Insulting Pick Up Lines Novels & Stories

I was flirting and the words bounced from my lips smoothly like butter. “And how many girls have you used that pick-up line on Kade?” “You, feel free to tell me if it’s working or if I need to up my game” Good God, I sounded like a sordid suitor trying to get in a woman’s pants after the first kiss. And that’s the fucking thing, I hadn’t even kissed her yet and I was this whipped. “Ooh you need to up your game buddy, where I come from men have better game than you”, she was teasing but I growled.

The worst chat up line in history. That was the instant I threw a shoe at him. And found him adorable. He dropped to his knees, hands in the air, and exclaimed, “I’m so sorry! Shit! When I get nervous, I say the most inappropriate...Shit! How am I meant to talk sense when you look like that?” “Like what?” “A beautiful, hopefully very forgiving Goddess! Let me start over? No more shoes?” Stood in the room, my arms folded, another shoe of Cass’s ready to launch at him I’d not succumbed.

“Ugh, who is this ugly bitch talking to?” “You’re a gremlin. Or maybe just a slut.” “You stutter so much… Maybe your mouth’s only good for sucking dick.” …I’m not so thick-skinned that their insults don’t hurt. They’ve been getting rather creative, and the fact they circle around me, corner me, always makes my back itch. But I’m still motivated. I won’t let them ruin my paradise, especially not for anyone else. “If you…continue. Uhm.” Huff. Breathe. “If you continue…t-this, we…we will have to call someone to remove you.”

I could not help but insult her even the person in subject could not hear me. "Do you know that the skin tone around your forehead and neck are different in shades? Some of your eyeliners are smudge. Your lipstick is too thick. Your makeup doesn't even look good on you. You could only pass as a low-class prostitute. No, even prostitutes have beauty to sell. What yours then?" I suddenly got an idea, the best insulter of the year. I turned to Lucas, "Lucas, do you find her in your liking?" As expected Lucas made a face of disgust. "No way. She is too ugly."

Her question broke the tranquil silence, and I couldn't help but chuckle softly. "Yeah," I replied, my breath gently brushing against her back. "Couldn't wait to be in the presence of the amazing chef who insists on making every day special." She smiled, her shoulder shook with my small compliment, as she turned around, letting our eyes met, "You're becoming very good with your pick-up lines these days Mr., I'm very impressed."- She spoke, as she threw her arms around my shoulder, grinded slyly. "Pick up lines? I never had to use these stupid pick up lines on another since my interest were never on another woman except my woman who is staring at me with all love in her eyes."

“Oh, I’m sorry, are you trying to make me fall for you? Is that what this is?” I burst out laughing and rolled my eyes. “If it’s really not obvious then I’mgoing6 to have to bring back the pick-up lines.” “You like those lines, huh? Do they work for you a lot?” she asked, taking a sip of her wine as the waitress set it on the table. I nodded in answer. “Usually they never fail. You’re really denting my ego here, cupcake. Maybe you should cut me a little slack.” “Hmm, I don’t think so. Where would be the fun in that? You know you love me rejecting you.” She narrowed her eyes at me playfully as she leant back in her chair and studied her menu.

I know he's Chase, one of the 'populars', so why is he talking to me? "What do you want?" I said harshly, but I don't think he got that I didn't want to talk to him because he just smiled flirtatiously at me. "Someone better call God, because I think he lost an Angel." he smirks at me. I give him a straight face. That's the worst pick up line ever. "No someone better call the devil because I escaped from hell." I said sarcastically "Hey baby girl what's your code."he asked

My laughter filled the air of the restaurant. “All right, let’s hear your best pickup line. Impress me with your smooth-talking skills.” I told him as he grinned, his eyes gleaming with determination. “All right, here goes.” He spoke before clearing his voice and looking at me with puppy eyes. “Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.” I burst into laughter, my hand covering my mouth to stifle the sound. “Oh God, that was cheesy! But I have to admit, it did bring a smile to my face.” I laughed as Caleb bowed his head in mock defeat.

It is obvious why he came and it annoyed me that he will do it knowing that she is with me. “Have we met before?” I scoffed inside at his cliche pick up line. Dude a teenager can do better than this. “I don’t think so,” Kamaria said politely and turned away from the guy to speak to me, effectively dismissing him but he wouldn’t take the hint. He tapped Kamaria on the shoulder to get her attention. “Don’t be like that baby, why don’t you give me your number and we can talk more over a glance of wine, and may be something more,” he flashed her a charming grin that I am sure has gotten him into a lot of girls pants.

I use air quotes emphasizing pet names. "Oh did she sweetheart?" his smirk gets bigger. "Do I need to file another complaint or will you stop acting like a child?" "I don't think that is the proper tone when speaking to your boss" Nayel grins showing off his white perfect teeth. "You're unbelievable" I mumble flickers of amusement light up in his eyes at my irritated huff.