Best Funny Pickup Lines Ever Novels & Stories

“Duh mister, I won't introduce you with someone who's just sixteen or seventeen years old, what is that pedophile? But of course, age doesn't matter for those who truly love each other” "Naks pick-up line ma'am?" "Yes you want me to pull your testicles?" “What the—”, hahahahahahahahaha I really can't stop laughing What is this woman saying? It's so gross hahahahahahahahaha "Hehe just a joke, but do you know Alexa Eunice Wilzt?" “H-Ha? Who's that?" "Oh hehe you can't fool me mister, you're obvious, so how did you meet her?"

I can guarantee you that my chat up lines are worse than anything you've ever heard! "spill Jones!" fuck her cheeky side is such a turn on. "haha, ok ok, feel my shirt. know what it's made of? boyfriend material!" "that's brilliant, another one?" "Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you got the nicest set of buns I've ever seen!" she's laughing so hard that she has tears in her eyes and her laugh is music to my ears. "now your turn!" "I've only ever said a chat-up line to someone once and that was because I lost a bet but it was... I think there's something wrong with my phone. your numbers not in there!"

“And I want to court you to be my girlfriend.” Even worse! I shrugged my head in disapproval. “You’re joking.” “Do I look like it?” “You don’t look like a clown but damn, you have a talent to be one,” I spat in annoyance. “What did you even saw in me? I’m not even beautiful!” “You are! I was in fact, blinded by your dazzling beauty,” I frowned at his clichéd pickup line. It was so cheesy I wanted to puke again right now to turn him off. I always hated awkward moments like this.

I haven't responded to him before he said, "You light my world the moment you step in." I scrunch my face in confusion. "What?" "That's a pickup line", Becky commented. I burst out laughing at Becky's comment. "A pick-up line? It sucks." I laughed some more. The guy was handsome no doubt but, what sort of pickup line is that? I asked inwardly. The first thing you say to a girl is a pick-up line? That's absurd! The guy only smiled as he stood with his broad shoulders confidently, twirling his fingers around the glass of wine in his hand.

“Not everyone is destined to be mopy all day.” “I was happy this morning.” Flipping him off, he just laughed and sat down on the other side of Jo. “Seriously, why are you so happy?” Beau leaned over Jo and looked at him. “I used this sick pickup line on a girl and it worked.” “I got one for you.” I said, glancing at Steele. “Oh yeah? Let’s hear it.” All eyes turned to me as I set my rag down. “Are you a smoke detector? Because you won’t shut up and fucking annoying.”

“Borrow for a while, okay?” He looked at me like he thought I was high or something and then he nodded. I watched her. She was alone. Now, I wish I knew some pick-up lines. Or if I did, I knew how to use them effectively! But so far the only things that I could remember hearing around were: ‘Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?’ or ‘I lost my phone number, so can I have yours?’ and ‘If I say you have a wonderful body, will you hold it against me?’

I asked him as if he was crazy, but I was laughing on the inside. “Gah! Can’t you just let me have fun for once! That’s already twenty pick up lines and usually they work for most girls! Why are you so good at this?” He asked frustrated, but quickly erased it with a smirk. Oh no, here it goes again. “I wonder what else you’re good at,” he said suggestively, arching his eyebrow in a seductive way. I threw him one of my French fries and it landed on his gray shirt, leaving a spot of oil behind. “Gosh, this was a new shirt!”

What is his deal anyway? "I would use a cheesy pick-up line but damn baby I'm vegan," Kai said after a few minutes of thinking over it. I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face as I desperately willed myself not to laugh because then he would be sad. "Real smooth mate, total game changer right there," Jake said with amusement lacing his chocolate brown eyes. Kai seemed content with what he said and grinned from ear-to-ear like a Cheshire cat. "Yep I'm good, ain't I?"

Zack said, and Kinsley giggled. What the...! "That is the lamest pickup line I've ever heard." Zach frowned, and the others started laughing. Zack stumped out of the room, embarrassed, and Mike took his place. "Don't worry, baby, he's a boy. I'm the man you're looking for."

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆ JAMES POV As per her instruction once she left my office I read the note that she gave me Dear Mr. Ceo It hurt to see your gorgeous face everyday but who am I to complain? Smile but not to often because the female population might not survive😉 It makes me laugh out loud. I did not remember when is the last time I laugh this loud and so carefree. She thinks I am gorgeous? She is the gorgeous one. If this is a pick up line I am 100% sure it is effective because I am ready to follow her wherever she goes. One sided love sucks!