Yo Mamma Jokes

Tres meses después de que mi esposo, Josiah Erikson, desapareciera en un accidente de esquí, lo vi en un bar. Él reía a carcajada limpia, con un brazo envuelto naturalmente alrededor de los hombros de su «mejor amiga», Mónica Jones. —Menos mal que se les ocurrió esta idea. Casi había olvidado cómo se siente la libertad. Uno tras otro, sus amigos chocan sus copas con él y le preguntan cuándo planea reaparecer. Bajó la mirada y lo pensó antes de decir: —En una semana. Apareceré cuando ella se haya vuelto completamente loca buscándome. De pie entre las sombras, lo vi saborear su libertad, y entonces llamé a mi amiga que trabaja en la oficina estatal de registros civiles.

Una semana antes de nuestra Ceremonia de Marcaje, en la fiesta de un amigo de Ethan Stormwind, le dije que quería romper con él. Al escucharme, todos se rieron, pues sabían que durante los últimos seis años, mi objetivo en la vida había sido convertirme en su Luna. ¿Por qué querría romper con él si solo faltaba una semana para la ceremonia? Incluso Ethan pensó que estaba siendo irrazonable, y me cuestionó: —¿Solo porque el día de nuestra ceremonia tengo que llevar a Selene al curandero para que le hagan una revisión, estás haciendo un berrinche y quieres romper conmigo? Después de una breve pausa añadió: —Los dos somos adultos, ¿puedes comportarte de manera más madura? Podrías reprogramar la ceremonia. ¿Por qué insistes en ese día en particular? No tengo tiempo para tus escenas de celos. Asentí en silencio. Sí, algo tenía que cambiar, pero no era la fecha de la ceremonia, sino él. Yo iba a aceptar ser marcada por alguien más.

Amar a Gabriel Morales era un secreto inconfesable. Porque Gabriel no era cualquier hombre: era el tío de Camila Flores. Ella era la rosa que él había cultivado con ternura… y él era el amor que ella no podía nombrar en voz alta.

Trixxie Angeles. Gusto lang niyang paghiwalayan ang kapatid at ang hipag pero nag-backfire ang plano niya. Nagbunga ang isang gabibf pinagsaluhan nila ni Gavin. Gavin Mendez. Isang lalaking malikot sa babae ngunit nagkagusto sa babaeng may asawa na. Ano ang kaya niyang isakripisyo sa ngalan ng pag-ibig? Dumaan ang limang taon at kailangan niyang makipagkita sa lalaking nilinlang niya para sa kapakanan ng kanyang anak na may sakit. Ano ang kaya niyang ibigay sa lalaking minsan na siyang sinabihan na walang iibig sa kanya?

Suplada Ako, Pero Hindi Ko Sinasadyang Mahulog Sa’yo Si April Ivy Lozano ay eksperta sa pagiging suplada—may mga mata na kayang patayin ka sa isang tingin at mga salita na kayang magpawala ng gana kahit sa pinakamagaling na manliligaw. Sa kabilang banda, si Dominick Elite ay isang professional bolero—flirt sa lahat, charm sa lahat, at walang balak sa kahit anong seryosong relasyon. Para kay April Ivy , si Dominick ay parang virus: nakakaaliw pero dapat iwasan. Pero paano kung sa bawat biro, bawat pa-flirt na linya, at bawat “oops, hindi ko sinasadya” moment, unti-unti niyang natutuklasan… nahuhulog na pala siya sa isang bolero?

During my night shift, I refused to help my adopted sister administer fluids to her patient. After the wrong drug is given, I watch a seven-year-old boy die after he suffers an allergic reaction right before my eyes. In my previous life, the boy's family stormed the nurses' station after I'd just finished administering his IV medication. The next thing I knew, I was violently beaten up. "You poisoned my grandchild by giving him the wrong medicine!" But the fluid I introduced into his bloodstream was a simple glucose solution. It couldn't have led to such a disastrous outcome. When I was on the brink of passing out, someone called the police. I thought help had finally arrived, but I was sorely mistaken. The police officer—my brother—pinned me to the ground. "We found your prints on the drug vial. You're a murderer." Then, my childhood friend, a forensic pathologist, held up an autopsy report and accused me of the same crime. "The patient's time of death is around 5:00 am. That's the same time you administered drugs into his system." Unable to prove my innocence, I was ultimately beaten to death by the boy's enraged family members. My brother and my childhood friend had always loved me. Even on the brink of death, I couldn't understand why they would do this to me. Now, I open my eyes and find myself back on the night it all began.

Freya Laurent returns to the Blackwood Pack after five years, eager to reunite with her adoptive family. But the moment Alpha Dane, the man who's been her protective brother since childhood sees her, his wolf claims her as his fated mate. ‎ ‎Caught between duty and desire, Dane fights his primal urges while Freya struggles with dreams and an inexplicable pull toward the one man she shouldn't want. When jealous warrior Selene allies with rival Alpha Viktor, their attacks awaken ancient powers within Freya. ‎ ‎She's not just human. She's the Moon Goddess's last descendant, and everyone wants her power. ‎ ‎Can love conquer blood? Or will destiny destroy them both?

Rasa khawatir, takut, sedih, dan amarah adalah bagian dari hidup. Semua orang memiliki bagian dan porsinya masing-masing, tetapi ... coba bayangkan jika hidupmu berada di posisi terburuk dari setiap kehidupan. Seperti yang tengah dialami Luna. Wanita berusia dua puluh lima tahun ini tengah berjuang menghadapi hal terburuk yang pernah ia alami. Berlari, bersembunyi, dan menghilang, mengantarkannya pada sebuah cinta dan mimpi yang baru. Namun, perang melawan diri sendiri tidak pernah usai baginya. Apakah semesta memang sekejam ini pada semua orang?

For seven years, I had been the secret of Enzo Gallo, the new Don of the Gallo family. When I went to register our son Lucas's birth, I discovered Enzo had already married his sister-in-law, Camilla, and claimed her child as his own. Her child became the heir to the family, with all the privileges that entailed. My child became a shameful bastard. Years ago, after Enzo's brother died, the family elders gave Enzo one condition to become Don: he had to have an heir with his sister-in-law to secure the Gallo bloodline. That night, Enzo held me close and swore I was his only true wife. He promised that once Camilla gave birth, he would give me the wedding I deserved. But he missed Lucas's birthday the day Camilla went into labor. Instead of the wedding he promised me, all I got was the news of his marriage to his sister-in-law. My son gently wiped away my tears with his small hand: "Mamma, don't be sad. I changed my birthday wish. I don't want a Papa anymore." "I don't care about being an heir. Having you is enough." I pulled Lucas into my arms, swallowing the bitterness that rose in my throat. "Who says you aren't an heir? Baby, Mamma is taking you home. To our family." What Enzo doesn't know is that I am the only daughter of the most powerful Mafia family in Sicily. I never cared about being the Donna of the Gallo family.

Everyone knows that the mafia Don's only son, Antonio Gatti, gets to choose a completely new mistress of his own once every three months. Women who are in dire need of money and have no other option left in life will flock to Antonio's wife, Martina Russo, to apply for the position. If they get to spend a night with Antonio, they'll receive a million dollars. Those who are capable of giving birth to his heir will receive half of his family fortune. There are so many women who want to latch onto Antonio as their ticket to wealth. As for me, Martina, I become the hottest piece of gossip in the entire mafia underworld. "Just what sort of lethal leverage does the Gatti family have over Martina to the point that she can tolerate her husband's whims to this degree?" Everyone is very sure that I will submit to the Gatti family's influence and live a humiliating life for as long as I draw breath. That is, until Antonio brings a young woman named Camilla Ferrara home one day. Camilla is an ordinary woman, and yet she's capable of transforming Antonio, a cold-blooded and violent man, into a completely different person. He gets rid of all his other mistresses for her sake. He cleanses every inch of himself three whole times because she claims that he's filthy. Antonio has become obsessed with Camilla. He tells me, "Camilla is a pure and innocent angel; unlike you, whose hands are completely stained with filthy blood. Your heart is as dirty as the rest of you." He seems to have forgotten that I've done those filthy things just so I can get rid of all the obstacles in his way in order to protect the Gatti family's legacy. On the day Mamma passed away from her illness, Antonio prepared a huge fireworks show that's capable of lighting up the entire sky above New Wis City just to celebrate Camilla's birthday. After that, I find out that Antonio has the gall to dump my mamma's ashes into the fireworks assembly on Camilla's birthday. They end up combusting alongside the rest of the fireworks that night. I toss the divorce agreement in his face with all my might. At the same time, I unlatch the safety on the pistol that's hidden in my sleeve before pointing it at him and Camilla. "I'm giving you two choices right now. Option one—sign the divorce agreement and file for a divorce with me, which entitles me to half of the Gatti family's fortune. Option two—die together with your beloved mistress so that you can go to hell and apologize to Mamma there."