Smartass Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

Just a joke. “Whoever she gets married someday, she’s very lucky, because I can feel right away how it hit argh omg Marfy me Engineer!” One comment said that I laughed too much. The comments on Trace’s post here on I*******m are stupid and funny. It’s bad because he’s also famous here on I*******m and there are always people who like him. Then he just steals me a kiss. Oops HAHAHHA.

I am so freaking addicted and I don't want to quit’ I laughed. ‘You suck at taking selfies by the way.’ ‘What's wrong with them? I was trying to look cute for my wife, also I think I did pretty good for a first-timer’ he replied and I laughed. ’I don't think you and cute should be in a sentence’ He sent a laughing emoji. ’Are you trying to say I am ugly, Celine Belshar Nessar Abed’ God, he was impossible. ’Are you trying to fish for compliments, Belshar Nessar Abed’

The air was filled with their laughter as they retold splendidly outrageous and laugh inducing anecdotes. Sara launched the story, but with a dash of sweetness in her voice. “Austin presented me with a cup of coffee only for it to trip and spill all over my notes as if I am its clumsy oaf.” Austin interjected, he was doubtlessly sarcastic. “Of course no one could believe that Sara was reliable enough to observe a cup of coffee coming around.” Sara dodged with a smile that would not disappear from her face. “I don’t belittle your lack of intelligence; such is the case with some of the people.”

“It’s never early for anything as long as you want it.” “Nice quote. Where did you hear it from?” Asher asked me as he took a sip from the cup in his hands. “Would you believe me if I told you that I just made it up on the spot?” Asher stared at me for a few seconds before bursting into laughter, and I joined in, following suit. “That’s impressive.” “Thank you,” I replied, raising my glass towards him before taking a look around the place. “You look like you’ve got something you want to say, Lorenzo.”

I said sassly and was not able t o control m y laughter. I satred laughing loudly while clutching m y stomach. I was s o busy in m y laughing session that I didn't realise when h e pour all m y mango shake over m e . My mouth hung open a t his ridiculous act, and I started looking a t him with my widen eyes. "And no one messes with The Laksh Malhotra. Got i t ?." He said in a n equal sassiness and smirked a t me. "Laksh Malhotra you are s o gone." I murmed t o my self and without saying anything I went away from him towars the jet kitchen.

I let out a sarcastic smile, “have fun inhaling carbon dioxide there.” With that, they burst out laughing. “We really need to think ways to put some humor inside your brain!” Ave exclaimed, still laughing. I pursed my lips. “I don’t need that.” “As expected from you,” Rebel chuckled. I roll my eyes heavenwards. I don’t need some humor. A bitter smile placed against my lips. I only need someone who’ll save me from this hell. “How about this?” “Your showing too much skin.” “This one?” “Too short.”

I traced a constellation with a glint in my eyes, “It’s my motto, maybe you should make it yours too” I tilted my head to give him a genuine smile. I saw his wheels turning in his head for a while through his green orbs, then he broke into small chuckles, shaking his head. I blinked my eyes as to why he was laughing. We were talking serious things right before he began chortling. Did I say something funny? “Why’re you laughing?” I asked. He silenced his chuckles to look at me biting his lips preventing any more. “No wonder you were called the ‘Quote Schmuck’” he quoted.

I poured my coffee, gave them a mock salute, and strolled out. And just like that, a new weapon was born—sarcasm. --- By Friday, the office was a battlefield and I was fully armed. When Ada—the queen of sly remarks—snickered to someone loud enough for me to hear, “She probably doesn’t even have to touch her salary anymore,” I turned, leaned against her desk, and said with faux innocence, “Oh no, I still collect my salary. I just use it for snacks and impulse shopping. Shoes, bags, you know. The big stuff is his department.”

“You do realize that is exactly what I am, right? Like literally a teenager.” “Shut up, smart ass. Go run and show us all how wonderful you are at it.” “Now who’s the smartass?”

So, I sent a different message: “As long as you’re happy and safe, have fun. I will miss you.” I added, “And when I say miss… I mean, a lot.” She responded with a blushing emoji: “Stay safe, Mav. Don’t let the bed bugs bite *wink*.” “Okay, now I’m scared. What if they create an army and attack me when there’s no one to help me? Do you want me to die alone and lonely?” I sent back, laughing at the absurdity of it, but it was exactly the kind of thing Jasmine would say. And I found I rather liked her quirky humor.