Miserable Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

George declared while chewing the last meat. “That is a good idea,” the HR Manager concurred happily. “Provided it won't affect their budget for the month,” the Accountant promulgated and the General Manager glared at him. “I dislike Accountants,” he blurted out. “Especially the miserly ones,” Capt. Miles chipped in immediately and everyone laughed loudly. Capt. Graham was surprised at their outburst and gave them a questioning look. “Why are you laughing? What is funny?” He furrowed his brow and asked.

This had me laughing out loud as I laid back in my seat to stare at all of them. “Look at you all. I thought you must have changed but instead you all are still despicable and very dumb. After everything this is still how I am being treated. Like a common thief and liar. It’s funny how you all saw me as a cheap person who wants to take your money. “You all are boastful liars. All talk and no bite. You all are nothing before me. As for you Mirian, you talked about how rich your husband is and how you married someone with millions yet you cannot get out the money to replace the damage you’ve caused.

There’s no heart in there. “Do you like Mexican sausage?” He walks towards the dining room. “Is that some kind of euphemism?” Johnny laughs. “A sense of humor. We like that around here.” He slaps my shoulder like football players would after a good game. That almost hurt but it was more annoying than anything.

(Favourite KAJ quotes) Always expect nothing or the worst from people so you wouldn't be in a shocked state when you get disappointed at anytime. The few people I've let this known to pointed out that it seems way too harsh, mostly Veronica and Mageret. And ever since, I stopped telling people but remind myself all the time because to me it's not harsh cause it's the hard damned truth. The truth is that, people fail to handle the truth all the time. That's why there are lots of heartbreaks here and there, broken/failed marriages coupled along with homicide and suicide. P.S: My friends never quit reminding me how much of a weirdo I and my thoughts are.

"What? What would you do, you poor thing? People like you couldn't even have a decent meal 3 times a day. Gosh, that's too limited. Here's a thing transferee, whatever you think you'll throw against me, don't do it. You'll end up bad; I assure you that you don't wanna try me." "You must have a sad life to think that you need to ruin people just to feel fulfilled in your life. I wonder why all the money, power, and influence you mentioned couldn't make you happy." "Who said I'm not happy? I get everything I want, and that's making me happy, isn't it obvious? Oh, poor people wouldn't understand. But hey, sorry I need to ask, how was your Audi ride? It must be your first time."

“They deify you, and you are a devil.” “Yes, of course, of the worst kind, and I don't think I'm unattainable or that I have it in gold. I remember a saying of my grandfather's that says ´both the pretty and the ugly also poop and pee.”. “Lol is a very funny friend, but that doesn't mean that you have to go around the street like a hunter looking for a prey that satisfies your crazy desires, and besides, the poor guy would surely fall in love, and you would throw him away after a week, like you do with everyone else.”

He said making me scoff. "Mari bhul hu paidi. Mari bhul mane laigu. Mari bhul hu office gai. Mari bhul hu keva nu bhuli gai. Mari bhul ke mane dukhe. Badhi mari bhul bas khush." I said glaring at him as he shook his head. ( My mistake that I fell down. My mistake that I got hurt. My mistake that I went to office. My mistake that I forgot to tell you. My mistake that I'm in pain. Everything is my mistake- now happy. )

I let out a sarcastic smile, “have fun inhaling carbon dioxide there.” With that, they burst out laughing. “We really need to think ways to put some humor inside your brain!” Ave exclaimed, still laughing. I pursed my lips. “I don’t need that.” “As expected from you,” Rebel chuckled. I roll my eyes heavenwards. I don’t need some humor. A bitter smile placed against my lips. I only need someone who’ll save me from this hell. “How about this?” “Your showing too much skin.” “This one?” “Too short.”

Stormie ranted. Naya laughed. "What's funny?" Stormie asked annoyed. She didn't stopped laughing. "Are you dumb, I fucking asked you what's funny?" He shouted. She paused. "You are funny, for the fact that my life is so much better than yours made me laugh more." Naya said. "How will a miserable like like yours be better than mine? Is that how your level of madness reached?" Stormie asked.

“But, I mean, if you’re that desperate, bro, I don’t mind jerking you off. Charity work. For old times’ sake.” I stared at him. Deadpan. For a full three seconds. Then I said, voice flat as asphalt, “Even as a joke, that wasn’t funny.” He threw his head back and howled while Ellis choked on his beer, coughing and laughing at the same time, tears actually forming at the corners of his eyes. It wasn’t fun being the fucked-up sideshow. I took one last drag then crushed the joint out in the ashtray so hard the glass cracked.