Hug Myself Artinya

Everyone knew how much I was in love with Alex Carter. I was willing to do anything for Alex just to see him happy and never bothered if they ruined my dignity or worth. But to Alex, I was seen as a desperate shameless lady who wanted him by all means even though I knew he always had a lover. After we got married, he treated me like dirt and threw me in prison, accusing me of financial crimes. Killed by a jailer sent by him, I died with regret of loving him. When I woke up again, I found myself back on my wedding day with Alex in my previous life and realised it was an afterlife, a second chance at life. This time, I wouldn't let him ruin me twice.

"What I want to do to you," He murmured as he buried his face on my hair, "I want to bend you over this counter and fuck you to oblivion." My heart leaped and my face flush. I couldn't let him get to me, I kept promising myself that. But when the stupid bond keep getting stronger and I couldn't resist his seduction, it was only a matter of time for me to give in to Kian Santos. ***** She was the good girl. Faye Bennett. She could do no wrong in her father's eyes. She was the next in line Alpha of her Pack, she was held to a high standard, very much respected. But a one night mistake ruined her life. The night when the tyrant Alpha whose name is Kian Santos refused to let her go.

“7 Million Dollars and 28 cents.” That was what I saw written on the blood stained papers I picked up from the ruins of my father’s burnt down restaurant. His arrest, our debts it all came crashing down on me in one night. Desperate, I ran to my fiancé for help… only to find him sliding a ring onto another woman’s finger. My heart shattered into pieces. From then on, I was nothing but a beggar ,broken, humiliated, and alone. Until one night changed everything. I opened my eyes to find myself tangled in dark silk sheets… in the bed of the most feared mafia lord on the continent. My ex’s future father-in-law. Ruthless. Dangerous. And for reasons I couldn’t understand he had claimed me.

My name is Christian Thompson, and once upon a time, I was the best striker in European football. That was until he came along—Ashford Ryder, young and carefree, 10 years my junior and the new shining star. I hate him. At least that's what I tell myself. Not just because he's taken my spot, but because he's everything I've struggled all my life to be, and not to be. He's vibrant, he's happy, and the worst of all, he's openly gay. I'm not homophobic, quite the opposite—I've lived in the closet all my life. All my life, I've had to hide who I am to please the people around me. European football hasn't always been this accepting of gay men, and I'd squeezed myself into a box to fit in with what they wanted of me. It isn’t that hard when you think about my family who'd rather disown me than have an openly gay son. So imagine how I feel when the world decides to be more accommodating to people like Ashford Ryder when they shoved me in a box. It's not so easy to hate the happy-go-lucky striker, when he does everything to get close to me, despite my insistent hatred for him. He's like a thorn in my side—a hot, sexy, blonde, 5ft9 thorn I can't stop thinking about. But when one day I lose my cool around the popular striker and land myself in bad press, I end up needing his help. It's supposed to be easy. Spend some time with Ashford Ryder, and show our fans that we can work together—it's what I need to do to save my career. But no one tells you how hard it is to hate someone you spend every waking hour dreaming about.

I fell in love with a man I should never have touched—my brother-in-law, Lucas Zahn. The first time he came to our home with my sister, Quincy, they looked like the perfect couple. He smiled at me, held out a peace talisman bracelet, and said it would keep me safe. I wore it like it was the most precious thing in the world. When the old injury in my ankle flared up, he would scoop me into his arms and rush me to the hospital without a second thought. When thugs tried to harass me, he made them scatter with a single look, then spoke to me in a voice so gentle it made my heart tremble. I told myself I understood—that everything he did was only because I was Quincy’s younger sister. Even so, I clung to those rare moments when I could be near him. Until the night Lucas was drugged by an enemy, his life teetering on the edge. If no one acted, he would die. So, I acted. On that reckless, desperate night, my sister walked in. The sight struck her like a lightning bolt, and she collapsed, her weak heart seizing on the spot. What came next was madness. In a frenzy of rage and panic, Lucas tied me to an operating table. His hands—those hands I once longed to hold—cut open my chest and tore my heart out for her. “When the avalanche hit, Quincy nearly died saving me. I swore I’d treat her well for the rest of my life. That means loving her family, too. I never thought you’d be so shameless. “This is what you owe her!” He never knew that I was the one who saved him in that avalanche. So, I died in agony, my love carved out of me—literally. When my eyes opened again, I found myself back on the night he was drunk.

WOKE UP SERIES: BOOK II I’ve been wishing to see the world end… but why do I felt this way now I see it for myself? Running as if my life depends on it, every alley and corner I turned into, I tried my best not to slip and get caught. Hah, it seems like I would pass out due to exhaustion any time soon! Never once in my life did I run away like this! Damn it! With this fat body of mine, surely there is no hope! How can a shut in person like me can even do running in laps. I thought that I was strong a while ago but it seems like I was just over reacting. Dang 'No no no noooo they will catch up on me shit!' Why did I even come in this situation in the first place!? What hell!! . . . [Day 1 Quest: Would you like to see it?]

"Sierraaaaa… oh sieerrrraaa… where are you??? Enough of your hide and seek already. You should come out so we will play my favorite game." I heard that masculine voice again and I froze into my place. I looked at the girl who had saved me. She was shivering with fear. "No, he is here. We need to hide. If he sought us, he would play his games again. We need to hide." She whispered and jumped inside the tree. The log of the tree was very big. And with the big hole, Sierra was able to hide inside its log. I also jumped into the tree and hid myself from that devil. His voice was more scary than the demons. I have not seen his face ever. But I could imagine his demonic face with the scary voice he had. "Don't worry, Sierra. The angels are coming. They will rescue you."

When I was two months pregnant, the Alpha, Lucas, asked me to give blood to his childhood friend. She pretended to have been injected with wolfsbane by a rogue werewolf and required the Luna's blood to recover. “Jessica, your physical constitution is good; hurry and give Lilith a blood transfusion!” “A real Luna wouldn’t just stand by and watch her die!” Lucas and his friends pushed me into the operating room. “It’s just a blood transfusion; it won’t harm the fetus. Even if we lose it, we can have another, but Lilith must survive.” I gave up struggling, watching my blood being drawn and transferred into Lilith's body. After waking up, I dragged myself home, only to be pushed to the ground by Lucas. I ended up with a miscarriage. That was the moment I decided to give up on this relationship.

How can I even begin to explain this to my supposed mate? My name is Nicole, but to survive, I’ve been living as a man. When I returned to my pack, I discovered that everyone I cared about had been killed. The one responsible? King Derek. Forced to flee, I disguised myself as a boy and ended up in his pack. He never suspected a thing. Now, I’m stuck maintaining this facade while I try to uncover why he destroyed my pack. On my 18th birthday, he realized I was his mate—believing I was a guy—and rejected me instantly. By the time he learned who I really was, I had already found a second-chance mate. Fate says I’m destined to end his misfortunes, but how can I help the one who caused me so much suffering?

Leaving my birth home seemed like the most difficult decision until I have to adapt as the Alpha of a Pack I know nothing about. When erroneous and jeopardizing choices streaks into the Pack, it seems as if a mass of perilous bombs revolves around the Sphere. My life is taking a bad turn and Phyllis does not give me a moment of slack. She wants to groom a strong, defensive Alpha and I see all her effort crashing when my Mate dies. Yet in the heart of these inevitable occurrences, not only do I find myself flanked by my mating bond and the gripping snare of a furtive woman. I also realize that I am wedged between the plights of a reincarnated Mephistophelean searching for his rebirthed lover and a savage witch striving to rouse her Queen from an infinity curse. Caveat: Detailed smut scene, flecks of same-sex smut~