Deep Thoughts Funny Novels & Stories

"Why are you hating. He isn't funny at all." "You do know what that means... it means that you are not even close to being funny.." I rolled my eyes, "stop being so jealous Vee, I'm funny and you know it." "Keep dreaming.." Today was the first day we actually were talking freely like this. I suppose it was because we are like in the same room. I laughed, "anyways check page 208 this guy knows his staff.. he has to take the first prize..." She sighed, "okay fine.. AUDACITY takes the first place.. let's..."

My case was just another sorry case of bad Luck. I chuckled out loud at the thought. I didn’t need to catch myself on this one. I wouldn’t even know what to say if he asked me what was funny. “I know right…” he deeply sighed, “It is stupidly intense, I wish we would finally just dump some silly traditions because they do nothing for us, I can’t lie.” “That I agree—” I caught myself on the tongue. I must still be tripping or something because I could swear I saw an image of Cynthia glaring at me right in my face.

I acknowledged. "If I were you I'd be on him like a baby sloth on its mama." I looked at her, trying get my fuzzy brain to process what she'd just said without success. We looked at each other and both dissolved into laughter, "What's so funny?" A deep voice cut off our laughter.

“You find this amusing, human?” I somber up right away. “I-I…no, not really. It’s actually very tragic, I think. But I have an unfortunate habit of having odd thoughts here and there and this scene kinda reminds me of…soap operas…but with wolves instead of humans…which was funny…to me, at least.” I wince when I see her staring at me. “Not anymore.” I mutter lamely, completely chastised. I hear her snicker. “Relax, I’m not judging you. And you’re right, it kinda is funny. Their drama has gone on long enough.”

I burst out laughing so hard I nearly choked on my soda. Jenna looks deeply unimpressed. “Yeah, real fucking funny,” she mutters, side-eyeing both of us. “Keep laughing, you bunch of soggy mofos. I’ll remember this when you two need someone to body a man for you in public and I’m too busy teaching spin hooks to felons named Big Maria.” Dawn snorts into her drink. “You’d thrive in there, don’t lie.” “Shut up,” Jenna says, but she’s already smiling.

She had an amused smile plastered on her face, like she was joking about adding too much sugar in my coffee. It took me a moment to recover before I finally replied, "Of course not. I don't even like bars. I was starting to get really scared if I had a doppelganger whom you might have seen instead." Why the fuck did I say that?? Now this weirdo would think I found her very expensive and not so funny prank, amusing. Melanie clapped her hands once, "See?! I think we both have the sense of humor. Oh my goodness, you Moonlight Pack folks are too serious to take a joke. " She commented and started to chuckle.

I say this as I sip on my juice. “Yeah? So we, I guess, then buy our coffins and dig our graves before we leave this house, right?” Huh! Can you listen to this girl? I am here saying, and I have it embedded in every being and sense of me, that I am not letting these people hurt me, even just a little. My only friends are already envisioning corpses? “Will you just stop? Your joke isn't funny at all." I state.

Bradley Fry, my CEO husband, loves bringing his friends home for meals the most. He claims that this makes them feel like an actual family. As they drink in the feast I've whipped up for everyone, one of Bradley's friends comments smilingly, "I knew that you were a virtuous one, Emily! Now this is how the legitimate wife should act!" My expression doesn't falter as I ask in a half-joking manner, "Oh? Does Bradley have a spoiled and pampered mistress by his side, then?" His friends are stunned by my question. A trace of panic crosses their eyes simultaneously. But Bradley just wraps an arm around my shoulders with a smile. "Don't listen to their nonsense, Emily. Who else is worthy as my

I meant it when I think about these disturbing thoughts. I can't help it; these chuckles are like some kind of torture that I can't shake. They're like a cancer that I can't cure, and I'm starting to think that they're purposefully trying to drive me crazy. It's like they're enjoying making me feel this way, like they're some kind of twisted cosmic joke. But it's not funny. I want to screw them all.

She deadass did save my life but something in the back of my mind kept telling me that was not the reason I was agitated to meet her. "Then tell me what the fuck the reason is, you stupid brain." I yelled into my pillow, muffling the sound to the point where it almost sounded non-existent. I'm not one to play mind games, I just wanted to know the reason. Did you get the pun there? I'm so fucking funny. I know you're shaking your head thinking of what a stupid pun that was. But you know it was fucking lit. Maybe I should go into Comedy instead, I'm too funny for Urban/Realistic/Drama. Imagine my next stop being called Life of Eve: Comedy and Puns. What do you think?