Best Funny Pickup Lines Ever Novels & Stories

Jerome Lin, only child of beauty mogul Miranda Lin, has lived his life beneath the weight of legacy. As managing director of Linéa Cosmetics, he has everything,wealth, power, and a love he thought would last forever. Until he discovers that his girlfriend is secretly involved with Akihiko Tanaka, the man his mother is determined to marry for influence. His trust shattered, Jerome confronts Miranda, only to be dismissed as collateral damage. She marries the man anyway. When Akihiko’s enigmatic son Collins returns to Japan to inherit the Tanaka empire, the two men meet and instantly clash. Their parents expect them to cooperate. Instead, they glare, argue, clash, and burn with a tension neither can explain. But beneath that friction lies something magnetic. Something dangerous. Forced to attend dinners, business meetings, and social events together, hatred turns into curiosity… then slow, forbidden attraction. Their first intimate moment is discovered, and their parents explode into rage, threatening to disown them both. Jerome and Collins choose each other anyway, leading to the bitter collapse of their parents’ marriage. Finally free to be together, they begin planning a future,until Collins’s ex arrives claiming she has his child. Jerome breaks apart, terrified of losing everything again. A DNA test reveals the truth: the child is not Collins’s. His ex fabricated everything to claw her way back into his life. With the truth unveiled, Jerome and Collins reunite stronger than before. Their parents move on…Miranda marrying a rising politician, and Akihiko marrying Jerome’s ex. Meanwhile, Jerome and Collins build an empire of their own, built on love, forgiveness, and the fire that first brought them together. A love story born from hate. A romance they were never meant to have. A destiny they chose anyway.

There's nothing more shattering than hearing that you're signed off as a collateral to marry in order to clear off your uncle's stupid debts. "So this is it" I pull the hoodie over my head and grab my duffel bag that is already stuffed with all my important stuff that I need for survival. Carefully I jump down my window into the bushes below skillfully. I've done this a lot of times that I've mastered the art of jumping down my window. Today is different though, I'm not coming back here, never! I cannot accept marrying some rich ass junkie. I dust the leaves off my clothe and with feathery steps, I make out of the driveway. A bright headlight of a car points at me making me freeze in my tracks, another car stops and the door of the car opens. There's always only one option, Run!

Matthew Guerrero is the youngest son of a Mafia boss. He is a hot-headed man who always lets his fists act before his brain. But on the day he almost died at the hands of a treacherous client of his family, a man saved him—and that man was none other than Kaizer, someone who drifts from job to job. Their paths cross again when Kaizer becomes a bodyguard for the Guerrero family. Even though Kaizer once saved Matthew’s life, the two of them still constantly clash, both inside and outside the Guerrero mansion. Yet as time goes by, they slowly come to understand each other, and no one can separate these two men—through hardship and joy, they are always together. They get kidnapped together, shot together, end up in the hospital together, and even suffer food poisoning together from the street food they ate. After everything painful they have gone through, they are always side by side. Until little by little, what they feel for each other begins to change. Matthew thinks at first that it is just because Kaizer is his friend, but he realizes that what he feels for the man who is always with him is something far deeper. It is not easy for them to confess their feelings to each other before finally becoming a couple and doing the things only couples do. But behind those happy moments, Kaizer is hiding a secret—one that will shatter Matthew’s heart and world. A secret he has kept hidden for so long, one that will eventually explode and damage their love: a love born from trust and true affection… and lies.

THEY SAID NO WAY..................... Ashton Cooper and Selena McKenzie hated each other ever since the first day they've met. Selena knew his type of guys only too well, the player type who would woo any kinda girl as long as she was willing. Not that she was a prude but there was a limit to being loose, right? She would teach him a lesson about his "loving and leaving" them attitude, she vowed. The first day Ashton met Selena, the latter was on her high and mighty mode looking down on him. Usually girls fell at his beck and call without any effort on his behalf. Modesty was not his forte but what the hell, you live only once, right? He would teach her a lesson about her "prime and proper" attitude, he vowed. What they hadn't expect was the sparks flying between them...Hell, what now? ..................AND ENDED UP WITH OKAY

He is a handsome Billionaire. He needed an heir. Surrogacy is the answer. I love her. She is beautiful and talented. She is hopeless and needs money. Surrogacy is the answer. I love him. A surrogacy contract that explores her personality, her soul, and the inner sanctum of her heart. She discovers a new way of life with the Billionaire, the Personal Assistant, and the Valet. A whirlwind of passion, desire, and love.

A woman who once worked in a casino dreamed of becoming rich, but she fell in love with a billionaire's bad-boy son. He got her pregnant and left her. After giving birth, she vowed never to return to the casino. Desperate to support her child, she became a maid—only to discover she now works in the house of the man she hates, Gabriel Bustamante, whom she hasn’t seen in five years. Gabriel, now engaged to another woman, doesn’t know he has a child. Living under the same roof, emotions resurface as Gabriel persistently tries to reconnect, slowly breaking down Samantha’s anger. One day, he kisses her—just as his fiancée walks in. Things become more complicated as her gilfriend begins to suspect Samantha and Gabriel is hiding something.

TWO PINK LINES, ONE NIGHT STAND --- Beth Williams knew the rules at Knight Tower: clean, stay invisible, never look the billionaire in the eye. She broke them all at the masquerade gala. One spilled drink on CEO Adrian Knight became a $50,000 dance. One dance became one elevator. One night in a masked stranger’s arms became two pink lines six weeks later. Now Beth is fired, homeless, and pregnant with Adrian’s baby. He doesn’t remember her face from that night, but he remembers the scandal: a cleaner accused of corporate espionage. When she tells him the truth, Adrian voids his engagement to shipping heiress Valeria D’Souza and moves Beth into his penthouse that night. There are no phones. No unlocked doors. No escape. Adrian calls it “protection.” Beth calls it a gilded cage. He’s haunted by his mother’s death in childbirth and believes control keeps people alive. His heir will not grow up poor, endangered, or unloved, even if he has to become a monster to guarantee it. But Valeria brings a knife to Beth’s throat. The board demands a paternity test. And when Beth bleeds at 14 weeks, Adrian flies them to a private island with no way out. Trapped together, Beth learns Adrian kept her hairpin from that night. He never forgot her. She was his first choice in ten years, not a mistake. When premature labor, CPS, and his own trauma collide, Adrian must decide what he fears more: losing control, or losing her. Because Knights don’t lose what’s theirs. The question is whether Beth will choose to be his.

My husband has slept around thousands of times, yet he has never agreed to a divorce. His family calls me a low-class nobody who's unfit to be seen. Five years ago, the first time I asked for a divorce, Hugo Hudson said nothing. He simply locked me inside the villa for a full month. A month later, I discovered I was pregnant. Three years ago, I brought it up again. That very night, Hugo returned to his family's estate. Soon after, I was granted the right to see my child once a week. Today is the third time. And this time, I can finally leave. Because I've realized something at last: my child doesn't love me, and my marriage was never real to begin with. I'm no different from the women he keeps outside. When we met again later, Hugo's eyes reddened the instant he saw me.

In the tenth year of my marriage to a genius pianist, I came down with a strange illness. A month ago, my husband missed my birthday party to care for his ailing sister-in-law. Night after night, I had waited for him to return home. But that night I forgot to wait at all and went to bed early. Half a month ago, he attended an important performance with his sister-in-law. I had always been petty and prone to jealousy, yet this time I didn't get angry. I simply went home in silence. Three days ago, I fell seriously ill with a burning fever. My husband rushed back from out of town in a panic—but only to tend to his sister-in-law, whose hand had been scalded. When we ran into each other at the hospital, I was strangely calm. I, who used to be fiercely jealous, felt nothing at all. I forgot the promise we had made to grow old together. I even forgot how he once fretted over me for days when I'd scraped a bit of skin. It wasn't until he said he wanted to bring his sister-in-law home and take care of her for the rest of his life that I—my memories riddled with holes—summoned the system at last. "I want to go home."

She stood in the driveway watching the ambulance pull out. Feeling more alone than ever, tears streamed down Tatiana's face. Her father looked so weak and human. Looking back at the house, She could not go in. She could smell sickness inside. Blinded by tears, she made a run for the forest. Shedding her clothes under a rock before crashing in deeper. The forest around her was a blur. What if her father never came back? She would have no one. What had she done to the Moon Goddess to be forsaken? Her fear switched to anger, and she pushed forward faster and faster. Talia's muscles burned, but she kept running. As her wolf finally entered a clearing, her fur stood on end. On the other side of the clearing stood a sizeable sandy-colored wolf with amber eyes fixed on her. His ears perked up, and his head cocked to the side. Staring at each other from across the field, Tia could not take her eyes off him. She had never been this close to another wolf, and he was beautiful. Wobbling slightly, Tatiana realized she better move to the cover of the trees. As she turned, she heard an earth-shattering snap, and pain rolled up her left leg. She collapsed and looked down at her leg. It was caught in a trap. Her white fur turning red as blood seeped from the wound. Forgetting about the other wolf, she let out a tortured howl. Stabbing at the trap with her free paw, she whimpered and whined in agony. Her head rolled back as the pain threatened to render her unconscious. It was then that she noticed the wolf again. He had moved across the clearing and was now standing above her, and this time he was not alone.