Twisted Funny Dark Quotes Novels & Stories

Cue evil laughter. “Serves you right, you emotionally constipated maniac.”

“Stop shouting, woman. You are wounding my ear.” “Then you put me down.” “That’s not happening. Not in this life.” “I am serious Brian. I am crying. Look at my pathetic situation.” “I know your waterworks are fake as Jim and Dwight’s friendship.” “Did you just give “The Office” reference? And by the way, they become besties after season nine.” “In my eyes, it’s still sham.” “Nobody cares about your outlook.” “Okay, then. Here we go.” “Brian, I can’t swim. And you dare to throw me in the water? I will write your death with my hand. My hands will be red from your blood.”

I can say that I am the most gifted one. "GAHALA!" Humming was shouting my name making Katana glared at her too. "You're too noisy, Humming!" She irritatedly said before walking and leaving us. I looked at Humming and gestured something to her making her tremble and nervous. She snob and fly away from me. I mentally laughed by how pissed off my friends were to me. I love teasing them sometimes---making fun of humming while Katana will sooner going to murder me. When I became all alone. My smile faded and it was replace by seriousness and I alerted myself because I was joking when I told it was just a beer.

smoothie," the dark-skinned said. Elena came back with what they ordered. Elena kept admiring and in love with their accents. "I guess the dark-skinned is London-based. Elena was at the corner of the counter when she overheard them talk about the art on the wall and how beautiful it looked. After some minutes, Elena came back to clear their table. "I'm sorry but this art on the wall is beautiful, do you know who photograph this?" The white girl asked. "I did" Elena replied as she gave in a broad smile. They were both impressed to know Elena was good at photography. "But what are you doing here if you're so good at photography?" The dark girl asked curiously. Elena was quiet. "Okay there's a

"I need a spacious living room, an airy kitchen, and a sex swing." "An air—hold up, what now? Sex what?" "Sex swing," he says, nodding. "For when we entertain. Didn't I mention? We're getting into swinging." I groan, face in my hands. "That has to be the worst joke in the entire world. I'm serious, Scar, I can't decide if I'm offended because of the jab at my parents or offended because it's so lame." "Sorry, couldn't help myself." "Honestly, I've never been less attracted to you right now."

Tears poured down her cheek as she screamed for help, struggling and fighting back. Suddenly, a punch landed squarely on his face, and Marcus stumbled back, releasing his grip on her. He staggered, trying to regain his composure, and stared confused at the tall figure who had punched him. As the figure tried to hit him again, Marcus braced for impact but smirked as Eleanor stopped the punch. He touched his bleeding lips and looked back at her, then at the man, with anger and annoyance. He wagged his fingers at her, his laughter echoing through the dark streets of New York. "This isn't over yet, Elle," he called out, his voice dripping with spite. "You can't hide from me forever. “And when I

Darkous laughed, taking a long draw of his cigarette as he raised an eyebrow, seeming to control his increasing humour. “Don’t begrudge a man for his occupation, besides that shits fun.” His brother chuckled as he lit a Cuban cigar, taking an equally long draw. Darkous shook his head in amusement, unable to disagree with his brother as he spoke, his tone light and bubbly. “I have to be honest brother, that shit is fun.”

do you know how to hurt a girl are you my Vex Mallus Dr Satan Marquis De Sick Nick Nick Dark Officer Remus the Werewolf Dom Sugar Daddy Pit Bull Tommy the Tummy Gutter 5 o'clock Shadow London Cabby Amputee ****** Uncle Surgery Gone Wrong King of the Carpathian Vampires my sweet kissy Kitten ooohh yes i said i am all that for loves sake albeit twisted i am what you crave.. your no taboo lover boy your ******* licking foot slave with a razor in hand a bubble of poison between my legs your homicidal suicidal cockealiciousness she said good, now that we have that settled can we go out for dinner ill be dressed in a jiffy

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said, "I outlived the buggers." Memorable Quotes "Scattered showers my ass!" Noah. "I have no problem with you talking to yourself as long as it doesn't turn into an argument" Woody Allen. "If at first you don't succeed try, try again. Then quit. There's no point being a damn fool about it." W.C.Fields. "The one thing that all porn stars have in common is a dread of filming the scenes that don't involve sex" Fanny Lightfoot (Porn Movie Director) "For every human problem, there is a solution that is simple, neat, and wrong." H. L. Mencken

He crossed his arms while narrowing his eyes at me. Time passed while playing, laughing and revealing a few things about each other which made me late for the office. Just thinking about it gives me a weird feeling. •••••••••••••• 'Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see'. ~Mark Twain. I used this quote in my poem. H.LOCKHART.