Smartass Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

About fifteen minutes into the drive, I asked, “Why so slow?” “Oh, I’m sorry. Do you feel the need, the need for… going faster?” I laughed so loudly I almost snorted and had to put both of my hands over my nose since even a baby like me recognizes the famous movie quote he almost said. “You’re a funny guy in an unassuming way.” He turned a slight shade of pink. “Yeah, well, in our line of work you have to find some way to be a little bit of a comedian, or you’ll end up in the loony bin.”

I don’t feel jealous! I don't care about that madman! That one is crazy, yes, crazy! He's insane! He's heartless! Remember this, Amy! That guy is nothing! He's nothing but a dumb*ss! Dumb*ss and a dumb*ss! Oh, who owns these abs? Because, I looked up a bit and abs are the first that my eyes saw. Oh, don't tell me. I even looked up and that's it! It's him! The fool even grinning!

Ash: Don't Olivia: The uwus I’m busting Olivia: So many uwuwuwuwuwuwuwuwuws Ash: You're so f*cking annoying Olivia: You 'haha'd me Olivia: So, you are human after all Olivia: You can laugh Olivia: You are so cute, Mob boss Ash 😊 Olivia: Can you vocally 'haha' for me? I want to hear your laugh 😙 Ash: f*ck you

“Making the best of an unpleasant situation. Jessie, you can be a miracle worker. Go on. Put your two cents' worth in. Then turn it into a dollar.” “You need to work on your motivational quotes.” Jessie hugged Hannah and went on her way to meet up with Alrick. * * * Ashley looked in shock at the half-dressed man crowding her in the passenger. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You’re crazy. Back off. You’re too close.”

“Yeah? So was the last guy I was involved with. Been there, done that, have the tie-dyed T-shirt and the roach clip to prove it. Move along, Picasso.” “You always such a smartass?” “Better than being a dumbass. Which is what you are if you think I’m gonna fall for your line of bullshit. Move.”

“Do you know what a bad idea that is?” Clara raised her hands defensively. “I said part of me. Only the sarcastic, slightly insane part.” Kacey clapped her hands. “Yes! That part is my favorite. Maybe we can get t-shirts: Team Sarcastic Clara.” Kacey you are unbearable, remind me why you are my un hired assistant ???? ********** Alex shook his head with mock disapproval. “And I suppose you’d wear it in court during deposition?” “Absolutely,” Clara said, smirking. “Nothing screams intimidation like sarcasm and a logo tee.”

Machi (Friend) why don't you give a try, Karthik said Karthik please shut up I already felt angry don't try to put oil in it. It's not like any game to try. How can I married someone without any kind of understanding and feelings,I barked That's my question why don't you feel anything towards girls, I mean from our college day to now girls are always surrounded you like mosquitoes. But more than a friend you don't involved with any girl even flirting. Are you really perfect, Ashwin said looking me from top to bottom. I know what he meant. He and his dirty jokes. I throw my mobile towards that monkey. He catch that. Again laughed at me like manic

He didn’t fit in this room and I couldn’t help but wonder how Asher had not noticed him. “That’s the most useless quote from Jane Eyre, from what I just witnessed it should be your least favorite quote.” He spoke to me in the same light voice like he was scared of making too much sound. He was right, Asher had just dropped a bomb down my throat but what can I do about it? “You’re right but I would not call myself a smart person if I let such trivial thing affect the rest of my day.” A blatant lie, it had already left a shadow on my mood. Maybe I should run away.

“It’s completely see-through.” I clutched the edge of the counter, a flush creeping up my neck. “I’m seriously amazed I haven’t been fired yet.” Casey snorted, coming up beside me and slapping on some lip balm like we were having a casual conversation. “Are you kidding me? You’re probably the best assistant he’s ever had.--” “Most assistants don’t go around flashing their boobs,” Casey smiled as she joked. “Right. Really helpful.” I said between my forced laugh.

“You really wouldn’t fit with us at all.” Quinn gave a benign smile back, was this really the only thing her small brain could come up with to comment on? “Lucky I don’t give two flying fucks what you think, at least I don’t go around showing my bare ass cheeks to all and sundry every time a gentle breeze blows.” Mila went red in the face. “That’s it, I’ve had enough of your fucking smart ass comments back to me, freshman!”