Vampires Funny Novels & Stories

Shada glared at Demian as if to say 'isn't that right? "But you are a vampire, Demian." She hissed reminding Demian. Demian laughed again while looking the other way, unable to see how ridiculous Shada was being. He laughed as he held back his jet-black hair that was whipped by the wind. Right now Demian looked very handsome to Shada. "You are so funny, Shada. Vampires are not ghosts. We are like humans who have activities too. The difference is, we are more special." Demian's laughter erupted again.

What on earth happened in that old mansion, I had been so shaken, I’d even forgot my bra? Poppy and the other laughed, “Lea, did you really go to Daffy yesterday or you went somewhere else?” “What?” I jerked up when I heard this. “Em…. I..actually….” “You actually used Daffy as an excuse to go meet your boyfriends?” She barked, “So who gave you those love bites huh? Don’t tell me it’s from a nurse or a ghost from the morgue?” Poppy sneered. I slowly touched my neck through the embarrassment and realized the marks the vampire I murdered were still on me.

No one would take my trophy. "All this flattery will make me blush. Are you by chance trying to butter me up so I spare you? Let me just tell you, it won't work. I have no plans of letting you walk out of here alive." He laughed, a hearty, resonant sound that was oddly pleasing to the ear. Sometimes I had to remind myself that vampires didn't cackle like fairytale villains, they charmed you before they tore your throat out.

A paled skin, cold-blooded entity, child of the night, blood sucking creature with rigid sharp fangs- your best friend, is a vampire. This is too much. Even for you. Why do you suddenly have the urge to laugh? And it's not the kind of laugh where you'd think something was funny or amusing though. It's the kind of laugh that signals the distress of the mind. It's leaning towards the side of a psychotic one. "Wow." You can't help but whisper after hearing her side of the story. Indeed, this is all too much for you to take in. And it hasn't even been twenty four hours since you've got here.

The anger that once lingered in his eyes was replaced with sadness. “He was my first friend in this lifetime,” he said slowly. “I told myself I wasn’t going to have any more human friends after the last few died. But this guy always had a way of making others laugh, including me. He convinced me to go bar hopping with him and I had to pretend to be drunk…” “Vampires can’t get drunk?” I asked, raising my brows. He shook his head. “Not like humans can,” he answered. “Noah was easy to get along with and women loved him.

I heard that vampires can compel someone. Does that mean that holy water and garlic can scare them away? If that's the case, I need to find those items quickly. Light laughter snapped me out of my trance, a cute lady with white-blonde hair appeared in the doorway gazing at me mockingly. A vampire, I can tell she's one of them. "Lol, yes I'm a vampire, and no, garlic, holy water doesn't scare us away dear hahaha, that's the funniest thing I've heard in fifty years."

I hissed. "Nope. What is that?" playing dumb again. "Go look in the dictionary..." I mumbled. "Ooooooh but I love it so much when you act so smart!" He was enjoying himself so much while I was dying on the inside. By now Haydon was so close to me I could feel the heat from skin radiating off of him...wait. Heat.... vampires were only warm after they fed. As soon as I realised this, I shivered in disgust. "So who was the unfortunate human?" I asked

I looked around to see the other boys lying similarly on the ground. “Ha….Ha….ha…ha….ho…ho….ho…..” A burst of evil laughter resounded in the forest. I wondered who was laughing? Who could be so brutal and heartless to laugh at the death of so many people? He was a psychopath for sure. I hadn’t even seen the cruelest Vampires behave in this manner. Their eyes would flash with regret each time they killed someone. “ Boring! Very boring. You guys do the same thing every time. How I wish vampires were around. Dealing with human beings is yawnsome but I will try to spice it up. What can I make you do? Ummmm…..”

one asked and they laughed. “Do you think you can handle us all?” asked one of the female vampires. “What do you think, girl?”, my classy reply. “I didn’t become a werewolf just to be defeated by sucking vampires like you!” I added. My words draw annoyance and anger on the faces of the vampires as if at any second they will rush. “You’re too arrogant!” returned the first man to emerge. “Well, if that’s your opinion, go ahead!” my annoying reply to him, then cracked up.

She made a croaking sound. "I'm just kidding. I'm excellent. Because the tornado dissipated so quickly, we are not in danger." What I stated earlier is now retracted. "Yeah, yeah. Goodbye." The "end" button was pressed by her. I'm bored. When Celes is anxious, she hates it when people make fun of her, but I find it quite amusing to annoy her.