youre so ugly jokes

(18+ Explicit Content) Buy me.” My voice rings clear through the room. "Buy me and I will serve you until my purpose is through. Buy me and save me from death.” Dante merely laughs at me, "Why should I save you? I'm no hero, girl. You've stepped into a 's den and you're committing yourself to me.” I don't budge, fighting through the urge to cower before him. “I'll give you one chance to walk away, Atwood girl. If you don't, you will be mine and no one can save you from me.” But that’s exactly what I need. Not a hero, but a monster who could tear the world down and bring my sister back to me. I would sacrifice anything for her, including my freedom. Jean Atwood was at the top of the world. A perfect life for the perfect daughter of the esteemed and powerful Atwood family. But one mistake turned her life upside down and brought her family's name to the ground. Drowned in debt after her parents' deaths, Jean must find a way to free herself and her beloved younger sister from slavery.

Bai Aoxue, the best mercenary in the 21st century, is accidentally sent back to the Chengxi Dynasty in Great Continent due to an explosion in her mission, and trapped in the first daughter of Prime Minister. After her rebirth, she is set up by her father to marry the 5th prince Jun Yeyan who wears a mask all day long.In the face of bloodthirsty enemies, discord between brothers, collusion among courtiers and invasion of enemy state, can Bai and Jun resolve the crises? What will happen to their political marriage? How will the fierce battle for the throne end?With many twists and turns, the book brings you to experience palace revolution, love and hatred thousands of years ago.

"You are not my mate," he tells me firmly, pushing me against the wall and holding my wrists over my head to stop me from struggling. "You're just an impostor, a liar!" A smirk appears on my lips. "Me? An impostor and a liar?" I lean forward, making sure that our lips are only inches apart. "I can prove it. Let me go and I'll show you who I am." He swallows hard, his gaze wandering from my eyes down to my lips, going farther down with renewed purpose. . . . * * * Meredith Lane is the most beautiful girl in the kingdom of Raven Solstice. With her angelic features, she could have been blessed by the gods themselves. But there's one catch. She's a mere human in the world of Lycans, and the daughter of a Duke's lowly maid. Inhibited by her status and forever hidden from the public, Meredith decides to break some rules and explore what the world has to offer. And it just so happened the universe granted her the attention of a Lycan Heir, Zeus Antonov. But what if someone is just out there lurking, waiting for the right chance to take Meredith's beauty, along with her royal mate?

The line between Infatuation and Obsession is called Danger. Wunmi decided to accept the job her friend is offering her as she had to help her brother with his school fees. What happens when her new boss is the same guy from her high school? The same guy who broke her heart once? ***** Wunmi is not your typical beautiful Nigerian girl. She's sometimes bold, sometimes reserved. Starting work while in final year of her university seemed to be all fun until she met with her new boss, who looked really familiar. She finally found out that he was the same guy who broke her heart before, but she couldn't still stop her self from falling. He breaks her heart again several times, but still she wants him. She herself wasn't stupid, but what can she do during this period of loving him unconditionally? Read it, It's really more than the description.

UNFINISHED MISSION He works for the law. She work against the law. He's the definition of a gentle man. She's hot and dangerous. His brains works like an Alien. She's just a perfect con artist. Women are like a distraction to him. She detest men. Call him Dennis brownstone. She's scarlet Roland Just one mission brought them both together. What is the mission and why was it unfinished?

Seumur hidup dia tak pernah berani bermimpi akan memiliki seseorang yang akan selalu ada di sampingnya. Bukan lagi rahasia jika orang-orang mengacuhkannya, bahkan menganggap kehadirannya di dunia ini tak lebih dari sekedar sampah. Ya, sampah yang hanya akan membuat orang mencebik dan memandang rendah karena dia tak memiliki paras yang elok.Berbeda dengan pemuda itu. Pemuda yang tampan, kaya dan sukses. Jenis manusia yang kehadirannya tak bisa diabaikan begitu saja. Tapi bagaimana jika dua insan manusia ini bertemu dan JATUH CINTA?Apa menurut kalian ini mungkin, atau ini hanya dongeng pengantar tidur untuk si muka jelek?

**PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS BOOK IS CURRENTLY BEING EDITED AND REVISED*** Dragged to a ball where the country's most eligible bachelor is rumoured to be choosing a wife, Elizabeth wanted to be anywhere but here. Knowing her mother was counting on being tied to the Dereon's, the country's most powerful family, she decides to put her best foot forward. But with no one even knowing how August Dereon looks, how will the night go? August Rain is filled with a roller coaster of emotions and storylines. From betrayals to murder and pregnancy - and a mafia subplot, get your fill of Dragonfly and Mr Dereon in this sweet romance novel. *Book 1 of The Mafia Trinity Series of Novels*

Party-goer si Karisma. Isang gabi nang may magtangkang masama sa kanya ay iniligtas siya ng isang lalaki na nandoon, si Tobias Ortega. Nang malaman ng kanyang ina ang nangyari ay inutusan siya nitong pilitin ang binata na pumayag para maging personal bodyguard niya, kung hindi ay hindi na siya papayagan pang dumalo sa mga parties. Ngunit ayaw ni Tobias, kaya’t nagpasya si Karisma na pilitin ito at ligawan. Mapapapayag niya kaya ito?

Muntik ng mamatay ang CEO ng Ziff Corporation na si Seven Ziff dahil sa isang ambush kung hindi lang dahil sa pagkakaligtas sa kaniya ng mag-asawang napadaan sa pinangyarihan ng krimen. Subalit namatay din ang mag-asawa dahil sa pagtulong sa kaniya. Hindi nagtagumpay ang mga taong nais pumatay sa kaniya at nagpasya ang kaniyang lolo na dating chairman ng Ziff Corporation na manatili muna siya sa mansiyon at pansamantalang iwan muna ang pagiging CEO habang inaalam pa kung sino ang nais magpapatay sa kaniya. Habang nasa mansiyon ay nag-utos naman si Seven ng tao upang hanapin ang anak ng mag-asawang tumulong sa kaniya. Nais niya itong bigyan ng gantimpala ngunit nagulat siya nang malamang nalalagay din pala sa panganib ang anak ng mag-asawa sa hindi niya malamang dahilan. Dahil doon, gumawa siya ng paraan upang mapunta sa poder niya ang babae sa pamamagitan ng pagiging isang katulong. Hindi niya maaaring ipaalam sa babae ang tunay na dahilan para na rin sa kaligtasan nito at kailangan niyang alamin nang paunti-unti kung bakit pati ito ay ipinapapatay din ng mga taong gustong pumatay sa kaniya. Si Filippa, may malaking bukol sa mukha na siyang naging hadlang upang kakitaan siya ng ganda ay magsisilbing katulong sa mansiyon ng mga Ziff at walang kaalam-alam kung bakit nasa panganib ang buhay niya at kung ano ang tunay na kailangan ng guwapong bilyonaryong si Seven sa kaniya...

"You may look like her, but you're not her! Somewhere in this face, I will find my ugly fat princess!" He kissed her hungrily. Slap! "What are you doing?" asked Ruby. "Taking what's mine, Ruby Scarlett!" shouted Eric. "Let go. Struggling, she tried to pull herself away from his grasp. Instead, he embraced her tighter into his arms. He roughly pinched her beautiful face and traced her red lips with his rough hand. His eyes looked at her with longing. Tilting her chin closer to his lips he said, "You're my fiancée, you owe me for everything you put me through!" Unable to hold onto his hunger, Eric grabbed her by the hair and kissed her, shoving his tongue into her mouth. "Mmmph," grunted Ruby. "You're mine!" panted Eric. Ruby stared at him with a startled expression. This man hated her, despised her, loathe her. He broke and bent her in every possible way to annul their engagement. Rather than marrying her he went to war. He did it all so he can be his childhood sweetheart Samantha Wild. So, why is he doing this to her?