Funny Tagalog Joke

*Abandoning ship isn’t my style. It wasn’t hers either, but our circumstances ripped us apart. Now it’s not just a literal ocean standing between us. Francine Chirilova has no direction. After coming out of the closet leaves her without a family at age 18, the quick witted 25 year old has been forced to survive on her connections and kind personality. Throw in a rapidly decreasing appetite and a tendency to gravitate toward abusive women for a epic shit show. While recovering from her latest 4 year long mistake, she makes a strong, yet unlikely connection with her virtual best friend. Que in recovering alcoholic Vasilisa Krovopuskova, aged 26 from Siberia, Russia. After surviving a grueling upbringing on her own, trust is a difficult concept to grasp. Already having experienced heartbreak once before, she wasn’t looking for anything serious when Francine crash landed into her life via an online sanctuary for lesbians. With an ocean separating the two, neither Francine nor Vasilisa know which direction to swim in. Will they stay on their side of the world, or drown trying to get to the other? *Disclaimer* - Strong mature content. 18+, please Book one. To follow is book two: “Our Blank Canvas.”

Year Malkame returns to her hometown after ten years of exile. She came back following pieces of a puzzle she really needed to find in order to meet her Secret santa, the man or woman who had been gifting her lonely childhood Christmases with joy and music. Being sent away from her home at the age of fourteen, she had lost the trail of the person she was looking for. But now, she wants to finally find him. But in her journey, she finds her childhood best friend Justin. A misfortune leaves her under the same roof with this man. What happens when long-time friends come together after ten years? What happens when she realizes who her secret santa is? And what the hell happens when a billionaire decides he suddenly wants her to not only work for him but also be his woman?

As soon as my husband sat at the dining table, he couldn't stop himself from talking. The humiliations of my school days had become his favorite entertainment, served up to his drinking buddies like appetizers. "Back then, she got her clothes torn off in the bathroom, beaten so badly she crawled on the ground like a dog, too terrified to make a sound. If it weren’t for my kindness—" That was it. I couldn’t take it anymore. I told him I wanted a divorce. He laughed it off, utterly unbothered. "Seriously? It’s just a joke! That was ages ago. You’re way too uptight—it’s just for a laugh, right?" For a laugh? Was I the only one with a past? Did he think he was untouchable? Maybe I should tell a few embarrassing stories about his precious childhood sweetheart. Fine. If it’s all about “fun,” I hoped his sweetheart found it equally hilarious when her turn came.

PARA kay Rafael ay perpekto na ang buhay niya. Party all night, sleep all day, and life would be easy, tulad ng sa kanta. Falling in love is not on his lists. Serious relationships are not included on his vocabulary. Nasa kanya na ang lahat, from his head-turning look to his big-fat bank account and wealth ay wala na siyang hihilingin pa. SIMULA pagkabata ay nabuhay si Tamara na naaayon sa kagustuhan ng kanyang ina. Lahat ng sinasabi nito ay kailangan niyang sundin, mula sa pag-aaral hanggang sa pipiliing mga kaibigan. Magbabago kaya ang mga pananaw nila sa buhay kung mag-krus ang kanilang mga landas? Lalaking walang pakialam sa mangyayari at babaeng may kailangang mapatunayan. Magagawa ba silang baguhin ng pag-ibig?

Celeste San Pedro, a typical senior-high school student of Hirokoshi High tends to live a normal life in Tokyo City, Japan with his older brother. Her life as a student was quite okay until she started to experience weird dreams with voices calling her in an unfamiliar name. She knew that the school library she used to visit every afternoon has something to do with this paranoia. And that she came across with an old and antique book which soon became a portal to an unexisting world. She lost herself in the city and woke up as a new being living in an old town of Gokayama. Growing with strange romantic feelings for each of the four main book characters, she almost forgot that she has her own real life too outside the book. Will she be able to return or will be forever miss her home?

Ava, is a woman with big ambitions who will do her best to get them. She is capable of sacrificing anything, including the one she loves. Because of her dream, Ava had to leave. Harris is a man who is unconcerned about his own life. Everyday he will get drunk, as well as play with the hearts of the women he'll meet. When he met Ava, everything changed. He transformed into a decent man for Ava. Misty, on the other hand, is an obsessed hopeless romantic. Envy-filled woman, she was consumed by rage, allowing her to accomplish anything she wanted. Regardless of what will happen, she will do anything to make Ava miserable. Will Harris love be strong enough to wait Ava's return? Will they return to each other's arms when the right time comes? After everything Ava had to sacrifice, can she still choose to be with Harris?

Walang ibang pinangarap si Paloma kung hindi ang maging isang kilalang modelo. Naabot na niya ang pangarap na 'yon dahil unti-unti na siyang nakikilala at nagkakapangalan sa industriya pero ang lahat ng kanyang pinaghirapan ay mawawala dahil sa isang gabing pagkakamali. Arken Fernandez is a perfectionist guy. Business minded person at priority ang kanyang trabaho. Paano kung isang gabi ay pareho silang magkamali? Papanindigan ba nila ang pagkakamaling 'yon? Mahuhulog ba sila sa isa't isa? O mananatiling lihim ang lahat ng naganap nang gabing 'yon pati na ang naging bunga nito?

Amalthea Romano is the most organized person you'd ever meet. From her closet, down to her study table, everything must be perfectly aligned. Ganoon din sa schedules niya! She's very goal oriented. She planned to graduate college, run the family business, get married eventually or maybe spend the rest of her life with her beloved pets. But one Sunday morning ruins it all. Papaanong biglang nasingit sa schedule niya ang maging babysitter?

| PSYCHOLOGICAL THRILLER FILIPINO NOVEL | Selene, a 19-year-old Psychology student, was diagnosed with schizophrenia—a chronic brain disorder which causes delusions and hallucinations. She refused to accept this fact, believing she’s perfectly fine. It was too late when she figured out the truth: it was a misdiagnosis. It was not that disorder that led her to kill her schoolmates and her father.

Gracie, daughter of Lucifer, was sent to Earth to find her brother who ditched his responsibilities in Hell. Her brother was disguised as a teacher in an elite high school so she went there as a 16-year-old high school student.The only plan was to forcibly dragged her brother back to Hell but things changed when her life turns upside-down. She was tangled in campings, field trips, school plays which she really hated to the hell and back. Between those happenings, she met David, a human with a cold personality but with a very biblical name.David was already engaged with another human but the blame was on her when the girl suddenly died. Because ever since she arrived at that school, killings never stopped but she swears in the name of her father and all her uncles, she did not do the deed.Can she successfully persuade her brother to go back home when all of the happenings in school are not according to her liking?What about David? She liked that damn human.