Your So Ugly Jokes Novels & Stories

he added, glaring straight at me, “stop spreading lies about what never happened before I make you regret.” He turned and stormed out. The silence didn't last long. They all began to laugh, even much louder this time. A crumpled paper hit my shoulder. “You heard him,” a guy said. “You are so pathetic and ugly.” I couldn't say a word to defend myself. Susan appeared like a storm. “ Even if it's true, so what? What's your business?” she snapped, glaring at everyone. I don't know if I should feel better or not because of her actions. I'm already ashamed of myself.

"Somewhere out there is a tree, tirelessly producing oxygen so you can breathe. I think you owe it an apology." "Why don't you slip into something comfortable, like a coma." "Shock me, say something intelligent." "You are so fat when you wear a yellow coat, people scream 'taxi'" "Why don't you shut up and give that hole in your face a chance to heal." "You so ugly when who were born the doctor threw you out the window and the window threw you back!" "Fine! I quit, you win. Anyhow, we are going for some ice cream." Jake, at last, commits to his failure.

“These bad boys were made for making pastries-not serving hoity-toity ass holes.” I chuckled. “You sure have an optimistic way of looking at things.” I chuckled. “You sure have an optimistic way of looking at things.” “Why shouldn’t I? Today was a win, if you ask me. You managed to spill a drink on that pompous CEO, and we walked away with fifty thousand dollars when we were only contracted for ten.” She scoffed playfully. “Maybe I should get you to spill drinks on jerks more often.” We shared a laugh, but her amusement was far more genuine than mine as I could still feel the sting of humiliation from earlier.

“They deify you, and you are a devil.” “Yes, of course, of the worst kind, and I don't think I'm unattainable or that I have it in gold. I remember a saying of my grandfather's that says ´both the pretty and the ugly also poop and pee.”. “Lol is a very funny friend, but that doesn't mean that you have to go around the street like a hunter looking for a prey that satisfies your crazy desires, and besides, the poor guy would surely fall in love, and you would throw him away after a week, like you do with everyone else.”

an ''he stuttered already pulling down his pants'' I opened his filthy boxer And before he knew it, i already pepper sprayed his d**k and his eyes I took to my heels as his loud screams echoed through the alley ''Hey don't look at me like that, i did say he'll cry'' That'll teach him never to mess with me again This is what i should have done to mr ugly Stupid handsome man!! Gosh isabelle stop saying his handsome, he's Ugly! Ugly!

I asked, "So, Miss. How is it going with the Dark humour guy? Any update so far?" "HA! Dark humour! He's the funniest guy, I've ever met. Didn't you hear that line of him? I mean he called himself motherfucker; oh my, that's the kind of humour I love. Every time he cracks a joke, it makes me head over heels for him. And not forget his awkwardness around girls" the sarcasm was dripping from her mouth. But that changed my mood. And we both started chuckling, "He's not that bad!" I exclaimed. Right? He's not that bad.

" Ugly mannequin " " Have you ever seen one? " He asks with a sneer on his face " Try melting one and you'll know " " Idiot " he mutter standing up straight. " Just wanted to tell you that I'd odered food and it's already in the sitting room so if you like starve and if you like don't starve. I don't care what happens to you either " " You know something? I wanted to tell you that you'd finally had sense but you just had to spoil somehow. Can't blame you any ways it's just not my fault you're like that "

I did everything according to that video I saw online, then how do it taste so bad. I shift my gaze to ugly, she's laughing her guts out. I take the soup and stand up. "I... I..." Fuck! Since when do I start stuttering. "I'll go prepare a better one" then I walk out of the room as if my pants is on fire. "Please make sure you don't poison me to death this time!" Ugly called after me. I step out and lock the door from outside. I can't have her coming to the kitchen to laugh at me again.

no reason even after it looked like they just showered.” The bigger one said as they all laughed. “I mean really how is it possible that you come out the shower with soap in your ears, and you still stink?” The smaller one said as she gagged. As the other two laughed so hard they were starting to cry and the middle one had the loud laugh like a banshee. It was contagious because I found myself chuckling at them. “Hey, can I borrow your ketchup bottle?” The smaller one asked me. “Yea, sure.” I answered handing her the bottle from my table. “Thank you, and I want to apologize for my loud ass cousin they have no home training. I know you couldn’t study in peace with Shawna laughing like a

Why call me nerd every damn time ? I hated that word !! “None of your damn business, dumb fvck,” I replied, the anger coming from somewhere else. He smelt like oh gawd, did he sleep with the entire female university population here ? “Wow, you called me dumb. That is the joke of the century,” Lex laughed out loud while slapping his knee dramatically. Drama Queen, ughh !