Peanuts Joke Novels & Stories

haha…he missed school for a week…”, William uttered amidst his loud laughter. Grandma and Jake’s laughter filled the garden, “true-true-that is so true! I remember very well, he didn’t tell the family that was what happened but put the blame on innocent George for giving food containing peanut butter…. Not only was his eyes swallow till it disappeared, his lips was so big that you’d think he had fillers…hahahahaha… ohh gosh my stomach…”

I AM A QUEEN. Will_the_devil WOW. PEASANTS DREAM BIG. I_pooped ONCE AGAIN, THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A PEASANT. Will_the_devil WELL...WHO WILL BELIEVE THAT AFTER MEETING YOU? EVERYTHING IS WRONG WITH YOU. I_pooped YOU TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF, BUDDY? Cereal_killer Um...who else feels like they are watching PDA? I_love_my_mommy Me! Yes_you_suck

Some people get really into Faulkner. I’d heard it before. Not that line. But the tone. The joke that wasn’t a joke. The laugh that carried too far. The way a room could tilt against you without anyone saying your name. Freshman year, there was a kid named Paul who wore skinny jeans and knew all the words to every Tori Amos song. He got cornered behind the gym one afternoon. Just a bruise on the jaw and a cracked phone screen. Nothing major, they said. Nothing to make a fuss about.

someone yelled. "I won’t shut up until someone answers!" Lucas shouted back, clearly enjoying the attention. "We don’t know and we don’t care, so shut the hell up, Lucas!" another voice barked. "Wrong! It’s called Lemon-aid! Get it? Like the drink?" The groan this time was even louder. "Dad jokes are never, ever funny," Elodie muttered, shaking her head.

“You were young. No need to beat up yourself over it.” Eva set the chips aside. "I've never told anyone this before." She reached for a packet of peanuts tearing it open. "You ever try these two together?" she asked with a playful glint while grabbing a chocolate bar. "The peanuts and chips?" She laughed. "No, silly. Chocolate and peanuts. It's one of my comfort food combos." She took a bite of the chocolate, popped a few peanuts into her mouth, and let out a satisfied sigh. "Perfect."

James rolled his eyes. “Biggies for labour prefects.” Gina smiled. “Sure bet.” Ella hyped as we all laughed. “Maybe Joe for assistants ass prefect.” Tj joked and we all laughed about it. “Can these tests just end, my brain feels punctured.” I complained. “Pele(sorry) o, flat tyre brain.” James teased grabbing his sandwich and making a run for it, clearly knowing what was coming next and I dropped my fork hastily as I chased after him, our friends and Nuel laughing so hard as the tried to call us back, much to the entertainment of the other students present in the cafeteria.

“You don’t wanna be best buds with arachno-face? Jeff clutched his arm and dug his foot in the ground, trying to breathe quietly. God, it hurts! There was a brief silence, then the kid who wasn’t Preston spoke. “Cut it out!” His voice cracked on a high note. “Keep your dick pointed at your own urinal, man.” “Dude, I’m just messing with you. Don’t get your panties twisted.” Preston’s snort echoed off the walls. “And speaking of aardvarks, what’s with your dick, man? It looks like an anteater.”

Sure enough, Adrian closed his mouth. "Darling, then I will tell you a joke. There was a toothpick that was walking along the road. Just then, it saw a hedgehog running past the middle of the road, and then it shouted something at the hedgehog. Guess what it shouted? Yes, it is called the hedgehog 'bus'!! Haha, it's funny, isn't it?" RK felt that listening to Adrian's jokes would make him want to sleep even more than listening to him recite poems. This guy couldn't even tell a good joke. What was the meaning of telling a joke that everyone already knew? Would Stella laugh? What a childish kid.

I'm not really sure what to do, but I want her to feel better before she leaves here. "Hey, can I ask you something?" I say. She nods and takes a sip of her drink. "Do trees poop?" I ask and she nearly chokes on her coffee before giving me a curious look. "What?" She asks. "Do trees poop?" I repeat and she chuckles a little. "Um... No?" She asks rather than states. "Of course they do. How else would we get number two pencils?" I say. When my joke lands she tilts her head back to laugh, shaking her head as she looks at me.

"Even as a joke, that kind of attitude isn't funny nowadays. You have to stay strong. Felicia, you've survived the zombie apocalypse. A few mouthfuls of peas should be no problem." For some reason, we all giggle at Daisy's unexpected joke about peas, and I'm not really sure why. The other three girls don't seem to know why we're smiling, but none of us seems to care. When we all stop laughing, I look back down at my tray, but something at the table catches my attention, and I look back up.