Pampering Myself Quotes

I haven't had my period in two months, and my mom assumes I must be pregnant. So, she marches me off to see a doctor. Of all people, the doctor on duty turns out to be my ex—the one I dumped two months ago. His face betrays nothing, his voice icy as he says, "Lie on the exam table. Lift your shirt and pull your pants down." When I don't follow his instructions quickly enough, he impatiently pulls my pants down himself. But once the curtain is drawn, he takes off his glasses and hovers over me. "We didn't even go all the way. So, why haven't you had your period in two months?"

After discovering that my sworn enemy was an incubus, I threatened him. "Marty, as long as you let me touch your tail, I'll keep your secret." Marty was both ashamed and furious, but in the end, with his face burning red, he still shoved his tail into my hand. Biting his lip in reluctant humiliation, he said, "We agreed—only once a day. Not a single touch more." But later, the very man who had insisted on "only once a day" knelt on the floor, crying as he begged me to touch it again, just one more time.

Tessa Langley accidentally stumbled upon the scene of her crush, Lorcan Steele, mapping out his intended future with another woman after he rejected her confession. To make things worse, her family had gone into bankruptcy overnight. Depressed and heartbroken, she decided to fly overseas. Ten years later, Tessa makes a comeback to her home country. Unexpectedly, she ends up reuniting with Lorcan once again at work. To think that the pathetic teenager from back then is now the decisive and ruthless business mogul who has major influence over the entertainment industry… At first, Tessa doesn't want to have anything to do with Lorcan. But he keeps causing her trouble at work no matter what she does. Feeling furious and helpless at the same time, all Tessa can do is insult Lorcan time and again. This dynamic goes on until Lorcan sustains heavy injuries after he protects Tessa in a car accident that's staged by an unknown mastermind. As Tessa takes care of Lorcan, they begin unraveling the misunderstandings that had once separated them, thus revealing the truth. It turns out that Lorcan has been secretly helping Tessa this whole time. He even helps her uncover who the actual murderer of her father is. However, Tessa feels really guilty for insulting Lorcan in the past, so she tries to flee. At the airport, Lorcan stops her from boarding her flight before confessing his feelings to her. The two of them finally get together as a couple after going through far too much drama in life.

My boyfriend tells me he's a monster in a game, but I think he's lying. What monster would have washboard abs and defined obliques? And what monster would keep asking me for hugs and kisses? Everything changes when I end up in a survival game one day. I'm stuck in a dark, cold ocean when the main boss of the game, a scary tentacled monster, entangles me in its grasp. When it speaks, the voice is gentle and familiar. "Kiss me, Ara."

After an 800-meter run, I hide under the blanket to use the vibrating massager. At that moment, Uncle Theo barges into my room and asks coldly, "Does it feel that good?" I nod vigorously. The massage really does feel wonderful. Later, he yanks off his tie and uses it to bind my wrists. "It's too small and slow. Try me instead." I can only stare at him in bewilderment. But Uncle Theo, it's just a massage gun!

I woke up inside a novel, and not even as an important character. I became a pretty background extra in a smut novel. My brother, however, was the only normal person in the entire story. His character setting was the one man the soft, delicate heroine could never win over. He was the cold, unattainable Prince Charming she could never conquer. When the heroine cried and confessed her love, he was studying. When she offered him her whole heart and body, he was busy starting a company. When she spiraled into scandals and nightlife, he was already a billionaire, calm and untouchable. I thought he would live a quiet, ascetic life forever. Until one night, I walked in on him at midnight… holding a piece of clothing I recognized all too well, murmuring a name over and over, a name so familiar that my scalp tingled.

When I open my eyes again, I notice that I'm lying on the bed of my archnemesis, Ashton Ford. Ashton calmly puts on his clothes before tossing a card at me, telling me to get out. He then looks at the caretaker stationed by the door and asks helplessly, "Is Sunny still throwing a tantrum? Tell her that we're going to be engaged soon. She can't leave women in my bed just because she's angry." I'm about to say something when a stream of comments appears before my eyes. "Here comes another one hoping to sleep her way into a prestigious position. Mr. Ford only loves Sunny. If she didn't comfort him, he might have taken his own life after what happened to Elizabeth a long time ago." "Can the author stop trying to force these flings onto him? It wasn't easy for Sunny to achieve success after taking over as the female lead. I want to see them live a sweet married life." "Unless Mr. Ford's dead first love, Elizabeth Miller, comes back to life, no one can possibly touch Sunny's position in Mr. Ford's heart." Confusion is written all over my face. I'm Elizabeth Miller. Since when did I become Ashton's first love?

I can't believe that my online boyfriend is actually my boss, Yoel Gilmore, who refutes me at all times during my work hours! So, I purposefully complain on the chat app, saying that my "boss" wants me to burn the midnight oil just to get a proposal done immediately. Almost immediately, I see my company's group chat updating with a new message that says, "A one-day extension has been given." Afterward, I claim that I "want to quit my job because the food at the cafeteria sucks". On the very same day, the company makes a decision to increase the cafeteria meals' portions without hiking up the price. I'm also given an increase in bonus. In the end, I say I want to break up with him because I can't hug him in real life. But I end up getting taken to the CEO's office, where I hear him telling me in a choked-up tone, "I'll let you hug and kiss me. Can we please not break up?"

After losing a round of truth or dare, Ezra Everton pointed at me from across the room like it was nothing. "Her. The brokest girl at the whole art institute. For fun." The room exploded with laughter. Everyone waited for me to get dumped on the spot and humiliated. I was already about to tell him to go screw himself when bright red floating comments suddenly blew up in front of me— [Don't say no! Say yes! That's a walking jackpot!] [Make his heart race for one second and you'll unlock a $100,000 payout!] [I'm screaming. Ezra's family is crazy rich. One tiny leak from his wallet could build a whole new wing for Evervale Home!] [For real. He acts arrogant, but he's secretly such a softie. Win him over, and you're basically set for life!] Evervale Home. The orphanage. A hundred grand? My eyes widened. I looked at Ezra's ridiculously handsome—seriously punchable—face and swallowed the "go to hell" sitting on my tongue. Then I met his amused stare and smiled sweetly, hiding the edge in my eyes. I stepped up and hooked my arm through his. "Sure, babe."

After eating a poisonous, hallucination-inducing mushroom, I genuinely thought I’d woken up inside a spicy erotica novel. I was the heroine—a live-in housekeeper working for a rich heir, the kind of impossibly handsome, impossibly wealthy man who only exists in fiction. When I opened my eyes and saw him standing there, I felt… oddly disappointed. I muttered under my breath, “Only six guys? What, do I need to take Sundays off?” The heir let out a short, disbelieving laugh. A slow, dangerous one. “If I’d known you were this bold,” he said, “I wouldn’t have bothered being gentle.” The moment the hallucination faded, I grabbed his sleeve and practically burst into tears. “Honey, I’m sorry. I swear I didn’t mean any of that.” He loosened his tie with maddening calm and murmured, “Relax. No one here takes Sundays off. And if you’re that eager to follow the plot of your little erotica novel… we can start right now.”