Dirty Tagalog Jokes Novels & Stories

“Let’s go, Jade. Wala naman tayong makukuha sa pakikipag-usap sa kanila.” Ngunit bago tuluyang lumakad, sumulyap pa si Jade sa tatlo, mabigat ang boses nang sambitin, “Tsk tsk. Wala na talagang aasahan ang Pilipinas sa mga kagaya ninyo.” Gio, na tila hindi makapigil sa sarili, tumalikod saglit at ngumisi. “Kagaya namin? Na ano? Mayayaman?”

hindi niya napigilan ang sarili na tanungin ito. "Ang gwapo mo naman," nagniningning ang mga matang bati niya sa lalaki. "Ahm, yeah I am. Pero dito na ako lumaki so I speak tagalog. And you too, you're gorgeous." namula ang mukha niya sa pambobola nito. Sana mayaman ka, para ikaw na lang! Baka ikaw ang para sa akin. "T-thank you, ahm saan ka nakatira?" tanong niya. Siguro kung narito lang ang ina niya ay kanina pa siya nito kinurot dahil ang harot niya. Kinikilig ang bunbunan ko!

Alam ko ang ibig sabihin 'nun kung hindi ako nagkakamali. "Taga saan ba si Ram?" tanong ko ulit kay Jodi na puno ng kaba. "Why? Sa Laguna. Don't tell me maglalamay ka?" tanong niya pabalik. "Baka payagan." bulong ko sa sarili ko. Bumungtong hininga ako bago nagtipa ng sagot. "Alam mo namang kahit gustuhin ko hindi ako papayagan ano ka ba."

Come on, I'll take three shots as punishment—consider it a toast to you and Macy! Todd stood to the side, his expression shifting between anger and panic. He stared at me intently, as if I were the cheating wife, the disgust in his eyes practically spilling over. Looking at the bunch of fools in front of me, I couldn't even be bothered to be angry. I turned my head and glanced at Terrence. He'd worked under Dad for 20 years. There was no way he'd be able to tolerate anyone insulting me like this. He suddenly raised his hand, about to slap Miguel across the face.

Bigla tuloy nagkaroon ng imaginary boxing ring sa paligid, at nakita ko ang sarili kong may hawak na microphone at nag sasalita. On the right corner, Abbigail Alejandro, On the left corner, Maliyah diko alam ang apelyido! "Alam mo Abbigail, Matagal ng mainit ang dugo ko sa'yo and now I know why?" "Oh sige kunwari may pake ako, bakit ba?" Ngayon naman ay nakagat ko ang loob ng pisnge ko para mag pigil ng tawa. "Because you're kulang sa pansin and stupid."

Odell Lumaban: Haha gago14 Danica Garcia: Tanga15 Felicity Bautista: OY OY OY OY OY OY Felicity Bautista: You forgot tarantado16 Naia Baniaga: I’m dead at this convo Odell Lumaban: Well the joke’s dead now, airps. Are you happy with yourself? Naia Baniaga: F you Zoe Torres: Maingay17 Felicity Bautista: Opo18 ma’am Logan dela Vega: Heard that? That’s the sound of victory Zoe Torres: You’re still fucking stupid, Logan Odell Lumaban: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

Dahil aktibo pa ang utak ko dahil sa kapeng nainom kanina, nag-F******k na lang ako para antukin. Diego Lloyd Catamora: Magandang gabi diyan, dzai! Heto na naman ang bwisit. Mukhang gising pa kahit late na! I really wish that I did not confirm him as a F******k friend, but then Kezi said that he's her cousin. Nakikipagkaibigan 'yung tao, tapos aayawan ko? Baka sabihan pa akong choosy, tss. Diego Lloyd Catamora: Masyado ka ba talagang busy para hindi ako reply-in?

tumango naman siya. "Nice to meet you Drixity" he held out his hand and he accepted it. "Nice to meet you too" he said cutely. "Im happy that i meet you here" he nodded and came to me and knelt down while touching my clothes. "You're dirty" I smiled at what he said. "You talk Tagalog?" he stopped then looked at me "Tagalog?" he suddenly asked so I nodded "What's that?" I just smiled at what he said. "You're dirty," I said while squeezing his face

laughed at the promise. It's probably because I was surprised that a dirty child was clinging to me. Why should I be happy, right? "Naturally, I was surprised, Gen. Maybe later it will be kicked and bitten." "There are no ghosts here. There are no ghosts. There are monsters." This is the answer. "You know, it's amazing that you know folk tales. Do you know the words you use in Tagalog? Can't it be Korean, Japanese, Russian, or Italian... Why Filipino and English?" I asked wonderingly. Of course, I'm Filipino, I just happened to ask here.

Inis kong tanong sabay turo sa sarili ko. Ba't bigla-bigla nya nalang akong tinatawag na bitch?! Inaano ko ba sya! "What? No! What I mean is do you like beach?" "Do I like bitch? DO I LIKE BITCH?? Abay gagu ka ba? At sino namang baliw ang gusto ng bitch ha!" Pasigaw kong saad sakanya. "Gosh ang bingi nya sobra." "Beach like dagat in tagalog Ms. Vee! Gets mo po ba huh??"