Deer Blind Dad Jokes Novels & Stories

I instinctively shifted to the side to hide the damp patch on my blouse before looking up at him. "What do you mean?" I asked. My eyes flicked past him toward the trampolines. The sight of Julian and Lydia playing there gave me the courage to speak up. The man chuckled. "I'm Finneas Zurick, Zachary's dad. We met at the kindergarten parent meeting," he began. "I've been thinking about you ever since then. I've been wondering when we'd finally get a chance to talk." His words grew more improper by the second. A faint blush spread across my cheeks as I studied him.

I pouted, contemplating this before whispering, “He's insatiable, and we aren't even close to his rut season! What would happen if he had one? He will break my waist, for sure!” Last night was worse. Dad went out to drink with friends and Jay thought that was his opportunity to cripple me. “Didn't you notice I limped to school?!” I still do. Though the ache was now gone, there was just this slight throbbing I felt whenever I walked. Debra threw her head back and laughed, the sound grating on my nerves. Glaring, I folded my arms, pissed that she thought my predicament was hilarious. I couldn't even tell what was funny about getting almost killed by Jay's cock.

If you lose sight of your initial objectives, then I will withdraw the sponsorship at any time. Daryl nodded in understanding. However, I could catch a flash of disappointment in his eyes. I went silent for a bit. Then, I added, "However, you can still call me your dad in public if you need to." His eyes lit up with a bright smile at once. His smile stunned me. I found it so ironic that Tammy, my own daughter, didn't care about me as her dad, and yet, a stranger's kid was simply ecstatic to be allowed to call me his dad.

"You don’t get my jokes?" "I never get your jokes dad even mom." Dad immediately face mom. "You don’t get my jokes honey?" "No! I do well most of the time." She smile sheepishly. "Tyler, my jokes aren’t that bad right?" I glanced at Tyler and saw him shaking his head. "No, of course not. I find it funny." "See… even Tyler like it." I rolled my eyes. "He’s a liar." I muttered lowly. Dad raised his eyebrow to me. "What’s that?"

“You don’t like cranberry sauce?” “No. It’s disgusting.” “All right, this confirms it. There must have been a mix-up in the hospital because you are definitely not my daughter.” Raven rolled her eyes. “Keep trying, Dad. Maybe one day you’ll come up with a joke that’s funny.” “People at work like my jokes.” I grinned. “You pay the people at work.” “Lanie likes my jokes.” “Yeah, I’m not going there.” She put a big forkful of food in her mouth and chewed away.

Jan Lee widened his eyes and blinked fast while turning his face to his mother. Then his mother and father laugh at him. “I think you need to go back to your cave. You have lost lots of energy while thinking and talking to us,” said the father making fun with him. “Hah ha! Really, truly. I just realized something and think someone,” Jan responded and take a sip of his coffee. “Realize what? And who?” asked the mother. “No! It is just me. I cannot tell it now,” he looks down while shaking his head and then turn his face to his parents.

My sister always got away with everything, so I naturally became Dad's favorite guinea pig to make an example of. When we were little, my sister refused to eat vegetables. He threw me into the bathroom, locked me in for five days without food, and starved me until I vomited blood. My sister was so terrified that she never dared to be a picky eater again. When we got older, she became obsessed with video games. Dad tied me to the computer and ordered me to play nonstop for thirty hours until my eyes bled. My sister swore she would never touch a computer again, and only then did he stop. Later, once puberty hit, my sister refused to wear thermal underwear. When Dad found out, he threw me

He had been staring at me with a strange expression the entire time. He instantly stiffened and flinched, like a cat caught by its master for knocking something off a shelf. Well, well. So, dear and loyal Draven really did do something wrong. “Did he—heaven forbid—forget to water a plant? Or perhaps he accidentally ate the last of the biscuits when no one was looking?” Draven joked, laughing at his own comment as if it were the funniest thing in the world. I sighed and shook my head. Out of every wolf the goddess could’ve paired me with, she chose to pair me with a clown.

When my joke lands she tilts her head back to laugh, shaking her head as she looks at me. "You're ridiculous." She says. "You're smiling." I respond. She gives me that warm look again and I wonder what's going through her mind at this moment. "You got any other ones?" She asks and I wrack my brain for any other dad jokes. "Um... The circus lion ate the clown but didn't finish." I say. "Why?" She asks. "Because he tasted funny." I respond and Harper chuckles again. "More." She teases, but I just shrug.

He looked like a man who had much to little sleep. “Pompous, big headed, arrogant, ignorant excuse for a Lycan.” Dad muttered quietly, taking a deep drink of the amber colored liquid. I couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped my lips, which quickly turned to full blown laughter. Dad was usually the one able to keep his emotions under lock and key. Mom was always the exuberant one, wearing her heart and emotion’s on her sleeve. “I see you and Bryton Duboi are great friends.” I teased, sitting down in one of the leather chairs.