You So Dumb Jokes Novels & Stories

“Almost let me question my judgement for following you, but it’s you, so…” Jai frowned. “That’s almost twice. What does that even mean?” “Sometimes when you have a stupid friend who does stupid things, you wonder why would that person do stupid things. Especially since that certain friend knows it’s stupid. But since you remember that your friend is stupid, so him doing stupid things is actually no wonder. And then you realize that you almost question something that’s plainly obvious, which is also stupid—if you actually wonder about it, which makes you also stupid.”

I said to him, throwing tantrums like a child. "Damn, Nola. I didn’t know you were dumb!" he said and sighed. He massaged his temples before looking at me again. And what did he say? Me? Dumb? I leaned back a little and held my chest dramatically. "Wow! Me? Dumb? Who's better at choosing fish, huh?"

“That was... something.” He didn’t even flinch. “Tough crowd,” he muttered under his breath. Tough crowd? Was this a boardroom or open mic night? --- Then came the coffee break. I’d barely made it to the break room when he cornered me with another one of his “brilliant” jokes. “What do you call a sad cup of coffee?” he asked, his voice dripping with enthusiasm. Against my better judgment, I played along. “What?” “A depresso.”

Well, Dillon could agree with that, for sure. "You talk like the worn out joke 'Time to get a watch' has contributed to the advancement of modern society and culture." Dillon scoffed. "Tell me it ain't a classic joke! That's why it's been so grievously overused since the beginning! Duh, idiot!" "Ugh! I can picture yer beer gut and toupeé already, Daddy!"l "Remember earlier today, when I said I knew you were gonna be insufferable? SHIT, DUDE! I think I'm a psychic!" Tony exclaimed in mock revelation.

I shrug my shoulders and look down at the kid, "What do you want to do Keith?" He's too engrossed in his thoughts to even listen to me. Kids these days. "Maybe we should get him some building blocks or something? Kids like this stuff right?" Soul questions anxiously. "Wow Solomon, have I ever told you how smart you are?" My voice dripping with sarcasm. Soul frowned in confusion, "No?" I shook my head, obviously Soul didn't pick up my joke, "Yeah, well, there's a reason for that." I see Soul connecting the dots. His eyes widen as he scowls at me"Hey!"

He grins. “One moment they are ‘fuck you youngest child’ and in the next they want us to produce the next population of the country. It’s like ‘make up your mind will ya? Are we important or not?’”, He continues joking, eyes lighting up when he hears me chuckle a second time. “Yeah, literally”, I agree, having to lower my eyes. I feel far too ashamed. I not only chuckled at one of his jokes, but at two of them. And I did so because I actually found them funny.

I fell on my delicate butt cheeks and even the dumbest person in the world would know how painful that is. Dylan, just like I expected, started laughing. Is he fucking serious? I just fell on my butt guys! My butt! I guess the dumbest person in the world didn't figure out how painful it was. Then I connected the dots, everything fell into place. The warm this was his chest and the scent came from him which means, I was burying my head into his chest all along! Are you fucking kidding me! "You're literally the dumbest person I know" He said as he starred down at me. Couldn't blame him. The only talent he had was to throw rude remarks.

She hissed, “we need to leave immediately!” “Alright, alright.” I patted her arm. “I’ll just get the eggplants.” I turned and beamed widely at the worried girl. “Have you seen a brinjal this big and shiny?! It’s like—.” “A cock soaked in cum,” someone said. What...? My face feel deadpanned as it swivelled up to voice. An elderly man in Einstein’s age and appearance was bellowing in laughter at his own dirty joke, his round belly shaking uncontrollably.

It might help if I get lost…or accidentally set the apartment on fire,” I teased, getting a hint of a smile that he buried by denying. "Or you'll probably starve the poor animal to death," he returned the joke, narrowing his gaze, making the lines of expression visible at the corners of his eyes. Since the incident in my bathroom we acquired the ability to joke when it came to Alzheimer's. Black jokes made the situation less overwhelming. He was the first person he could joke with like this. My friends didn't like it when he said things like that and found it cruel; what they didn't understand was that at the end of the day the one who would live in limbo would be me, and taking it so seriou

"Just because I tell you to kill yourself doesn't mean you should do it! Are you dumb?!" At that moment I noticed something. I'm actually an asshole.