You Re So Old Jokes One Liners

I was nine months pregnant when a man ambushed me, dragging me to the rooftop and repeatedly stabbing me. He had a grudge against my husband for replacing him. Meanwhile, my husband, a rescue team leader, was frantically coordinating efforts to stop his depressed ex-lover from burning down a rental apartment. I never called for his help. In a previous life, I had desperately called him, and he had abandoned his ex-lover to rush to my side. As a result, my child and I survived the attack, but his ex-lover perished in the fire she ignited. My husband seemed unfazed, even booking a VIP delivery room for me. Yet, on the day I was to give birth, he bound me and brutally stabbed our newborn multiple times. "You were in on this plot, weren't you?" he snarled. "Those wounds? They're nothing! You weren't even close to dying!" "Oh, you like being stabbed so much? I'll give you exactly what you want!" Suddenly, I found myself back on the day of the kidnapping. This time, I decided to let him go save his precious ex-lover.

Before Mom's surgery, Mason—yeah, the Mason Leonhart from one of Brighton's big-name families—suddenly "had" to go on a business trip and couldn't be at the hospital. A few hours later, Judy Yeager blasted a video on social. There was Mason, Mr. Born-With-A-Silver-Spoon, recycling bottles with her. Caption: [If we work hard together, no hardship can scare us.] I couldn't resist. [Future Leonhart heir, worth ten billion, still helping his girl recycle bottles to trade in for cash—heartwarming.] It vanished in seconds. My phone lit up. Mason's voice? Ice cold. "Shiloh Harrington, what was that? Call Judy. Tell her you were joking." I laughed. "Keep playing your little poor-boy cosplay without me." Hung up. Three days till the divorce cooling-off ended. Then Mason could be the broke man he was pretending to be.

Connor came back home drunk one midnight and had his way with one of the maids who they both secretly had feelings for each other. She got pregnant and despite being in a serious relationship with his lover, there was pressure to marry Nancy because of the unborn child as the Martins' do not abandon their flesh and blood. How will the duo who hate each other so much make this work?

"Tell me it is not real, if it is real then I can't take it, I loved you fucked you catered for you and this is what I get in return?" "I payed you accordingly you are nothing less than a whore"

Born to lead—destined to die. Due to the pack’s council not accepting her destiny, Amelia is cast into the human world for her safety and grows up unaware of her true power. But everything changes when a package arrives for her before her 18th birthday—letters from her late father that unlock the biggest secret she’d ever discover… “You, my daughter, are a werewolf.” …or so she thought. Determined to uncover the truth behind the dangers that threatened her, Amelia returns to her place of birth—the Silver Moon pack. There, she crosses paths with Everett Shaw, the captivating and frustrating son of the Alpha and future heir. Sparks fly, secrets unravel, and a powerful curse simmers beneath the surface as Amelia searches for answers in a world where trusting the wrong person could be fatal. Power. Legacy. Love. Betrayal. In a world where tradition is law, can a female rewrite the rules? -------------------- Content Warning: The story will begin lighthearted but take a dark turn, with elements of violence, sexual assault and even abuse/torture. There will also be intimate and sexual scenes included throughout different parts of the story. Please be cautious before reading.

It's more like a war a woman finding out her husband is getting married in less than twenty one days. She's ruined her marriage by ignoring her husband for so many months and he took drastic decisions of adding another wife. That is tragic because he is deeply in love with his first wife. He got married to the President's daughter and she is hellbent on ruining his perfect home alongside their daughter. She is the real definition of cunning, manipulative and nefarious human. Her love merged to the world of obsession, she is taking over her own life. Things happened, life got ruined in less than twenty one days. It is up for both women to find their destiny and what karma has in store for them.

A very successful businessman who was willing to sacrifice even his family for his goal to become the most powerful man in the world was reborn to the earth two hundred thousand years after only to find the world different from what he knew. Humans now have necro which can improve their abilities, turning them into superhumans which help them fight extraterrestrial-like creatures known as kuishinbos. In a new world where necros define power, Vander has none. How will he survive? How will he persevere? Will he continue his goal? Join Vander in his unforgettable experience in overcoming all the obstacles he will face in the new world.

Henry has lived his life in the shadow of exile, struggling alongside his mother after being cast out of their pack. College offers him a chance at freedom, but also brings him closer to three powerful men whose love could change everything: Adrian, the kind school principal who sheltered him; Elias, the newly restored Alpha who promises him honor and belonging; and Damien Dowell, the billionaire CEO who offers passion and power. Torn between safety, destiny, and ambition, Henry must decide where his true heart lies. But which path will he choose? Which love will define his future?

"I don't do business with monsters!" Mino sarcastically exclaimed, glaring fiercely at the lady with a thin cloth covering her face. "So was I with a pathetic human," Vreihya grumbled angrily. They both despised one other's kind because, in their own views, they were both monsters. Vreihya is the strongest vampire, fated by prophecy to bear a child who will substitute the Goddess of the Moon, yet she cannot live freely without the human who is her only remedy for her illness, and when the human perish, she dies. Their foes will object to having a half-human blooded vampire as their new Goddess, thus they will go to any length to slay the mortal and dominate the most powerful vampire in the vampire world.

เพราะงานเลี้ยงบริษัทในคืนวันคริสต์มาสทำให้เธอบังเอิญ One Night กับมาเฟีย! 💋💋💋