German Jokes Novels & Stories

I muttered, “if I wanted you dead, I wouldn’t poison you. I’d shoot you instead.” Their mouths dropped open, and I realized too late that I shouldn’t be joking about something like that. A nervous laugh fell from my lips. “I—I was only joking. You’d be able to smell poison from a mile away, and I know you’ll get the gun away from me within seconds.” Devrim was the first to break the silence. “You humans have a sick sense of humour. I don’t really see what’s so funny in what you said.” “I’m sorry.”

Jack’s cold voice sounded again. “That’s amazing!” “It can’t be! Even a judge can do that? Kill someone in the police station?” “This is too weird! I can’t believe it! He actually killed two people in an instant? Judge, you’re simply a god!” “Hitler’s death is so disgusting. I just ordered a barbeque. Looking at the barbeque now makes me think of the scene where his eyeballs were being pierced by a pencil!” “Haha! Braised eyeballs. Eating them might cure myopia. Eat more!”

scoffed the spirit as it continued laughing for quite a while. Not expecting the senior to laugh at him like that, the now frowning Gerald then muttered, “Is my loss that funny to you, senior…?” “Hmm? Oh no, I’m not laughing about you! I’m laughing about Henrick!” replied the tree spirit as he quickly explained himself to avoid any misunderstandings.

I mouth off to them, and they made up what I was saying. “I’m a Pumpernickel fart. Now that’s rude,” Gio chuckles. “She’s saying you love goat cheese,” Justine giggles. “No, Lola’s saying she wants to make goat cheese and cause us to have pumpernickel farts,” Markum finishes. I forgot what I was trying to say, as laughter is the best medicine, even if it hurts now. My silent giggle is cute, helping me forget my worries. Seeing their happy faces adds to my healing, making me feel grateful to have them.

someone yelled. "I won’t shut up until someone answers!" Lucas shouted back, clearly enjoying the attention. "We don’t know and we don’t care, so shut the hell up, Lucas!" another voice barked. "Wrong! It’s called Lemon-aid! Get it? Like the drink?" The groan this time was even louder. "Dad jokes are never, ever funny," Elodie muttered, shaking her head.

She asked, pinching his cheek gently. "That's impossible.I've been practicing jokes.”Matteo grinned proudly. "Oh… really?" "Yes… I have seventeen already." "Should I be worried?"Sofia asked, looking toward Lorenzo. "Yup! You should be very worried." "They're terrible," Marco added. "Noo… they're masterpieces," Matteo corrected. "Alright, I'll be the judge of that," Sofia said. "Good. I'll save the funniest one for you,” He said, leaning close and whispering loudly enough for everyone to hear.

I snapped. “Boss, wir haLegolas hier leLegolasde.” I heard another guy in the back. For some reason I knew it was German. I have never taken a foreign language in my life so how I knew that much surprised me. The guy on the phone chuckled, “Look dearie, I’m not out to start any trouble. I just had a simple question for you.” “I’m not answering shit until I know who the fuck I’m talking too. Last chance before I hang up.” I snapped back.

That wasn’t your name, and how the hell did you get bread guy to laugh? I returned to my post behind the counter and punched in the latest order. ‘Bread’s guy’s a French guy.’ I looked up at the deadpan face with a sweet smile. ‘So?’ I opened my palm and a hundred dollar bill slapped onto it, alongside a fuming knit of brows. Checking the note before slotting into my butt pocket, I murmured, ‘So I just made someone tell him a joke in French, and he laughed.’ ‘Wha-da fuck.’ Felix rolled his eyes. ‘And what sick joke is that?’

"You're not funny, Rob." "Mom's right." Saint agreed. Uncle Ricardo grumbled something under his breath and continued with his dinner. "You Germans seriously lack a sense of humor." He muttered sulkily. Aunt Maria raised a blonde brow at him. "You sometimes forget I'm part Italian." She smiled a little. "Your jokes are the only ones I can't handle, but I don't mind others." Wow, savage.

I can't– I just can't with this friend of mine. "Your jokes are all lame. Even an infant won't find it funny." I said and they all laughed at what I have said. Well, it is the truth. "Who would laugh at a joke saying 'are you a clown? 'Cause you're just a clown'?" I asked. " It looks like someone is stunned because of the smile for his love of his life." Mr. Kirke was teasing Mr. Disero. I was curious to know who it was but ended up not to ask since it was none of my business.