Funny Christian Jokes Novels & Stories

“Ow, ow, ow!” “The only punk I see here is you,” Christian stated. “Now how about you at least act like you have some common sense in you, and get lost.” At that, he directed Julio to the door and harshly kicked him out of the cafe. Growing more enraged after the humiliation, Julio got back on his feet and glared at him. “Don’t think this is over, punk!” With that warning, he took his leave. Christian narrowed his eyes in suspicion as he left. He already felt something was funny about that human the second he came into the cafe. The stench he had all over him. And now that he has left with that attitude…

and because of him. Maybe it was his fault she hadn’t been around Sawyer. And that .. made him feel like shit. Christian came around the corner then dressed in overalls and a straw hat. Quinn couldn’t help it. He busted out laughing. Ah hell. What was happening here… Quinn was not a laugher. And here he was…. Guffawing. Loud… uninhibited cackling. He laughed so hard … in fact … that both Christian and Sawyer started laughing too. Then Dany got tickled. Apparently Quinn laughing was in itself funny.

“You have called me stupid on multiple occasions, told me I lack brain cells and what else.” “It was all a joke!” Christian defended his actions, but maybe if he never made those jokes in the first place, we wouldn’t have been here. “And I’ve never laughed, not once,” I told him. “Jokes are supposed to be funny.”

"I couldn't keep lying to him, not after what he said. He asked me to call him Grandpa... and I just couldn't. I told him everything." Christian nodded slowly, half his face still cloaked in moonlight. "What did he say?" A small, disbelieving smile tugged at my lips. "He laughed. Like, actually laughed. Out loud. Then he said, and I quote, 'I'm eighty-three, not eight.'" Christian blinked, and then—to my surprise—laughed too. A real laugh. Deep and unrestrained, the kind that slipped past all his careful composure. "We were completely played, weren't we?" He ran a hand through his hair, still smiling. "That old fox."

She then pecked a kiss on his forehead, making him smile again. Xandar then mind-linked Christian, ‘Fine. I’m jealous of the five-year-old. Who does he think he is?! And how is he going to protect her? Roll on the battleground and trip the rogues over?’ Christian burst into laughter, garnering everyone’s attention. Lucianne’s voice turned back into the way she normally spoke to him, “Christian, what’s the joke?” He lifted up a finger, asking for a minute while he continued laughing at his cousin’s mind-link. When he was done, he said, “Apologies, my Queen. I uh…just thought of something funny and couldn’t help myself.”

He steps towards me in the garden as I gazed into the flowerbeds, his gray eyes locked on me with that same unreadable mysterious expression. I step back instantly, lifting my hand as a warning. My disgust and disdain were etched on my face. "Don't come close," I say harshly. "If you touch me, your hands will dry up like King Jeroboam's hand in the Bible." Raymond stops in his tracks. He laughs. 5 seconds had passed, and he was still chortling, holding his stomach. What was so funny? He stops laughing. "I didn't take you for a Christian."

Not completely, but enough that I found myself laughing at Christian’s dumb jokes again. He was telling Lydia about some ridiculous fight he and his brother had as kids, acting it out with so much exaggeration that Lydia had to set down her fork because she was laughing too hard to chew. “Christian, you are lying,” she said, tears in her eyes. “I swear, Grandma! He cried like a baby. Over a scratched toy car.” Lydia shook her head, chuckling. “You two nearly burned down the kitchen once, and you want me to believe he cried over a toy car?”

Hitting the dummies one last time harder than I expected, I sighed heavily and snorted at myself for acting like a man. “Well that wasn't very ladylike of you” a voice came from behind me. I jumped up in fright and turned around ready to fight the person can had managed to creep up on me when I least expected it. Finding out it was only Christian put me at ease and pissed me off at the same time. “Don't do that. You scared the crap out of me” I said annoyed at me. He just stood there chuckling and looking rather amused at my discomfort. “What's so bloody funny?” I said, getting really annoyed at him.

He wouldn't stop running after me and jumping on my back,I thought he was gay,gosh my back still hurts" Christian touched his back. "You're crazy,what do you mean your back still hurts? You never complain when I jump on your back" Royal said,touching Christian's back. "Hey don't touch me like that" Christian slap his hand off. "You still have such amazing back,I'm feeling tempted" Royal muttered. "You wanna die?" Christian frowned. "They are so funny,right?" Owen asked Ryan who have been quiet. Ryan let out a fake laughter and nodded. "I guess" He mumbled and sipped from his drink.

Christian was standing among his friends and their wives in the dining hall, and I walked up to him to give him the pills for his headache. One of his friends said, “Hey, Christian, when are we going to see a little Blackthorne running around? Man, even my dog breeds faster than your wife!” Christian didn’t defend me; he just took a sip from his drink and chuckled. “Some things are just bad investments, Lucas. You can’t force a broken machine to work.” The whole table laughed while I looked down at my feet, wishing the ground would swallow me. But then… there was that one night.