Funny Quotes Humor

"Five thousand dollars. I will pay you to have sex with me," I said to the handsome stranger. “Ten thousand dollars. I will pay you ten… No, fifteen,” At that moment, I just wanted to get laid. It was the only thing I could think of. “If you are still not fine with it... I will increase the money,” I whispered against his lips… ***** I caught my boyfriend of several years cheating on me with my own cousin. It already sounded bad, but ending up in bed with a hot stranger who turned out to be my ex-boyfriend's dad was even worse. Still, I'm not a woman who wallows in self-pity. I was going to use this to my advantage. I was planning to find my way into the handsome billionaire's life in order to get revenge on his cheating son, but the man beat me at my own game. Unexpectedly, he approached me first, asking me to marry him, upon our second meeting! The look in his eyes, his voice, everything about him screamed suspicious, but did his motivations matter? For now, not really. I was determined to make my ex-boyfriend pay for wasting my time all these years. I was going to make my cousin crawl at my feet and beg for my forgiveness...

One brother hired her. The other can’t let her go. She only meant to play pretend. She never meant to steal a heart… or hide his heir. Gianna “Gigi” Rae Cuevas grew up with nothing, hustling on the streets just to survive. But one reckless act of bravery—saving billionaire Rafael De Luca from a thief—throws her into a world of wealth and power. Her reward? A deal too good to refuse: pretend to be Rafael’s girlfriend for one month. It should have been simple. Until Rafael’s older brother walks in. Leandro De Luca is cold, ruthless, and impossible to resist. He believes Gigi is a gold-digger. He wants her gone. But the more he fights it, the deeper he falls. When lies, betrayal, and scandal tear them apart, Gigi vanishes. Years later, she returns with the one secret that could destroy them all. A forbidden romance. A dangerous bargain. And a love that refuses to stay buried.

"Then let's get a divorce!" With courage, Leora left her husband's house, after being accused of poisoning his mistress. Her in-laws and sister-in-law had planned various ways to kick her out of Peter's house and in the end Leora gave in. However, no one expected that things would turn 180 degrees after the divorce. When everyone who had hurt her was happy with each other's lies, Leora returned. This time, she was no longer the poor orphan girl from the orphanage. She has changed and not only that, she also carries a big secret that will make everyone turn to worship her feet.

Usaha Topan dan Zahra mengalami kebangkrutan dan untuk sementara tinggal di kampungnya. Semenjak di kampung, Topan berubah, dia selalu makan di rumah ibunya yang dikirim oleh kekasihnya. Ternyata ia berencana menikah lagi dengan kekasih lamanya yang janda kaya. Zahra akhirnya memilih untuk kembali ke kota karena tidak setuju jika harus dimadu. Terjadi perdebatan hebat sebelum Zahra memutuskan pergi. Sampai keluar kata talak dari Topan dan mengatakan semua yang pernah mereka miliki selama berumah tangga dulu diserahkan pada istrinya. Namun di kota, Zahra bertemu dengan ahli waris Samsul, orang yang dulu menipunya. Apa yang akan dilakukan anaknya Samsul pada utang ayahnya?

Aliyah wants a new start in her life kaya nagpasya siyang umalis sa kanilang bahay at manirahan mag-isa. She thought it was easy, but being independent is very difficult, lalo na't ang kaniyang buhay ay umiikot na may katuwang sa buhay. Ngunit hindi niya inaasahan na doon niya rin matatagpuan ang pag-ibig... isang makasalanang pag-ibig na hindi niya matatakasan gaya ng kung paano niya tinakasan ang marangyang buhay na kinagisnan. They both knew it was a mistake to fall in love with each other ngunit pinili parin nila na makasama ang isa't isa. Ngunit hanggang saan nila kayang panindigan ang makasalanang pag-ibig na ito? Maipaglaban kaya ito ng isa sa kanila hanggang dulo o, hahantong sa pagpapalaya at pagsuko?

She was abandoned on her wedding day. He was the stranger who gave her his name. But in a marriage built on secrets, how long can love survive before the truth tears it apart?

Jaxon Carter has everything a man could want—talent, fame, and a multimillion-dollar contract with the Titans almost within his grasp. The only problem? His reckless lifestyle stands between him and the contract. But his agency has told him that he can salvage the contract by cleaning up his image. Sienna Blake has two things in life she held dear —her ballet career and her house she grew up creating memories in. But when the bank forecloses her house and her ballet career barely covers her bills, she turns to her agency, only to be coldly rejected. When their paths cross at the agency, Jax sees an opportunity. She needs money. He needs stability. The solution? A fake relationship. He offers to clear her debts in exchange for playing the perfect doting girlfriend—just long enough it's beneficial to them. But what starts as a transaction soon spirals into something neither of them expected. Public appearances turn into stolen moments and close proximate intimacy blurs into something more. They find themselves trapped in a dangerous game—one where the greatest risk isn’t losing a contract or a house… but losing their hearts. And just when Sienna is ready to confess the biggest secret of all, Jax's past comes haunting them. Hurt and betrayed, she walks away without a second glance, choosing to protect her heart and her unborn child. Will Jax fight for what they had? Will he risk everything—including his career—to fight for the only thing that ever truly mattered?

One blind date. Two reluctant hearts. A fake romance that feels way too real… Sienna Blake isn’t looking for love—not after her last relationship left her with more scars than memories. But when her meddling mother sets her up on a blind date, she agrees just to keep the peace. What she doesn’t expect is to come face-to-face with Julian Thorne—her arrogant ex’s boss, a ruthless lawyer with a reputation as cold as the suits he wears. Julian Thorne—high-powered attorney, cold-blooded strategist, and her ex’s dangerously attractive boss. They met once, a year ago, at a company gala. He thought she was a gold digger clinging to her meal ticket. She thought he was an arrogant snob with a god complex. Now he’s her blind date. Julian has his reasons for going along with the charade. Sienna might be the key to taking down a betrayal that nearly cost him everything. All he has to do is play nice, get close, and keep his heart out of it. But the more time they spend pretending, the more real it starts to feel. And when secrets from the past resurface, they’ll have to choose: continue the lie—or risk everything for the truth. From fake to fate—what if the biggest lie becomes their only truth?

Noong birthday ng single mother na si Grace Saavedra ay hinayaan ng anak nito na si Dexter na matupad ang hiling ng ina. Ang magkaroon pa ng isang anak. Anak na babae. Sa isang ampunan, nakita ni Grace ang sampung-taong gulang na si Heather. Dinala sa bahay, at doon nakilala ni Dexter ang bagong kapatid niya. Si Heather na madalas niyang kaaway pero naging malapit sa kanya. Hanggang lumipas ang taon, ang batang si Heather ay isa ng dalaga, magandang dalaga. At iba na ang nararamdaman sa kanyang kuya na sampung taon ang agwat sa kaniya? Paano ba masasabi ni Heather ang nararamdaman para sa kapatid niya na hindi man niya tunay na kadugo ay para na niyang tunay na pamilya? Matatanggap ba kaya ni Dexter ang pag-ibig ng ampon niyang kapatid?

May has it all—beauty, poise, and the right to inherit a multi-million-dollar mansion and the prestigious Greenfield Hospital. But with the hospital on the brink of bankruptcy and the government threatening to seize the property, her only chance to save her father’s legacy lies in one condition: marry Collin Grey, the wealthy CEO and son of her father’s best friend. Their engagement is meant to be a lifeline—until Collin accuses her of cheating and shatters her world with shocking proof: she’s pregnant. The problem? May is still a virgin. With her engagement broken and her inheritance slipping through her fingers, May sets out to uncover the truth. Her investigation reveals a twisted web of betrayal and dangerous schemes—a swapped lab test, a jealous stepsister, a scheming secretary, and a connection to three of the country’s most powerful (and ruthless) billionaire CEOs. Now carrying a child whose paternity could shake empires, May must choose between reclaiming her father's crumbling legacy, protecting her child, or uncovering deeper conspiracies that could destroy their world. Hers and her child's.