I Don't Want To Live Novels & Stories

And just in less than a year, the perfect little world I lived in, slowly turns into a lunatic fucking nightmare that never ends. No. I. DON’T. WANT. TO DIE. Not now, not in this way, at least. Like why does that son of bitch get to live his goddamn life after all the terrible things he has done to me, while I have to suffer the consequence? It’s fucking unfair. I don’t want to die.

Gina’s voice is soft. “You know what I want to do right now?” I blink. “I want to pack everything up and leave this godforsaken town. I want to go somewhere far away. I want to go to all those places I’ve always wanted to go to. I just want to live life on my terms while I still can. Away from everyone who wants to use me and humiliate me and hurt me all the time.” The very thought of dying in this town where only one or two people will actually give a flying fuck makes me feel suffocated.

Then again, I'm stuck in the world of the living, no matter how much anyone wishes me dead. “My soulmate didn’t want anything to do with.”

Even if I wanted to die already, someone would still really saves me. I want to end my suffering. The pain here in my heart was too much and I think I could not handle it anymore. I do not wanna live forever. Fuck this life. I am tired anymore. I want to rest. Everything is too much for me.

“Learn how to live with it. Like all of us.” He began to come close as those words only rubbed salts on my wound. “If you want to survive, that is.” “Learn?” I scoffed, folding my arm at my chest. “Learn how to become heartless? No. I didn’t want to become someone unrecognizable.” The couple fell silent, exchanging a look filled with pity for me but that failed to reduce the sting of my heart. “I do not want to become someone who has to ‘survive’ her home. I want to live.”

I mean, I don’t care, but I don’t want them to feel like it. I want to go home. Will I make it without another entity appearing out of nowhere?

Adrian asked. I looked up. "Because I don't have a future." Adrian fell silent. "I'm tired. I'm tired of being what other people want me to be. I'm tired of being a mother, a whore, a contract wife, everything I never chose. I just want to die," I said. Adrian sighed. "You can't die. You have Ethan." "Ethan would be better off without me." "That's not true." "I don't know anymore, Adrian. I don't know what's true."

I don't want you to know about me. I don't want you to know about me. I'm nobody. That is what I am. My life has been a series of one mistake after another, and now this...this is the final straw in my already very weak and broken camel's back. I can no longer stand on it. My legs have buckled under me. My face is pale from fear. It’s too much...too hard…and I can’t take it anymore. This has gone on for far too long. I don’t know if there is an “after this” for me anymore.

I'd never been bothered by my bachelor lifestyle before, but right now--- I didn’t want this anymore. But what do I want then? “Levi?”

I had to be strong and fight for our family when he didn't have the strength to do it himself. "You said that you can live without me. I know, I can do that too." My eyebrows pulled together as I explained it to him the way I see it, "Life doesn't stop at someone, no matter how much you love that person, your brain is programmed to always find a way to move on and adjust. It happens, to everyone. But the thing isn't about whether you can or can't..it's about whether you want it or not." I said, "So do you want that? Do you want to live without me? Because I don't...I don't want that." I truly admitted and words tumbled out so easily, "I want you."