Funny Lotr Novels & Stories

“Yeah. Little good it does, I don’t know what the hell he’s talking about.” Haldir huffed as he mulled it over. “I’d wager that little voice in your head has an important message.” Ben looked in his hand at the knife and chuckled. “Yeah that figures, doesn’t it? He’s probably popping off the secret to life and the directions to Atlantis and I don’t speak a damn word of the language.” Thorin chuckled out behind Ben as he took aim again. Ben closed his eyes and took a deep breath then opened them and threw the blade. It sunk deep into the stump, then the hard piece of tree fell in two before him.

It's pathetic! He dropped that bomb and strutted off before I could fire back. I could hardly believe my ears that such boneheaded words came from the man I have loved for years. His so-called 'cozy winter promos' were just a table with free cups of cheap black coffee and some giveaway gloves out front. The coffee often went cold, untouched, and those gloves ended up in the street bin. However, Seth, of course, thought they were pure gold. Somehow, I was the one cashing in on Lily's ideas!

Both share and friendly laugh at one another. A knock on the door surfaces followed by a dense tone of voice. “Dinner, mess hall, five minutes.” The voice demands before the sound of their footsteps leave. Troy looks over at the door and manages to laugh a little. He takes his robe and slides it on to cover his firm and naked body. Lutas leers over to his friend in a questioning manner. “Now what the hell is so damn funny?” Troy grips the edges of his cloak and gives a small smile and looks over at him. “When I was casting the spell, I could feel my energy draining. It almost felt like I was going to die. Then you came into the room. Somehow it felt like I was regaining my energy.” The elf s

Following his words, Kirou equipped the war hammer, surprising the female dwarf. Just as the female dwarf was about to ask what he meant by that question, something jumped out towards her from behind. Before she could even scream, however, she was greeted to a sight reminiscent of old school cartoons. Even in such a serious situation, the female dwarf player found it so funny that she laughed out, stunning the other members of the group slightly and prompting them to look, only to see another shadow wolf being sent away after being hit over the head with a comically large hammer. What made the situation even funnier was what came out of Kirou's mouth next. "FOOOUUURRR!!"

“We’re both nerds! Why is he funnier than me?!” Liu Feng slung an arm over Zen’s shoulders without missing a beat. “He’s cute. You’re not. The Gorski technology might have saved your life, but maybe you need to improve it if you want to alter your DNA to be funnier.” Jaw falling open, Damian stopped in disbelief as the others laughed at the Seer’s joke and walked away. Ignoring the Death Princess’ lack of emotions, everyone else laughed at the Seer’s insult. That was twice now that someone else laughed at an insult directed at him. Unwilling to become the joke, Damian quickly caught up and begged for another chance to tell another joke, only to see upturned lips as they declined him any rede

Lorien felt like it was hilarious, he looked at Rudy and said, "You're just second-rate trash that only knows how to brag, and he's just an idiot who doesn't think before he acts. No wonder you're friends, you both are an amazing pairing!" After he said that, the warriors from Golden Continent all laughed uproariously. They felt like Fane's actions were just crazy. They looked at Fane like they were looking at an idiot. Hearing all of that, Rudy was not angry at all.

He looked calm as though he was talking about a trivial matter. "Well..." The dozen or so Dark Iron Wolf Dark Races were all stunned. "Haha!" Next, the dozen or so Dark Iron Wolf Dark Races let out loud laughter. "Human, do you know? This is the funniest joke I've ever heard in my life!" An Iron Wolf laughed with tears in his eyes. He held onto his stomach as he laughed towards Lucas.

he conceded, "but you play a part; I'm sure of it. I can feel it; like an itch just below my skin." "Oh, I hate those itches," I groaned. "You scratch and scratch and nothing helps." I glanced over and saw him giving me an exasperated look. "I know you're not being literal. I was just trying for some levity." "Next time you should try harder." He grimaced. "Or not at all." "Wonderful." I rolled my eyes. "Thanks for the tip, Legolas." "Do not make Lord of the Rings jokes with me," he said seriously. "We Fey, hate that."

She patted it softly and said in a soft tone "Good. You keep your head up Sunshine." This little girl is getting on my nerves. This is ridiculous. If she called me ugly, I wonder what she would call Mark. After all...I am better looking then him. I would give her some names like...Troll or Chewbacca. No wait....Sméagol! Yeah!!! Thats way better! That ugly thing from The lord of the rings fits Mark perfectly. I chuckled at the thought. "Why are you laughing?" said Dina, snapping me out of my thoughts.

The Dwarves and Fauns from all over the forest of Tomer finally arrived, and they outnumbered the inhabitants of the city of Briston, certainly far more than Edmund's army. Even though they numbered in the thousands they didn't seem intimidating at all. The Dwarves wore friendly smiles despite wielding terrible weapons, they even replied as Lillian waved. The sight made Wiggy smile with emotion and proud to see the many colonies he had, the young man turned to his friends. "And humans say the existence of the Falsies is just a myth!" he shouted aloud, to the cheers of all his people. ***