Dad Joke Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

Cain jokes and Dad looks unembarrassed. “Wow, Dad is a stud,” I tease as we eat. “Am I not allowed to have a little fun?” Dad asks. “You could get a second chance,’ I smile at him. “I’m 45 years old. I don’t see a new mate anytime in my future. I may choose one, but it will be a while” Dad winks at me again. “I think Susan is willing,” I tease. “I prefer she-wolves, thank you,” Dad shakes his head.

he said, a smile spreading across his face. I had to keep myself from laughing. “My night is already pretty great,” I lied, taking another sip of the beer. “I doubt you can top it.” “You know…” he said, there was more humor in his tone. “It’s dangerous for a pretty thing like you to be wandering around alone.” I had to bite my lip to keep from bursting into laughter. That was his pickup line? Seriously? “I’m not so delicate,” I told him. “Why don’t you prove it,” he said, pushing another beer in my direction.

he said, placing his hands over his heart. "Does this really always work for you??" She asked, shaking her head in disbelief. "What??" He asked "These cheesy pick up lines from g****e," Zada asked, genuinely wondering. "It's not from g****e," he said, frowning. "Well Fredrick. I happen to have a brother who used up all these pick up lines when he was in High School." Zada said dryly. "It sounds like your brother and I would get along very well" he said and that made Zada sober up.

I noticed his lips were moving before his words registered. Thankfully, that snapped me out of my shameless leering of him. “Here’s your drink,” the bartender said. I snatched up the glass and took an obnoxious long suck. Then slammed it back down that the glass almost broke. “Oh I’m sorry, dad. Pardon me for wanting a nice glass of juice after I just found my fiancé cheating on me. With his stepbrother! But oh, I’m so sorry that my choice in beverages annoys you! Accept my deepest apologies. Happy now?!”

“Let me get this straight, you’re basically dating your stepsister.” “No.” JD grinned as he shook his head. “Basically, I’m going to marry my stepsister.” Shifting, he opened the door. “This place has an awesome patty melt.” “What the hell is up with you dropping bombs like this and then be all about the damn food?” the other man asked as he also got out of the pickup and followed JD inside. JD was laughing at his friend as they went through the door. A cute little blonde with legs for days and a rack that was making Cooper drool, smiled at them.

“What about this? I will try not to sneak into your room at night and suffocate you with your own stinking socks?” I sneered at him, clenching my fists. Leaning his head back, he busted out laughing, and I began to think he was missing some vital component in that empty head of his. Or is his mind just drifting? “Oh, I don’t know. I think that sounds interesting; I'd like you to try that!” My jaw almost hit the floor, and the burn in my cheeks spread like wildfire when I caught up. Quickly, I shut my mouth and glared at him. What the hell is wrong with this guy? Cheesy pick-up lines? Now? He definitely needs new antennas!

It wasn't just me who heard what Hubert Lock said. His parents heard them too. Laidman Lock immediately raised a hand and smacked Hubert lightly on the arm, irritation creeping into his voice. "What kind of nonsense are you talking about? Who jokes with their wife like that?" Michelle Lock quickly patted the back of my hand and comforted me softly. "Crystal, don't take it to heart. It's April Fools' Day, isn't it? Hubert was just being thoughtless and making a joke."

someone yelled. "I won’t shut up until someone answers!" Lucas shouted back, clearly enjoying the attention. "We don’t know and we don’t care, so shut the hell up, Lucas!" another voice barked. "Wrong! It’s called Lemon-aid! Get it? Like the drink?" The groan this time was even louder. "Dad jokes are never, ever funny," Elodie muttered, shaking her head.

JACKSON “Good morning Jack. You have a letter.” “I do?? Who’s it from and why should I be interested. It’s from Nora you ass, get up. You can’t drool in your piss all day.” “Fuck off Jer. Now’s not the time.” “There’s always time for sweet jokes. You know that. Here.” To the nice man turned DAD

What is his deal anyway? "I would use a cheesy pick-up line but damn baby I'm vegan," Kai said after a few minutes of thinking over it. I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face as I desperately willed myself not to laugh because then he would be sad. "Real smooth mate, total game changer right there," Jake said with amusement lacing his chocolate brown eyes. Kai seemed content with what he said and grinned from ear-to-ear like a Cheshire cat. "Yep I'm good, ain't I?"