Funny Adult Jokes Novels & Stories

We started eating and just talk about music and his lame pick-up lines that I admit sells me. “I have a joke” he said while having a big bites on his bake mac. "What?" "What do you call a fat bee?" "What?" "CHUB-BEE zzz zzzz" I smile at his failed joke but he laughs with laughter it looks like he enjoyed his jokes before. "You know you just ate there so we could go home" he laughed and continued eating and so did I. After we east he paid the bills and drove me home. "See you tomorrow," I said as he looked out the window of his car.

Max smiles, “You build blanket forts, you tell jokes, you know how to ballroom dance.” “I don’t tell jokes,” I explain. “Chad said you do. Lucy told him some of the jokes. It made them laugh,” Max replies. Curious, he asks, “Could I hear one?” I shake my head, “It was corny jokes to cheer her up is all. It was, “Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.” Things most kids hear on a playground.” Max looks disappointed. Taking a deep breath, I say, “A cheeseburger walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”.”

A group of thugs dragged me into an alley. In a panic, I called my boyfriend thirty-nine times, only to have him decline every single call. My whole body trembled as I struggled desperately to break free. Just as they were about to strip me naked, laughter suddenly erupted around me. One by one, they removed their masks and caps. I looked up stiffly and saw that every one of them was someone close to me. My younger brother, Caleb Bennett, scoffed. "This is hilarious, sis. You should've seen the look on your face. Did you seriously think someone was stalking you?" My older brother, Adrian Bennett, teased, "How are you still this easy to scare after all these years?" My best friend, Maya Grant

"Hahahahaha I swear your expression is so funny, like the complex moms whose husbands cheat on each other." Again he managed to trick her, Green desperately wanted to stab the man with a kitchen knife in her hand at the same time, if it was not forbidden, Green would do now. "The joke's weird, it's not funny at all." Langit tried to stop his laughter, and it had been long he didn't laugh loudly like today, his heavy things lifted with the laughter echoing in the room. "Green..., thank you." Langit spoke softly after stopping his laughter. "Why? For instant noodles?"

He said this to me while stuttering and sweating profusely on his palm. I paused for a moment before smiling because I suddenly remembered an old joke. "What makes fowl so amusing?" Arthur arched his brow and couldn't come up with an answer. I cleared my throat and imitated how fowls make noise. "Becauseeeeee!!" I declared, making both of us laugh out loud.

We were acting like a human couple on their first dates, I thought. "Care to share the joke?" He continued with his bored look. "I hope I'm not in it." I covered a giggle and then straightened myself to give a serious reply. "I just thought of a funny joke. That's all." "Enlighten me." He leaned back and smiled a challenge at me. I searched my memory for all the jokes I have heard or read, found one and cleared my throat. "Okay, here goes: what do you do when a werewolf eats your candy?"

He looked confusedly at me “Wait…no way you think you think you’re a god, “ I said to be sure he wasn’t serious And if he was then this man might need some professional help with his ego “I’m kidding “ he laughed while I just started at him blankly “Oh come on. You have to admit that was good “ he nudged me “ you’ve only told a good joke once , hopefully that could increase “ I rolled my eyes “That’s a lie. I’m a naturally funny person, I’m good at telling jokes “ he argued “Yeah, bad jokes “ I sassed and he laughed “See that’s how to be funny. Not by telling weird, scary or just totally off….” I rambled “ yeah, blah blah blah. Just shut the fuck up and kiss me “ he cut me off, tightening hi

"Pregnancy has become disadvantage to you, Kitcat...I bet he'll tell you the grass is too green for you to step outside tomorrow." "Shut up, Liam. I'm not trying to make jokes." "And see...your pregnancy has become a disadvantage to me too...look at him snapping at me because of a fetus." "I'd advise you to shut your mouth, Liam...his face is getting red, it's about to swell...he's transforming into..." "Angry bird!" Liam and Fredd bursted out into hysterical laughing at their apparently funny joke...but Zillon didn't seem to find it funny, he was as serious as judge. "F*cking idiots..."

Life’s so unfair, man. “What does a spoon matter when we’re literally stuck in the middle of the woods with invisible monsters, shady, bad men and whatever else creeps around here? Can you please, for once, use your brain and kick some sense in the gear?” He whisper-hisses, so red in the face, he reminds me of a tomato. “You could join a casting for vegetable commercials looking like this,” I remark and laugh at the brilliant joke my brain just reacted. Shit, am I not the funniest guy out there? Look at me - sense of humor, looks, body and an impressive spoon collection, I have it all, damn it. No wonder my little vixen couldn’t deny me.

“Don’t you mean fangtastic?” “I most assuredly do not.” His face was now stern. I rolled my eyes. “OK, got it. Dick jokes are OK but vampire jokes are not. Touchy much?” His mouth was drawn in a thin line “Funny jokes are acceptable. Others should be met with the derision they deserve.” There was a pregnant pause and all silly jokes and puns rushed out of my head, so I settled for rolling my eyes at him as I jumped off the bar stool instead. “Do you have anyone you need to let know you’ll be away?” he asked