Kickass Humor Novels & Stories

But she was already reading it out. 2Tall2Bottom: U into anonymous gloryholes? I host (⁠•⁠‿⁠•⁠) I peeked through my fingers. "Why are they all talking like GTA strip club NPCs?!" She was crying with laughter. "Mate, this is normal for hookup sites. Here see, this one straight up sent, Wyd with a dick pic attached. At least he's got humor. “Let me put my dick in dat booty." She snickered at the play of words of my username.

"I'd pay really well for you to satisfy my foot fetish." "For five dollars I'll put my foot up your ass." "Painful and drastically overpriced." "You like the pain." "Not in my ass." They both laughed, and a short time later they left the suite to interrupt Krispin during his favorite past time.

Kyle shoved his hands into his pockets and let out a small scoff. Then, he laughed. But it wasn’t a normal laugh, it was twisted, like he couldn’t believe we were all standing here feeding him some sick joke. It was the kind of laugh you let out when the ground underneath you starts to crack, and you’d rather laugh than fall through it. I stepped forward. I wasn’t even sure why, maybe because that look in his eyes? It wasn’t just disbelief. It was fear. The kind you don’t admit out loud.

There, take that you hottie, hot guy! His grin leaves me breathless but then he opens his mouth, and nonsense spills out like word vomit. “Yeah, I have a plethora of words in my arsenal… there’s fuck, fucker, fucked, dickhead, shit, bullshit, ass, asshat…” He continues to list more cuss words. Each curse word becomes more ridiculous than the last. I gaped at him wide-eyed and suddenly busted out laughing. “You’re just a dork, you know that?” I can’t help but smile at him. This scary dude does have a sense of humor.

I said – and then blushed furiously as he burst into laughter. “Oh my God, the truth comes out!” he howled. “Shut up!” I snapped. “Want to go back to talking about asses?” he asked as he wiped a tear from the corner of his eye. I decided to go on the offensive. “What’s your fascination with men’s asses?” I asked with an evil leer. He grinned and shrugged. “I’m completely secure in my ass-omeness.” “Your what?” “Like awesomeness, but with an ass. Ass-omeness.”

I taunted him. "Nothing is enough," he huffed. "Should I break your skull or chop off your finger? And then, you can imagine the 'oh ho ho ho' tone in your mind in the background," I jokingly threatened him. (Oh ho ho ho is a song that's widely used as a meme for depicting sad or fucked up situations in India) "What the fuck? I am upset and crying over here and you're imagining about a meme in such a serious situation?" He complained.

Someone among the surrounded trainee repeated. "Oh, isn't it the Toadman?" The second friend of Kiko added. "Toadman?" And another person around repeated. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! An earth-shattering laugh and ridicule had been started once again. "Hey, hey, isn't he the bumpkin man?" Said some random girl. "You mean the mountain man?" Followed by someone. "Shameless man!" "Oh, right! It was him! The mentally ill man." The ridicule was like a chain message, hard to stop once started.

“All that’s left is to kiss you and you will become my slave forever” “That’s never gonna happen. Let me tell you how this is gonna end. I will kick your ass then you tell me where to find my father and then I kill him” “It's good to see you have a good sense of humor unlike Steve” “I have more than that” We’ll see about that”

‘‘We can’t intervene on arguments between siblings, the demon and his siter,’’ someone commented before laughter followed. I looked up and literally roared looking for the person, I was going to kill someone or something today, I swear, I had had enough. As soon as I was done roaring, more chorus and laugher followed as people began thumping the locker and singing fatdevil again. I looked at the seat, one egg has a chick inside and I had obviously crushed it to death. I was a killer. A psychotic killer without any remorse. The other egg was a rotten one, giving that awful rotten smell away.

He just laughed at me and walked out but not befire crashing his lips to mine it was a passionate yet quick kiss. After my relaxing shower I got changed and opened the door to find Kyle falling on the floor because he was leaning on the door. I just laughed at him but I tried to say sorry but I came out like a freaking cackle. "You think this is so funny?" He asked looking a bit annoyed but still amused, I just nodded because I couldn't find any words. Suddenly I was lifted up over his shoulder and we were walking to the rest of the gang. "Kyle, I dont know what your middle name is, Black. Put me down right now!" He just chuckled at me struggles to get out of his grip. "Nah, I love the view