Funny Christian Jokes Novels & Stories

Christian also adopted an aggressive tone. Jessica pursed her lips in dissatisfaction and said, "I'm sorry, but I don't want to see you." Christian paused for short while before asking, "Why?" Jessica blinked and said, "Maybe I ate too many pork ribs at noon. I feel nauseous when I see anything reminding me of a pig." "What?" This sentence was beyond Christian's comprehension. "Haven’t you ever heard of it? Men are all unfaithful pigs!" After speaking, Jessica hung up the phone decisively.

"You didn't have to, I could have killed a bunny or two." Christian made a face, "the thought of you killing a poor defenceless animal, is sickening." "The thought of eating cooked food is sickening." "Maddening." Christian said under his breath. "I heard that. I guess this means no more garlic bread for me." "Good, cause your breath was fire after eating them." Christian teased, waving a hand before his nose. "That's not nice." He gave Jessie a playful bite, and their usual banter started.

I had to do this. Christian looked at me in disbelief. As if the sky falls on his head. "What nonsense are you talking about? What do you think you are saying? I'm not here to joke around." His voice shook with anger. And I can see his eyes turn red. "Do you think I'm in the mood to joke with you? Even if you think so, let me tell you I'm not stupid as your cousin Liam. He's the most idiotic person I have ever met in my life." I rolled my eyes.

I watched on at her not getting why my predicament was funny to her, she tried minimizing her laughter with her palms while still staring funnily at me. "You, Lovelyn, in love with Richard? You must be joking right?" She asked with an amused face. "I'm not joking and that is why I'm telling you because it's not right at all, I mean I'm a Christian and a believer, I'm not supposed to have such ungodly feelings for him atleast not for someone like him" I said as Cherry maintained a serious face.

Alex said. “What?” I turned my head towards Christian, looking at him shockingly. Christian looked at me and then at Alex. They both started laughing loudly. It didn't take me long to understand they were pranking me. “You freaking idiots” I hit on Christian's arm and turned my face in another direction. “Please don't get angry” Christian muttered, showing me his mesmerising smile. I shook my head and then laughed at my foolishness to even believe in Alex. “So what's the plan?” Alex asked after a while.

Jude tries to touch his face, but Christian posted his hand away and stopped him from taking another step forward "What the fuck are you doing? How dare you stage such a disturbance at my party," The voice Christian used would show that he was so angry that he was Working up to act on his anger. However, Jude takes a step back, I saw him do that and all of a sudden, he started to laugh. He giggled to a point, I couldn't hold back my question.. "What's funny!!" I asked him in anger, as he turn Back his head and asked me. "Do you not know?" He squirmed his eyes at me, and took it back to Christian..

Sal shouted, scooting across the floor. "Worm?" Elysium perked up, his birdy nature showing. "Bite me and I'll cook you into a chicken," Sal growled. Distracted, I laughed. Ally urged them to keep me laughing. "Good, I'm doing everyone a favor by making her laugh." He continued being silly and making jokes. "Hey, why can't Jesus eat M&M's?" Everyone looked around, very confused. "They'd fall through the holes in his hands." He looked around, only me laughing. "What's the difference between death and taxes?" Still more confusion as to why he was acting this way. "Both are inevitable but at least death doesn't get worse."

“Yeah, are you sure you’re okay? You don’t have some silver up your ass as well right?- “Ah ah” I faked a laugh. “Was that supposed to be funny- “Who knows, we can’t say for sure, since your ass ain’t out, so maybe…you know, just wondering” She chuckled while Christian ignore us and walked around the desk to take a sit on the swivel pulled up against it. “You sound like a pervert looking for an excuse to look at someone’s butt” I replied and she laughed. “Oh please, the only butt I wanna be staring at is Chris’

He steps towards me in the garden as I gazed into the flowerbeds, his gray eyes locked on me with that same unreadable mysterious expression. I step back instantly, lifting my hand as a warning. My disgust and disdain were etched on my face. "Don't come close," I say harshly. "If you touch me, your hands will dry up like King Jeroboam's hand in the Bible." Raymond stops in his tracks. He laughs. 5 seconds had passed, and he was still chortling, holding his stomach. What was so funny? He stops laughing. "I didn't take you for a Christian."

Christian furrowed his brows at my comeback. "Did you just compare me with that murderer ?" Christian yelled probably getting the attention of passerbys. "You're not a murderer ?" I questioned then realized Christian hasn't actually murdered a soul according to my knowledge. He's tortured people and probably made people opt for suicide but he hasn't once killed them, he finds that boring or too much work.