Vegetable Puns Novels & Stories

she snapped, realizing he was enjoying teasing her. Bert laughed but stayed beside her as she looked through the vegetables. “How about a big, thick eggplant? Do you like those?” Vangie almost choked. When she turned to him, he was holding up a large eggplant, inspecting it. She forced herself to stay calm. Ignore him, Vangie. Just ignore him. “Vangie, what do you think? Because mine is just like this,” Bert said mischievously. Vangie grabbed the nearest eggplant and smacked him with it.

The nights I cried she would have rubbed soothing circles on my back like she used to when I was younger, fix me some lemon tea while explaining to me that everything happens for a reason but if that was the case why did I take my mother, how could it– “That doesn't even make any sense !” Cas yells drawing me from my thoughts. “How doesn't it make any sense, it has a SEED,” Sydney says “S-E-E-D makes it a fruit not a vegetable so it is not your ‘ famous vegetable soup’ if it has tomatoes in it”. My brother glares at her as if holding back a very nasty reply and instead looks at me and says “as I was saying SISTER” he says glancing back at Sydney very pointedly in which in return she rolls h

I shrug. "Do you eat all kinds of vegetables?" "Kind of. I eat the vegetables I have known about. I don't know about unknown vegetables." "Even green ones?" He puts pressure on the 'green.' "Yup." "That is... really nice." He says, thoughtfully shaking his head. "You don't eat green vegetables?" I ask him back.

But she thinks it's fun to beat me so who am I to take away her fun? She shrugs. "My friend Taylor told me last year. In second grade." She emphasizes the "second" like that's so passé. Even though it was only last year. "Can I try again?" I ask. She huffs. "I guess." "Okay, I've got a good one." He little eyebrow quirks up like she'll believe it when she hears it. "Why was the tomato blushing?" "That's a vegetable joke," she argues putting her hands on her little hips.

How can you be healthy if you only eat meat? Am I going to be his mother now? Hmm, it looks like I need to teach him things he doesn’t know and he hasn’t tasted yet. “Don’t you eat vegetables?” I asked. “Do you think I eat something like that? He asked back and even raised an eyebrow at me. “And I don’t want to eat that now. You might put poison on it!” I almost dropped my jaw because of what he said. Poison? Why would I put poison there? And then where do I get poison? Is it free or do I still need to buy it? I don’t even have money to buy a band aid and now he’s talking about poisons!

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

Most of the time, it was just for her own amusement, and Leif didn’t always play along. But this time, after chewing his food, Leif said, “Alright.” Raina: “…” She was caught off guard. After a moment, she awkwardly tried to keep the conversation going: “…Haha, I think the vegetable patch in the yard could grow some more stuff… How about chili peppers? Then we won’t have to buy spicy food anymore!” Leif’s eyes lit up briefly. “Okay.” Raina rested her chin on her hand, pretending to be thoughtful, then added with a playful smile,

he teases. I spin, steak knife in hand. “Don’t get any ideas. This is the only vegetable you’ll trick me into trying.” “Easy now,” Jackson calms. “Let’s put down the weapon and discuss this.” “There’s nothing to discuss. I eat lettuce, carrots, green beans, corn, pickles, and potatoes. Those are my only vegetables. So, don’t.” I swing the steak knife in his direction. “Don’t try to force any other veggies on me.” I swing the knife in a Zorro-like Z-pattern then drop it into the sink.

Tools of various kinds were strewn across the garden — hoes, rakes, and watering cans. The diligent villagers moved about with purpose, their faces radiant with the joy of contributing to a shared endeavor. As we approached, the villagers greeted us warmly, their faces reflecting a sense of pride in their collective efforts. Children ran between the rows, their curiosity piqued by the prospect of witnessing the growth of the plants they had helped sow. The vibrant hues of vegetables already planted added splashes of color to the garden. Pumpkins nestled next to cucumber vines, and the rich green of potato plants contrasted with the earthy tones of carrots and beetroots.

“Oh— I can, I mean… sure.” Her voice carried that instinct she always had. The one that said: don’t be a burden. Mom smiled like she could hear the thought anyway. “Good,” she said, sliding a cutting board toward her. “Because Noah is useless in a kitchen unless it involves cereal.” I scoffed. “That’s not true.” Mom didn’t even look at me. “Name one vegetable you’ve willingly touched.” “…Potatoes.” “That’s a starch.” Jessa’s laugh slipped out before she could stop it.