Jealousy Novels & Stories

Dahil hindi ko alam kung sino ang makakasalubong niya doon. Mga dating kaklase. Mga lalaking maaaring dati niyang gusto. O mga lalaking maaaring gusto siyang kunin mula sa akin ngayon. My fists clenched by instinct. I hated this feeling. Jealousy. It was loud. Raw. Direct. And god, it scared the hell out of me. Because I don’t get jealous. I don’t get possessive. I don’t get affected. Hindi ako ganito.

namumungay ang kanyang maamong mga mata habang sinasabi iyon na may kaba. "Anong ibig mong sabihin?" "I'm jealous, Brenda." He finally blurted. Hindi ako makapaniwala sa sinabi niya at sa tingin ko tumalon yata ang puso ko sa tuwa. His jealous? "I'm jealous every time you're with your guy friends. I don't know if I have the right to get jealous, pero hindi ko mapigilan. This is the first time that I got so possessive with someone and I'm sorry if I'm scaring you." Diretso niyang giit.

Ang pinaka-ayaw niya sa lahat ay iyong sasampalin siya and then it was too late to realize that he just kissed Jamila out of nowhere. He was carried away in his anger, to the point he ignored Jamila being hurt by him. He knew he hurt her physically and emotionally by saying stupid things to her. He didn’t mean to insult and accuse but his anger made him do things like that. He was really jealous and that was the reason he really couldn’t accept it. Hindi niya matanggap sa sarili niya na selos ang kanyang nararamdaman. Wait- Did he think that he was jealous? The answer was yes! He was jealous, there was no denying it anymore. Ayaw niyang lumapit ang Garett na iyon kay Jamila.

Ang tanging alam niya, handa siyang gawin ang lahat para tuluyang mailayo si Dirus mula sa anino ng kahapon. “Hindi ako nagseselos, ha,” depensa niya. “Sadyang nakakataas lang ng presyon ang kalandian ng ex mo.” Selos ba ang tawag doon—ang bigla kang naiirita tuwing nababanggit ang pangalan ng dating minahal ng lalaking kasama mo? Is it jealousy when she keeps telling herself that she’s better than that woman? Selos ba kung sumisikip ang dibdib mo sa ideyang may nauna nang minahal ang lalaking ito, at higit pa roon—may batang minsan nang nabuo sa pagitan nila?

“You don’t have to worry about who am I, Amber. Kung ano man ang nangyari sa nakaraan, wala na ‘yon.” “Let’s go back to your problem,” he said. “So, it’s about jealousy, huh?” he asks. I nodded while putting. “You know what? Being jealous is normal. Specially if you have the right to feel that way. And if you love that person, you’ll be afraid that he might be stolen by other girls.” May karapatan nga ba ako? Kahit na alam ko’ng hindi naman ako ang totoo’ng babae na mahal niya?

Anong ginagawa ko? "It's okay if you cannot admit it to yourself that you are jealous, Aliyah. I mean kahit sino naman, hindi ba? Basta ang akin lang, bago ka magselos, siguraduhin mong ang Saavedra'ng nagmamay ari sa iyo ay ako at hindi ang ama ko. I'm possessive, Aliyah. What's mine is mine, and I don't fucking share."

Hindi ko maintindihan ang nararamdaman ko. Nagtuluan muli ang mga luha ko at hindi na napigilang umiyak ng malakas. Napasinghal ako pero napabuntong hininga rin kalaunan. That feeling must be so confusing for a six-year-old. At that age, I began to feel jealous. Not just a simple jealousy but the kind of jealousy that had an impact on me. That jealousy is still here to this day. And I think I can’t get rid of it.

Hindi ako sumagot, bagkus ay pinindot ang end button. Ibinalik ko ang cellphone ni Rajiv sa side table at muli syang tinitigan. Parang tinutusok ng ng milyun-milyong karayom ang puso ko ngayon habang nakatitig at inaalala ang sinabi nung Julyanna. For the first time in my life, I felt hurt and I think I know the answer to my self-question earlier. I am admitting it now. This isn't jusf because I am physically attracted to Rajiv. It is because I really like him a lot. Ans this heart-shattering feelings right now... is what they called... JEALOUSY!

Parehong walang umimik sa aming dalawa hanggang sa narinig ko ang malutong niyang pagtawa. "A, kaya pala. Nagselos ang pinsan ko." "Hindi, 'no!" kaila ko. "Wala akong karapatan." Naramdaman ko ang malakas niyang pagtapik sa balikat ko. "Hindi ka p'wedeng magselos kasi wala kang karapatan? Ganyan mag-rason ang mga mababaw ang utak. Ang pagseselos wala 'yan sa karapatan, kasi may puso ka rin naman kaya kusa iyang nararamdaman. When you are jealous then so be it. Jealousy has no limitation, it's unstoppable. Saka lang pumapasok ang salitang 'karapatan' kapag nandadamay ka na ng ibang tao dahil diyan sa nararamdaman mo. May pakiramdam ka naman kaya may karapatan k