Your Momma So Fat Jokes Mga Nobela at Kwento

my mom said. I chuckled. "But honestly, I will miss you mom, your dishes preferably." "Funny young lady." She pinched my cheeks. "Mom…" I moved my face away from her. I massage my cheeks. Damn, it hurts. "Oh, how I loved your fluffy cheeks," she said. "But I imply, you should lessen some fats, sweety. Too much belly fats were too pretty annoying by some handsome jerks." Yeah, I got fluffy cheeks because I'm a chubby pretty girl and it's because of her and her homemade dishes. "Like duh, mom, I'm not entering college for me to have a boyfriend."

"Okay, soldier. Talk to you later then." "Wait, how is the baby?" "Making mommy sick." I chuckle to myself as I remember her hunched over the toilet, definitely not a pretty sight. "Soldier, are you laughing?" "No, I would never laugh at you. How is mommy doing?" "Mommy is getting fat." That chuckle has now turned into a burst of soft laughter that I am not hiding very well. "Now you are really laughing at me." "I am not laughing; I think it is cute."

“My god, this is insane! Are they even humans?” “This is hilarious! She doesn’t even know how much money her family has. How dumb!” “This little angel’s been scheming the whole time. She was trying to turn 8,800 dollars into 880,000 dollars. Why not just rob a bank?” The netizens criticized Emerald and Amelia’s wicked behavior harshly. They even dug up their home address and Amelia’s work place. Well-meaning netizens called Amelia’s company and reported that she had a questioning lifestyle. They demanded that the company fire her.

Then someone in the crowd sneered, their voice dripping with sarcasm. "Oh, that must be Sophia's sugar daddy. Showed up to defend her. She's not picky, is she. She'll take a guy in his fifties." The crowd erupted. Some covered their mouths, laughing. Others joined in openly. "Yeah, I heard she doesn't care about age. Maybe this old man's a regular too." The dean's expression tightened. He turned sharply toward the crowd. "All of you–shut your mouths!" He glanced at my injuries, his voice urgent.

Terrified, I cried and begged Mom to go to the hospital with me for a check-up. The doctor did a thorough examination and said I must've caught it from someone else since I wasn't sexually active. Never in a million years did I imagine that Mom would casually bring it up like it was some kind of joke when Jared came over for the first time. The lively atmosphere instantly froze, and Jared's face went stiff. "Mom, I caught it from someone else. Wasn't the doctor's report clear enough?" I reminded Mom in a low voice. Mom kept talking as if she hadn't heard me.

"Did Vanessa say that the chairman's daughter is a kept mistress? That's the biggest joke I've ever heard!" Right then, Terrence couldn't hold it in any longer and finally let out a cold laugh. "You idiots. This branch office has been losing money year after year. Headquarters has been wanting to investigate for a long time! "If Ms. Monroe hadn't hidden her identity and come down here to dig into your shady accounts herself, how much longer did you think you could keep fooling everyone? "You sure have some nerve making Ms. Monroe serve you coffee, fetch you water, and take the blame for you. How many heads do you think you have to lose?"

“Mom, I want glazed pork ribs for dinner tonight.” “You got it! The second I heard you were coming home, I already went out and bought the best cut of pork.” My mom tucked a stray lock of hair tenderly behind my ear, her eyes filled with heartache. “You’ve become too thin. Starting tomorrow, three meals a day, and you have to finish every single bite.” “Mom, I’m not a pig.” “A pig wishes it were as thin as you.” My dad cut in from the side. “Exactly. Pigs are way rounder than you are.”

"You don’t get my jokes?" "I never get your jokes dad even mom." Dad immediately face mom. "You don’t get my jokes honey?" "No! I do well most of the time." She smile sheepishly. "Tyler, my jokes aren’t that bad right?" I glanced at Tyler and saw him shaking his head. "No, of course not. I find it funny." "See… even Tyler like it." I rolled my eyes. "He’s a liar." I muttered lowly. Dad raised his eyebrow to me. "What’s that?"

She jokes her mom. “Don’t believe on her mommy. She’s the one not getting tired of eating foods.” He defended himself. Anne laugh at him. “I am joking mom. Next week I will not buy anymore as you say so.” She said. “Long time no see dear. How are you than?” she asked Winchester “Did my daughter not lazy in your apartment? Did she do chores too?” she asked. “Seldom mommy she did help me but it’s okay. I know she’s lazy here too.” He jokes.

I said, picking up the call. “Finally I get to hear your voice. For a second there I thought you were dead,” she joked. That was my mother. A woman who loved dark humor to its core. “How is the weather over in the states treating you? Are you okay? Do they serve some of those hamburgers that give cancer?” “Mum, that’s fake news. You don’t need to say that again. Maybe some time you can visit here.” “Sure, maybe when I’m dead,” she laughed as I rolled my eyes.