You So Dumb Jokes

My name is Hazel Falken, and I am the only daughter of the Base Commander during the apocalypse. Even though it is the apocalypse, I am still spoiled left and right by my family and raised to be their little princess at home. My dad, Ernest Falken, is worried that I will marry into a family that will mistreat me. So, he decides to choose four husband candidates and bring them up in our own home for me to pick from when I'm older. In my past life, I chose Curtis Granger, whom I have liked for a long while, when Dad asked me to pick my husband. However, not long after our marriage, Curtis volunteers himself as a guard to be stationed outside the base perimeter. He never returns home after that, and I am left living as a widow in the safety of the base's inner district. 30 years later, when my hair has turned fully white, I decide that I can't wait for him anymore and go out to find him. I then realize that he has formed another family outside the base without my knowing. It then dawns on me that Curtis never liked me. He had also only married me because he wanted to repay Dad for bringing him up. Not long after that, a wave of zombies attacks us. Curtis pushes me down and shields me under his body. "Hazel, I know that I never should've lied to you. I'll give up my life to repay the kindness that Commander Falken has shown to me. "But if there is a next life, I hope that you won't pick me again." When I open my eyes again, I find out that I have travelled back in time to the day when Dad asks me to pick my husband. "Hazel, these four people are my right-hand men. Whom would you like to pick as your husband?"

The day Noelle Rutherford finds out she's pregnant, she braves the rain to go to a club that Chester Gray frequents. She stands outside a private room and pats her soaked hair dry with some tissues, wanting to surprise him when his get-together ends. Through the ajar door, she hears laughter. "Chester, your wedding to Noelle is in a week. Is your surprise for her ready?" "Of course," Chester says, his usually cool voice laced with tipsiness. "I'll make it a memory she'll never forget." Noelle pauses, and her lips curve upward in a sweet smile. Throughout her three years with Chester, he has truly cherished her like a treasure and loved her with all his heart. "Ha! Do you think she'll have a meltdown and lose her mind on the big day when she finds out I've been toying with her while pretending to be you this whole time?" Someone laughed. "She'd never in her wildest dreams imagine that Chester has an identical twin brother! When she finds out her boyfriend's brother has been playing her for three years…"

Don’t trust anyone, not even yourself….You think you know someone pretty well, until you’re awoken in the middle of the night to the sound of unfamiliar voices and realize your sister’s being swept away by some supernatural creatures who climb in and out of windows and leap from two-story houses like it’s nothing.My parents tried to tell me everything was fine, but when Cadence finally did come back from wherever they’d taken her, I knew there was something unusual about my older sister.Now, her best friend is dead.Her ex-boyfriend is acting bizarre.And I’m afraid I might be next.My name is Cassidy Findley, and I’m pretty sure my sister is a vampire, despite her “co-worker” making every effort to brainwash me into believing otherwise. With the help of my two best friends, we vow to get to the bottom of this before it’s too late, and my sister starts to claim other victims. I love her, but I won’t be turned, nor will I just sit by without doing everything I can to stop her. I can only hope that I’m not too late and that I can trust my own memories.Because I’m pretty sure my sister’s friends are coming for me next.The Chronicles of Cassidy is a retelling of The Clandestine Saga specifically for young adult/teen readers told from the perspective of high schooler Cassidy Findley.

After a brutal, heart wrenching family split, Tiana Williams began to unveil life as parent's divorce pushed her into the limelight in a school where she was socially inexistent. Nothing is warmer than the bad boy with a sweet heart caring for the quite nerd. Her new phase of life cracks a wall for Blake Anthony to creep in. She felt getting high over everything as she thought she lost it all, not knowing she just started. A young teenager with low knowledge of life starts analysing and making life decisions recklessly. It didn't go well, it wasn't so nice, it was more than a disaster. Little did she know that she had many things left from her first loss. So Nice#ProjectNigeria

I've been with Giovanni Rossi for ten years. In fact, I'm the only lover he has. During countless nights of passion, he promised me that he'd marry me as soon as he became the Don of his family. But on the night he sits on the throne, he decides to cast me out for the sake of my replacement, Lisa Esposito. "Selena, she's different from you. You can stay as my secret lover, but she needs an official title. Lisa has been living in a clean world. The love she has for me is pure as well. She's just like you when you were 19 years old." After that, Giovanni gets down on one knee and puts on a pair of ballet flats onto Lisa's feet in a tender manner. As I step out in the heavy downpour, I never look back. What Giovanni doesn't know is that Vincenzo Bellini, the strongest Don of the mafia world, has been waiting for me for the past ten years with a crown in his hands.

I sponsored Emily Fagan from an underprivileged background just to help her get through school. She was good-looking but wasn't exactly the brightest. Despite my warning not to tamper with my things, she slipped stimulants into my water bottle. Thanks to her, I was accused of cheating in the swimming competition. Our team's score was nullified. As for me, I was banned from competing for life and kicked out of college. When I confronted her, she cried pitifully, "Julie, I just wanted you to win. I didn't know that'd happen." My boyfriend, Elijah Strauss, held her and comforted her. He even snapped at me, claiming, "Em had good intentions. Why are you giving her a hard time?" Crushed, I shut myself in at home. Feeling sorry, she and Elijah visited me and brought along some vodka as an apology. After I took ten shots, I asked her to buy some over-the-counter pain relievers for my splitting headache. Little did I know that she'd make me take a dangerous dose of Ibuprofen mixed with alcohol. The bleeding in my stomach was what killed me. Emily looked pitifully remorseful at the hospital. "I'm so sorry. I couldn't even tell what I shouldn't have given her…" During the police interrogation, my boyfriend gave false testimony to protect her. He accused me of taking my own life by mixing Ibuprofen and alcohol because I couldn't handle the mental stress from cheating in the competition. When I reopened my eyes, I found out that I was transported to the day before the competition.

My usually cold and distant wife shared a bowl of soup with her newly joined colleague. Surprisingly, I felt calm, even as I brought up divorce. She sneered at me, "Don't be ridiculous. I'm exhausted. He's just a colleague of mine." "Even if we're married, you have no right to interfere with what I do with my colleagues." "If that's what you think, then I can't help you." When I actually put the divorce papers in front of her, she flew into a rage. "Ryan, do you think the Wagners were still what they used to be? You're nothing without me!"

Four sisters sat on the kitchen floor in a circle each holding their favorite icecream tub and started discussing their heart problems. Rude but not so... Rude Badboy but not so... Badboy Player but not so... Player Jerk but not so... Jerk "Why do we all have such an amazing selection in the boys?" Asked both the twins at a time looking at their elder sisters. "We will definitely note the sarcasm." added the middle sister for them. "Don't worry dears! This is not the end and we will find someone else for sure. That is life which goes on and on and on." assured the elder sister. Well we will also see how they will get out of this Not so... Cliché lives, but will they?

ผู้หญิงคนนั้นคือคนที่ผมกำลังชอบ ผู้หญิงอีกคนคือรักแรกแล้วก็อยู่ในใจมาตลอด ส่วนผู้หญิงคนนี้คือ...ของเล่นคั่นเวลา

เฮียไฟเป็นพี่ชายข้างบ้านของดาว ด้วยความใจดีของเฮียไฟที่มีให้ดาวมาตั้งแต่เด็กทำให้ดาวหลงรักเฮีย แต่เฮียก็ชอบย้ำอยู่ตลอดว่าดาวคือน้องสาว ปากก็บอกน้องสาว แต่การกระทำของเฮียทำให้ดาวคิดไปไกล แต่แล้ววันหนึ่งความสัมพันธ์ของเราก็เปลี่ยนไป “ไม่ใช่ว่าดาวแย่ แต่ดาวเป็นเหมือนน้องสาวเฮียนะ เฮียคิดกับดาวแค่น้องเท่านั้น เมื่อคืนเฮียเมาดาวก็เห็น ทำไมดาวยัง…” “นี่เฮียกำลังโทษดาวงั้นเหรอ” เขากำลังบอกเพราะฉันเข้าไปเสือกใช่ไหม “ก็ถ้าดาวไม่เข้ามายุ่ง ผู้หญิงที่เฮียนอนด้วยต้องไม่มีวันเป็นดาว” “ใช่ ดาวผิดเองแหละ ถ้าดาวไม่เสือก ดาวก็คงไม่ต้องเจ็บแบบนี้ เฮีย…ดาวถามจริง ๆ นะ เฮียโง่หรือแกล้งโง่ถึงมองไม่ออกว่าดาวระ…” “อย่าพูดมันออกมา เฮียไม่อยากฟัง เฮียเห็นดาวเป็นน้องมาตลอด เฮียไม่เคยคิดเกินเลยกับดาว”