Your Momma Jokes Novels & Stories

I said hugging her tightly. They started making plans how to torture my husband and I think I am going to enjoy this. "Oh common guys I am hungry," I said smiling. "You won't eat this time right," Mumma asked suspiciously making me blush. "Don't tell me I am going to be Grandma," My mother-in-law joked looking at me and I nodded my head making them squeal in surprise. Both mothers started jumping like school girls making me irritate. Why I have to be in this alien family?

She waved her hand lightly, the diamonds on her fingers catching the light. “Oh, heavens, don’t look so grim. It was nothing,” she said. “It’s an old joke, that’s all. You know how people say boys can be too much like being wild and dramatic, and how it is exhausting to be a boy mom. So the joke is about how a mother knows she needs so much help to raise them. It’s just something the older generation repeats. Nothing serious.” Her gaze shifted amongst the crowd. “Don’t tell me you don’t know it.”

She leaned forward and wrapped her wrists around my neck. “I was thinking about the time you climbed up my window and dad was away on business. So mom was like hyper aware of noises. She heard us while you were going down on me and barrelled into the room with a shotgun,” she laughed, really loud. I laughed too, but made a face. “I pissed my pants,” I said, cocking my head to the side. She laughed even more, kicking my sides. “It was the fucking BEST, oh my god we joked about that for years. Mom and I had some jokes,” she said, as the toast popped up.

"You don’t get my jokes?" "I never get your jokes dad even mom." Dad immediately face mom. "You don’t get my jokes honey?" "No! I do well most of the time." She smile sheepishly. "Tyler, my jokes aren’t that bad right?" I glanced at Tyler and saw him shaking his head. "No, of course not. I find it funny." "See… even Tyler like it." I rolled my eyes. "He’s a liar." I muttered lowly. Dad raised his eyebrow to me. "What’s that?"

"Kaiden and Roman would have such a field day if they ever heard me telling something like that." "Well, good thing I'm not a dad. Hey, do you want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it." I choke on my own saliva in an effort to groan louder than Dad, but I have to admit mom's lame jokes are taking my mind off the stinging pain and desire in my body. "Then there's the one about the clown who visited his cousin in Austra—" Dad opens his mouth to cut her off, but he's interrupted by a loud banging on the front door.

She would just crack this joke about him searching for the world’s best coffee or some equally crazy thing. It was her quirky way of coping, of dealing with the pain_ turning it into humor. And you know what? It kinda worked for a while, made me laugh and forget the whole deal. But as I got older, those jokes mom made started to feel hollow. I craved the truth about why dad decided to leave us behind.

I said urging her to speak. " she is your mum " vonne said Hah yeah the most expensive joke of the year everyone knows my parents are both dead "You must be mistaken my parents are both dead okayy they died when I was six " I said to her "Its true dear I'm your mum " the older lady said " I don't believe you my mum is dead my dad is dead everyone I know is dead " I yelled Cause everything is pissing me off its itching me " 🎶Go to sleep baby my little girl🎶

rest! I immediately sat back up and stared at my mom with wide eyes when she came rushing inside my room with a wide grin on her face. "Guess what!?" She asked. Knowing her, if I won't participate with her Guess What jokes, she would not stop harassing me. "..........." Tired of waiting, I asked, "So..?" "GUESS WHAT!?" Oh. She really wants me to guess. "You won the lottery?" She snorted, waving me off, "No."

Even though I've tried to be quiet, they always have a way of bothering me. I also slapped Sonya for no reason. That time, Sonya made fun of Mom, who had been in a coma for years. She used to call me a motherless child. She also said that I was born from a mummy. I was so angry when she made fun of Mom and me.

Kaden looped his arm through my mom's and shot me a smug look. "Want to know the truth? Mom bought this house five years ago for me. She was just waiting for you to pay off the mortgage so she could transfer it to me. We're not here to ask. We're here to tell you." I looked at my mom in disbelief. "Is that true? Was this whole thing just you manipulating me from the start?"