Orphan Dark Humor Jokes Novels & Stories

I needed to know I’m not gonna die today. “You already suggested dying,” he jumped over a tree trunk and continued his journey, not staring to the sides for even a second. “Are you kidding me? That was a…was…that was some kind of joke.” “Mine too,” he scoffed. “Dark humor girly huh,” he stopped and stared down at me. “As much as you like dark humor, trust me, you don’t want to be here when it gets dark.” He turned around and walked away, “Better keep up.”

"Yes, I did. Now could you do me a favor and throw more light on the subject." "You are doing it again," Goodness laughed. "What am I doing again?" "You are telling me to throw more light on the subject." "And what is strange about telling a friend to throw more light on a subject that he brought up?" "So, you don't know what is funny in your statement?" "I honestly don't know what is funny in my statement. I am as confused as a hawk who found out about week ago that he has been stalking the grave where his dead mother was laid to rest."

“Now. The laugh. I heard you yesterday, when you thought no one was listening. It’s too high.” He stopped in front of me, tapping his own chest. “Elion’s was deeper. From here.” The gesture was intimate. Unexpected. I flinched. His jaw tightened instantly. “Try again,” he said. “I’ll tell you a joke. It’s a terrible one. Elion hated it.” He told it anyway... something painfully unfunny involving a squirrel and a priest. I forced out a weak chuckle, the sound thin and hollow. “No.” The word cracked like a whip.

I could literally die if I fuck up more than I’ve been doing…but, I can’t tell him that. “I’m here, okay? No matter what, you have me.” He looks me right in the eye, assuring me tenderly with a smile this time. “But damn, you really do look like shit right now, and when was the last time you used deodorant?” His unconventional joke in my time of sadness makes me break into laughter. It wasn’t funny but it was whatever it was and it makes me laugh. I just needed to laugh. It rolls out of me effortlessly, like everything was with Adam. While I choke on my saliva, he watches me, amused for the duration of my chuckling.

he charged. The old man was piqued. "You filthy dog". he scorned. "At least none of my children have been arrested for robbing four different banks". He expected a further attack from the man but, to his consternation, the other drinker roared with laughter, clutching his belly, and flinging his arms and feet wildly in the air. "Look who is talking. At least mine is talented". And he grabbed his belly again, infecting others with his laughter. "Have you also heard of any of my daughters staying with a rich man, only to be faced with the prospect of getting sent back for having cheated.*

Each table was surrounded by several people, piled high with cash and chips. This wasn't futures trading at all—this was an underground casino! "Ethan, let me introduce you." Noah led me toward a middle-aged man. "This is Mr. Somner, the owner here." Mr. Somner looked to be in his 40s, dressed in an expensive suit, his eyes cold. "So, this is your classmate, Mr. Grant?" Mr. Somner asked, sizing me up. "I heard you're very smart. The state's top scorer for this year's SAT, right?"

I deflected it with my hand, and the ornament grazed me. Diane was spared from the hit, but the ornament sliced my arm open, and blood flowed like a river. Smug, Zack stepped ahead. Arrogantly, he announced, "I'm the future co-owner of this villa and Ms. Sampson's boyfriend. Your precious Felix is going to get kicked out of this place, you hag!" My in-laws were shocked. Words failed them. They couldn't believe the daughter they were so proud of would do something so… filthy and immoral.

The laughter wasn't because it was a fun memory full of unending joy or happiness. It just reminded me of how much hatred Olivia harbored for me. Being an orphan, It was the kind of laughter that came from the realization that I had no one for me in the whole world. The people who should have had my back, saw me as a tool. As for the ones who did, they were long dead.

I don't want him to think that I'm on his side or that I agree with her twisted plans. “It's not like we did well getting to know our parents either, huh?" he laughs bitterly, "everyone thinks that we orphans will end up in jail one day, but this is ridiculous," he jokes. "That's right," I agree, "ridiculous in the most disturbed and miserable way."

Although it was not on record that he killed, murdered, raped or extorted anyone unjustly, but if anyone offends him so much that he says to his followers, ‘no mercy’ then the person would be rendered useless for life whichever way he chooses. He was simply naughty and mischievous by nature. Vera snatched her hand from his grip, which he had grabbed mid-air and spitting out some funny words to him “you dare not touch me now, if you do, Martins will deal with you.” Rohan had never heard such a funny joke in his entire life. Of all the people who can deal with him was Martins. It was the joke of the century; it was so funny to him that he laughed out so hard that his assistant Omar who was on