Orphan Jokes Dark Humor Novels & Stories

*yuck* I know a lot of the girls have suffered the same things at the hands of the same boys, and we always silently rejoiced when someone was adopted out, or aged out. When you turn 19, you aged out, and sadly must leave. I am almost there excited to age out, and terrified at the same time. I have no where to go. But I will start this new chapter with a smile on my face and my head held high as I survived my time at the orphanage! Only because of my special spot, and animal friend.

She may have a bit of stubborn and brat bones in her body. "You could have made it last time too if Lilith didn't made a total worthless joke about breathing in hell which had Grace laughing like a fool ." Emily scoffs remembering their stupidity that night. "It was funny though" Grace defends herself,It's not her fault that she finds stupid nerd jokes funny.

No sane group, bar a cult, would dress an unconscious woman in a wedding dress. I shook my head; it could be a joke: such horrendous pranks were popular these days. Though it is giving me creeps to not see a single familiar moron, it doesn't really bother me as I believe nothing horribly wrong can happen that hasn't already happened tonight. This is just a sick joke. It should be...

I joked lightly, and Serin rolled his eyes at my poor excuse of one. "Funny," he said humorlessly. I only cackled even harder. "No, seriously. You should step out of the corporate world and become a comedian with jokes like that." "Aw, come on, Serin." I followed him out of the house and into the backyard, where he walked out for some fresh air. "It was kind of funny, admit it!" "You need to admit yourself into a mental hospital with jokes like that." ###

“First of all, awesome, I’d love to know what’s in there. Second, this is the biggest floor asshole I’ve ever seen in my entire life. Is this an actual butt or is it one of those hella large worm caves I’ve seen in horror movies?” There’s silence for a longer while until the person starts laughing. “In all my centuries, I’ve never heard anyone address the void of souls as floor asshole. You got jokes, that much I can give you.” Grinning, I finally turn around and take a step to the side, careful not to be spartan kicked into the hole, in case I manage to annoy the guy or press the wrong buttons.

The man who created the joke was Nate Brighton. “No wonder I’ve smelled something disgusting, there is trash here apparently,” Nate sneered, followed by the laughter of his two friends. “Hey, did you forget to tell your clerk to clean,” his blonde friend sneered . “Hmm, they cleaned up earlier, but the trash show up again,” Nate explained. “Looks like your luxury car collection is very shiny and makes a hobo seem enchanted,” his long-haired friend said. “Nate, I think you need to be generous with him. Just give a little of your money to that beggar!” Nate’s friend exclaimed and mocking Nicko.

“Why would I change when you’ll never stop trying to earn a joke from every situation?” “Isn’t life more fun with jokes? Something to laugh about once in a while. You know, it makes the world beautiful and fun when it’s dark. Studies even say laughter heals faster than herbs do. Lowers pain, strengthens the heart, clears the head. Makes the blood flow freer. In short — that’s why I’m looking younger and living longer. Which of those old people in the pack is as old as me, uh? None. I’m the oldest.”

0 Here’s hoping his d**k falls off Shit happens, but not usually this bad. Were the Oracles smoking crack?? This has 2 B illegal. We don’t know there fucking. Maybe its strikly oral. Bring back monkey slavery “OK,” I said, clicking off the site. “We get the point.” “It’s the same thing, though,” Zane said. “They’re still just showing off to each other, this time to show who can be the most foul.”

A childhood visual of the old witch from the library Hansel and Gretel book pops into my head and only increases the giggles I exude. “I hope not, I’m barely grown, and she might add me to tonight’s menu. I’m too big for an oven!” I point out between snorts of stupid laughter and Meadow caves and starts giggling too, lightening our whole mood. I guess the tension and the heavy weight of this journey has us strung out enough, that even a lame joke like this has enough power to break the strings and have us erupt. It’s needed, between us, this bonding over awful jokes.

The silence stretched out, thick and uncomfortable, until Frank tried to break it with that awkward little half-smile he got when he was desperate not to let things fall apart. "Well," he said, his tone light but forced, "at least we know why my uncle was such a jerk to me growing up. Guess he was just getting in practice for the whole ’blackmail a murderer’ phase." The joke landed like a damp towel, flat, a bit pathetic, yet somehow just what we needed. A small, broken laugh slipped out before I could stop it, followed by Rowan huffing out something that might have been a chuckle if it didn’t sound so painful.