Vampires Funny Novels & Stories

Then he smiled softly, “A vampire! They are here again! I think I need to find one, what do you think?” I find what he said to be hilarious, especially since I have no idea what he was talking about. Because I already felt that he had lost his mind, I responded, "Vampire? Vampires never exist. Can you please stop spewing gibberish? It's possible that I'll start to think you've lost your mind!"

~Godfrey's Point of View~ I was led to a library, no doubt filled with things pillaged illegally, but I wasn’t here for that. I tried my best not to be a rat at any rate. “Now there’s a relic if I ever saw one,” I heard a very thick accented voice say. Vampires often have an incredibly dry sense of humor that really isn't even humor at all.

We consequently yelled, raising our glasses like some sort of pact. "To us, the pole strippers" She yelled as she laughed, rather loudly. "That gives us away too easily" I replied. "-the vamps" Jacq interrupted, hefting her glass a second time. "Too cliché" Wu eye rolled, bringing out her stash of blow. "Well, we can certainly cheer to one thing" I said as i held up her glass. "None of our lives is really a cliché" "To us, the vamps" I raised my glass again with a smile.

She jumped and clapped her hands "No! Yes!" I and the boys chorused. I guess you all know who said Yes. Me! It would be hilarious watching their facial expressions. "Why not?" Ash asked with a frown. "Yeah why not?" I looked at them with a smirk "It's just stupid" Lexus scoffed. Making me giggle. "What's so funny " Caleb asked eye brows raised. "You think Vampires are stupid?" I asked "No we think werewolves are" Damian said. And my wolf growled deeply.

“We sacrifice a few virgins. If that isn’t enough, we slay some puppies but nothing too taxing.” He had a sense of humor. I would never have guessed. It was something else I doubted many people saw. I had to ask myself why I was one of the few. Was it all a lie? Vampires could not be trusted, I reminded myself. I went with the theme though. “That’s all? You don’t run over a grandmother or two for good measure?” “How remiss of me not to mention the grannies. I thought it might be one step too far.”

And she smiled and laughed at her colleagues. I am about to leave to go home, and going to Palmora’s Mansion. "Oh! Are you in a hurry, Vara? Why? Do you become a vampire at night?" And they laughed out loud. I just look at them as if I am bored. "What if, yes? I become a vampire at nightfall and I suck blood... fresh blood!" And I pulled out my two tiny fangs that stuck to the side of my tooth as if I am truly a vampire just to scare them.

You have no idea how good this is. “Oh, I have an idea.” Sam grinned, his fingers gently trailing over my leg. Lucifer suddenly appeared at the table, his hands resting between us as he leaned forward, looking dazed. “I think I’ll stay here,” he declared. “Do you like being around vampires?” I asked, intrigued. “They’re much more fun than demons,” Lucifer said with a drunken laugh. “Demons are always so serious. Vampires, though, they’re actually funny.” “Well,” I tapped the table playfully, “you can take one home.”

assistant"> Seeing blood instead of tears flowing from a vampire's eyes left Jane in shock. She had always wondered whether a vampire could ever cry. Ever since learning of their existence, they had always seemed like creatures incapable of shedding tears, as though sadness never manifested the same way it did for humans. Yet somehow, it seemed they could cry after all. Not with ordinary tears though, but with thick crimson blood that slowly streaked down their cheeks. Somehow, the sight looked even more heartbreaking than actual tears, making it difficult for her to look away.

This time, Emily raised her head and looked him in the eye before repeating her question, “What about the Vampires! Are they real too?” “Oh? Oh! Yes, yes, they are very real and creepy. But they don’t sparkle like those stupidos show it in the TV. In reality, vampires burn in the sun” Brian rolled his eyes. He and Ralph always rolled his eyes every time, to the fact that they show vampire in a positive light to be such a mushy creature who sparkle in the sun.

Lucian "And why the full moon?" He let's out a mocking smile. "Pure coincidence, don't confuse us with those stupid hounds!" Stupid hounds? I think back to the conversation we had about the wolf I saw. He made fun of me, hitting at the fact that it as a werewolf. I thought he was just joking! So as well as vampires and witches, there are also supernatural dogs? And then what, fairies, aliens, and unicorns? It's getting ridiculous!