Novel & Cerita I Don't Want

Umiling ito sa akin. "Still, I don't want you to get jealous.!" WARNING...

Sagot niya na tila nagyayabang. Gusto kong sampalin ang mayabang na lalake na ito ngunit kailangan kong kontrolin baka I-rape niya pa ako, mukha kasi siyang drug addict. "Well, I am not marrying you and I don't care about the fact that your mother liked me and my parents wanting it. I can be hell selfish and I always get away from the things I don't like. Stop the car I'm now here."

Perhaps not. I rose to my feet. I don't want to leave. But I have to.

“What I want? Do you know what I want?” I want to slowly run my fingers on your neck. That’s what I want. “Yes. Ang hindi ko pag-deny sa iniisip ng iba na may relasyon tayo. Para hindi ka mawalan ng supporters at hindi ka ma-bash. Para sa career mo as a vlogger.”

Kaso minsan, kahit hindi natin gusto, maiiwan at may iiwanan tayo. All I want is to be happy. But God didn't let me. I am so scared right now, Love. I really want to end my life para hindi ko na maramdaman ang sakit. I am so drain. Hindi ko na kaya. Pagod ako. Nasasaktan ako. Nahihirapan ako.

Kung panaginip man ito ayaw ko nang magising kung sakali mang totoo. I don't want to end this because,I want to be with her forever.. ------

Hindi ko nakuha ang ibig niyang sabihin dahil napako ang isip ko sa halik niya. I think I want more.

Natatakot ako dahil baka bigla akong magbago dahil dito. I don't want to change. But don't I really want to? Am I planning to be a cold and heartless lady forever? I gritted my teeth because of that thought. I shouldn't think about those. Ano ba ang naiisip ko? I will never change. I was born this way and I will die this way. Walang magbabago sa buhay ko.

"I want to spend time with you, alone." ---

Because God knows I care. I really fucking care. Natakot lang ako. Naduwag. Na sana hindi ko dapat pinairal. Kasi ngayon, nangyayari na ang kinakatakutan ko. He is mad. He hates me. And he doesn't want to see me.