Sarcastic Witty Quotes Novels & Stories

She did have a thing for dealing with every situation with sarcasm. His eyebrow went up unable to read the sarcasm in her voice. He wondered why that would be a reason for her to shed tears. "Why would that make you cry? It's not your fault, it's just the way pigs were made" he said with seriousness as if he was teaching a kindergarten. Jessica couldn't believe that he thought that was why she was crying. His childishness and naivety made her wonder. How could a grown man who headed a company does not even know when she was being sarcastic?

He laughs but shuts up. “Ok, listen, while we are on the topic of quotes, I have some funny, sarcastic ones,” he says and opens his phone to read some. “Two wrongs, don’t make a right, take your parents as an example,” I laugh. I can use it on anyone who messes with my friends. “Tell me more,” I urge him. “Even people who are good for nothing can bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs,” I chuckle.

Crayvin's brows furrow as he retorts, "Does your ass ever get jealous of the amount of shit that comes out of your mouth?" I smirk, trying to cover my irritation, but I'm pretty much translucent. He probably knows how much he irritates me. "Nope, it's just sarcasm, honey," I say with my innocent voice, before adding, "But I apologize. Sarcasm just happens to fall out of my mouth like stupidity falls out of yours."

Can you believe it? “Wow! You know sarcasm is a sign of a healthy brain, good, you’re already fine!” I chirped as I could not digest this happiness. By his dangerous aura, I thought he would even behave like a killer but here he is taunting me. Amazing! I mean not the taunt! For a response, he just stares at me. “You’re looking at me like I’m eating your brain.” I muttered, putting my bag next to me. “You look like one.” I heard him muttering. I just shake my head in defeat. Seriously, he is way too sarcastic.

This caused Singto to gasp and drop his jaw from the shock of it all. Krist bit insides of his mouth to keep himself from laughing at the way Singto looked right now. “Oh… my… goodness…” “Oh, sorry did I get you? Man, I really didn’t mean to.” There goes the infamous sarcasm again. But Singto didn’t mind it, he was actually still laughing, but now for a different reason. He has a self-deprecating sense of humor and nine times out of then, you’d find Singto just laughing at his own mistakes and clumsiness. This works out perfectly with Krist too since he doesn’t take his sarcasm and dry humor personally, instead he just simply laughs about it.

] /All the time? [Each and every thought.] /... I see. Well, what use is this skill you speak of when I can't do anything to change what is bound to happen?/ [That's for you to figure out.] /And I'm saying-! Ah, nevermind. ... ... By the way, you do realise that my comment about you being smart was me being sarcastic, right?/ [Sarcastic?] After a short pause, the system mumbled. [So that's sarcasm…]

“Thanks, Nate. I mean it.” “You’ll figure it out,” I said. “And when you do, I want naming rights on your next signature cocktail.” He laughed for real this time. “Only if it includes your bitter personality and a splash of self-righteousness.” We both chuckled. “You're an asshole, you know that.” I retorted. He shrugged like I just stated a fact, “Learnt form the best.” And like that the gloominess lifted and my sarcastic, down to earth, best friend was back in the room.

I shook my head and went to sit across Audrey. She was laughing at the quotes on the wall. “These are hilarious,” she said, reading one aloud: ‘I don’t need you to brag about me, I just don’t want you to deny me in front of people. – FART!’ Her laughter burst out, filling the café. I just stared, completely captivated. Every laugh, every sparkle in her eyes, it was contagious. “Here’s another one!” she giggled. ‘What a life! Eggs every single day… eggs, eggs, eggs… Do you know who said that?’ Her eyes gleamed mischievously.

Well, I fucking opened myself up to that one. “As a solution to a problem I in part caused,” I say emotionlessly. “I’m going to assume by the vague answer, you don’t wish to discuss it.” “You’re very astute for a human,” I commend her. Her face slips into an emotionless mask, “Yes, we mere mortals are quite astute. We’ve also mastered fire and invented the wheel,” she says sarcastically. “Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit you know.” “At least one of us has some,” she says, taking another sip of her drink.

he replied with a sarcastic remark so good I laughed. "That's funny??" he asked me, smirking. "Nope, but it's funny seeing you giving jokes a try babe, it's still not your thing," I said to him sweetly not to hurt his ego but to be honest, it was honestly true, I did think he was a hottie with good jokes, just sometimes, you got to break their ego a little, it helped put them in their place.