Ugly Jokes Novels & Stories

Heavy with shit we weren’t saying. I cleared my throat. “Alright. That’s enough depressing hospital talk. You know what would really make my day better?” He glanced at me, brows raised. “A really dumb joke.” Andrew blinked. Then tilted his head a little, lips twitching like he was fighting a smile. “A dumb joke?” I nodded, lips curving around the cigarette still hanging from my mouth. “Come on. Hit me.” He gave me a look—half skeptical, half amused. “Fine. What do you call a sad strawberry?”

“Because it makes you laugh?” He clicked his tongue, a smile on his face. “You finally get it.” I rolled my eyes. “But ONLY you does it make laugh. Real jokes are so funny everyone around would burst into laughter, not them crying while you’re having a blast.” “A joke is a joke.” “…Your sense of humor is rotten,” I ended up muttering, hissing as his rough fingers tugged at the bandage wrapped around my ribs. The cloth peeled away sticky and damp, and the stench of dried blood hit my nose. I fought the urge to gag.

"Did you know the cockroach is the most handsome creature in the world?" "Why?" - Shin. "Because, just when the cockroach walks, someone is already screaming and, when it lands on you, they still thrilled it with a jump-Aahh!" I shouted, then stood up. "Hahaha... you're right, your joke about the cockroach is funny-hahaha ..." Supposing that Shin threw a cockroach at me, I was surprised and stood up. "Shut up!" I said, in irritation. "Okay! Okay! I will stop, but that joke of yours isn't good. Aren't there any more funny jokes?"

A message bubble lit up under his name, cheerful and oblivious. Just another one of his dry, stupid jokes—something about his dinner being so terrible he was convinced the restaurant was trying to assassinate him with undercooked chicken. He'd probably attached one of those ridiculous GIFs he was always finding, something animated and silly that was meant to make me laugh.

Joe’s eyes bulged, his brows furrowing in pure rage, but his hands moved against his will, rubbing moose excrement into his own face. “You know what Gigi told me?” I said conversationally, turning to Nikolai. “She saw on TikTok that some men don’t wash their asses.” I tutted at Joe. “We can’t have that. Rub your ass in that shit, bro. Get it between the cheeks.” Joe looked like he was about to slaughter us, but he was powerless as he rolled his ass in the dung, grinding into it like he had the world’s itchiest bottom. At this point, Nikolai and I were crying with laughter, struggling to breathe as we doubled over, barely able to steal glances at each other without completely losing it again.

Christmas wiggled an eyebrow while crunching his nose as if he's smelling something awful. "Yes, 21 wives without any children with them. A dozen times larger number of sex clubs in North and South America more than his home country, which sounded so bullsh*t. Smells like a month old rotten egg that you can smell from miles away and looks like a f*cking witch monkey from his long grown burnt beard and long frizzy hair. Who wouldn't know such a man?" His mean manner of explaining the looks of Mr. Raji made Mr. Christmas laugh so hard and would almost fart from sucking so much air. The elevator dings and the doors flew open. "You are really funny, K. But try not to make Mr. Raji hear that or t

I won't blame him though, James is too smart and exposed to be almost four. "Hey, sucker," James calls out to Max, so his attention will be adverted away from me. "Too bad Ugly begins with 'U." He sticks his tongue out at Max, and waves his fingers mockingly behind his ears. I can no longer control my laughter, I set the iron up and press my back against the wall, bubbling with laughter. "At least I'm not Mr smelly." "Hey, I don't smell dwat bad." James seems offended for the first time.

Hello, My name is Jane, and between my sister and me, I am the ugly one. And no, I am not an insecure bitch who likes to complain about my looks all the time. My sister Liliana is blessed with beautiful genes. She had long flowing blonde hair with bright blue eyes and pink lips that remind you of delicate flower petals.

He laughed, maniacally, "Fiesty. And you know what? I like fiesty girls." I laughed in response, clutching my stomach, "Haha! You and a girl? Nobody would want an ugly as* like you!" He was suddenly angry, "Ugly @ss and mine? Yours is uglier!" I couldn't control my laughter at this, causing it to burst out. Gosh! This man has the mind worse than a child. "Dude, you seriously need to get yourself checked. And please go get yourself some better comebacks!" "You bit*h! Why you laughing?" he shouted, enraged, tightening his grip on my arm.

Making Alex stutter. "Uhm... that's not it, honey. I mean, you're pretty and cute like winny the pooh." "Winny the pooh is a boy. Not pretty! You have a heart. Back when I was slim and pretty, you complimented me every day. Now that I'm a little fatter, you say I'm Winny the Pooh. Well, from now on you don't have to tease me anymore. There are many beautiful women out there who are slim."