mall for Cecilia Cheape's birthday. A diamond the size of a pigeon's egg sparkled on her finger. I'd been dumb enough to think it was meant for me. "Cece, I'm gonna give you a birthday you'll never forget," he announced, loud enough for the whole world to hear. Then he yanked the tab off a soda can and handed it to me. "Lulu, those gaudy things don't suit you. You deserve something unique." He slid the can tab onto my finger—his version of a proposal. Cecilia got the dream birthday. I got a piece of trash and a slap of reality. Later, when he found out I was marrying someone else, he got down on one knee with that same ring and begged me to say yes.

My wife cheated on me—with my cousin. The three of us were headed to sign divorce papers when bam—car crash. Next thing I knew, I was back on the day we got our marriage license. This time, no fights, no drama. We both knew it was over. She ditched me for Jason fast and skipped the country with him. I stayed behind, buried in law books and case files. Five years later, she was famous—thanks to Jason pulling strings. Concerts, cash, fans screaming her name. Me? Still grinding at a law firm, backing folks who needed real legal help. Then came the family reunion. She showed up on Jason's arm, smug and shining, throwing shade like it was sport. But when I mentioned I was settling down with someone else? Her face snapped. "I made one dumb mistake! How DARE you move on?!"

MEL – “I won’t be your sex toy”. It was all about the money and revenge. I will stay for the contract, deal with my step brother and disappear forever. So, I can’t possibly be falling in love with him, right? I mean, he is the mafia for goodness’s sake, a sexy one, but still. Then again, I never expected to need his protection from the past I can’t even remember. RIO – I wrap her hands along her lovely neck. “You are mine and don’t you ever forget that.” She was a permanent picture in my head and I craved her badly. So when her dumb brother offers her on a platter to me, I will do anything to make sure she stays and gives herself to me willingly for my pleasure. Now, I think I’m falling for her, which really sucks, as she turns out to be a key to the mystery that haunts me.

Our third anniversary trip to Hawaii was supposed to be a new beginning—just me, Tom, and our son. But then she showed up. Blair. Our single, sexy neighbor with a killer smile and a suitcase full of charm. I thought she was just tagging along. I was wrong. One night, I overheard her hiss, “Why the hell didn’t you just let her die?” That’s when it hit me—Blair wasn’t just having an affair with my husband. She had planned to let me drown in the tsunami. I survived. But I kept quiet. I decided to play dumb—to smile, to act fragile, to stay close—for my son’s sake. I needed to know what they really wanted… and how far they’d go. Then, on my son Noah’s birthday, he made a wish. “I want Aunty Blair to be my new mommy.” The candles flickered. My heart cracked. Had Blair already replaced me?

The story of 'EVERY WOMAN CANNOT BE PRETTY' is a message to millions of women around the world who feel inferior due to their average looks that ‘ Beauty is not in the face alone.’ The protagonist in this story, Sarah Liam suffers from PCOS ( Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) with side effects of being obese, acne prone and having more than normal hair growth on face and body. To top it she is short in height and has a prominent mole on her chin. In all, she is not what one can call “pretty”. Her husband wants to use her as a sex toy, her best friend betrays her trust by sleeping with her husband. Faced with treachery by loved ones, shunned by many, at the brunt of the unkindest of jokes, the story shows how Sarah manages to rise like a Phoenix, hold her head high and eke revenge on the people who have cheated her, solely with the strength of her talent and grit. But with her flawed appearance, will she ever find true love? Can she ever aspire to marry a handsome man or will she have to settle for someone similarly flawed? Read on..

[How do you avoid the darkly handsome Beta that wants to... eat you?] Camilla: I was sent to Alpha Jackal’s mansion to pay off my foster parent’s debt. It wasn’t something I feared until I learned that Rin, the pack's Beta, is a powerful demon. Now I'm stuck under the same roof as Rin, and there is no chance of avoiding him. I wish I could. Why? Because a demon murdered my parents in cold blood. I fear Rin. Demons are monstrous, which is why it must be one of life's cruel jokes to have inserted Rin into my life. Rin: I should stay away from the new housekeeper, but how could I possibly keep away from the seductive she-wolf? She is gorgeous, and my Alpha would punish me if he knew badly I wanted her to sit on my face, squirming and moaning my name. He can never know the truth, especially not since he seems interested in her too.

"How dare you keep my son away from me?!" "You rejected me and didn't want to do anything with me!" "I will reject you all over again to punish you for this!" "Jokes on you if you think I care about your rejection anymore." ___ Delilah was the contracted bride of Alpha Stephen Knight even after being his fated mate. Losing her parents at a young age was hard enough for her and getting brutally rejected by her mate was the last straw for her. She left with dignity and vowed to never turn back. But what happens when her past comes back to prove destiny once again? Stephen Knight never wanted anything to do with her but was that going to change when he sees her after years? She has changed but he hasn't. He is still the same heartless man. In the game of lies, revenge and pain, they will discover truths that's going to shatter their lives. Will Delilah find Stephen beside her or will he break her heart once again?