Your Momma So Dumb Jokes Novels & Stories

Mom says " Mom I think you should punish him, how can a big man like that not know how to cook" Sia suggests " In that case, I have to punish you as well, because you too can't cook" Mom says " What!!! Mine is different, I am a kid, he's an adult" Sia says and mom burst into laughter " You are right my child"

" How's it my fault? What type of mom are you? You act like you're perfect. You cheated on dad even with all your fake life." " I cheated? Oh my God you're such a fool. Because I cheated on your dad five years ago you thought it was nice to open your legs and do whatever thing you want. I tried to caution you but you're this little slut i tried to mould into perfection. But you're so dumb , really dumb. Who the fuck is responsible!" Mom yells even louder. So mom also swears. Damn, i wish I can hold them apart , hell no , we ain't done. I wish there's a popcorn.

I spent over thirty minutes explaining to my mother and I didn't know whether it was because I told her the house I would live in was only ten minutes away from our house, or because she would miss me. "So what do you think, Mom?” I asked, as my Mom was quiet—and that rarely ever happened. Finally, my Mom spoke. “I think it is a stupid idea to waste money on renting a house when you have a lovely home nearby, but it's alright you are stupid...and unfortunately, you got all your stupidity from me, your late father was a genius." Clearly bored with all he heard, Mason stood and said, “Yo, it is barely four, we still have hours to drink before we go clubbing."

I step two steps closer to him, “It's not like you to run your mouth when you know that you should shut the fuck up.” Then Summer comes up from behind, “Are you idiots making stupid jokes again?” “Why the fuck are you calling us idiots now?” Devan turns around as he faces her. “Cause daddy said you two are worse idiots than Beavis and Butthead.” “What the fuck does your dad know about Beavis and butthead?” “You want me to call you Laurel and Hardy then?” I only but burst out in hysterical laughter, “No, I prefer the one before. Mat has his head up his butt half of the time as it is.”

I told him. Dante and I went further to discuss other stuff. He asked about my sister, my dad, and even called my mom dumb. On a random occasion, I would be sad if anyone called my mom dumb, but when Dante called my mom dumb, I was happy because I felt, for real, that my mom was dumb.

And how did I not notice? I shrugged and put my shirt back on. "Mom glasses, I guess." "Apparently," she sighed. "My little boy's grown up, that's for damn sure. And Ted isn't the only fucking moron around recently, because Gina was a retarded bitch to give that up for Skimbo, the Wonder Twink." I burst out laughing while mom smiled and winked at me while taking a big pull from her beer. Half an hour and three beers each in...

Why call me nerd every damn time ? I hated that word !! “None of your damn business, dumb fvck,” I replied, the anger coming from somewhere else. He smelt like oh gawd, did he sleep with the entire female university population here ? “Wow, you called me dumb. That is the joke of the century,” Lex laughed out loud while slapping his knee dramatically. Drama Queen, ughh !

"Well you always deserved that mom, also the time you were in jail for three hours for whooping my ass!" "Your son takes after you honey. When are you getting here? It's my birthday and I wanna see my favorite daughter." "I thought I was!" two voices shouted. "You are not Amanda is." "Awww thanks mom, you are also my favorite mom." "Dumbass I'm your only mother. Now what time!" I know she is face palming at the moment. "I think about one." "Okay and don't bring me another designer bag or watch or shoes or clothes as a present. Bye"

She waved her hand lightly, the diamonds on her fingers catching the light. “Oh, heavens, don’t look so grim. It was nothing,” she said. “It’s an old joke, that’s all. You know how people say boys can be too much like being wild and dramatic, and how it is exhausting to be a boy mom. So the joke is about how a mother knows she needs so much help to raise them. It’s just something the older generation repeats. Nothing serious.” Her gaze shifted amongst the crowd. “Don’t tell me you don’t know it.”

“Vale!" Shaking my head, I tried to control my laughter. “Her joke, not mine. She’s more crass than I am. She used to derail my dad so bad when he would slip up.” I mimicked my dads voice. “‘Why can’t see what I’m trying to do?’ ‘Because I can’t see you, nitwit.’ His whole argument would go out the window.” Jess laughed. “Christ. I don’t think I could have handled it.” “Seriously though, what are you doing up here?” I looked at her seriously.