Miserable Funny Quotes Novels & Stories

“All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. That's how far the world is from where I am. Just one bad day.” Never in my life did I believe there would be a day when a quote from a comic would relate so closely to me. But recently, I started feeling that the bad days in my life are far more than the good. I was so tired of fighting to keep my sanity. To fight to stay afloat of the sea of misery that was pulling me to its depths with every passing day. I didn’t think I had more strength to swim. I gave up.

I shook my head and went to sit across Audrey. She was laughing at the quotes on the wall. “These are hilarious,” she said, reading one aloud: ‘I don’t need you to brag about me, I just don’t want you to deny me in front of people. – FART!’ Her laughter burst out, filling the café. I just stared, completely captivated. Every laugh, every sparkle in her eyes, it was contagious. “Here’s another one!” she giggled. ‘What a life! Eggs every single day… eggs, eggs, eggs… Do you know who said that?’ Her eyes gleamed mischievously.

" You're sick and I may hate you but I'm a psychopath." " Correction, you are a psychopath and care doesn't look good on you." This little shit! My jaw tightened. " After the stupid stunt you pulled, you're not going anywhere till you fucking die." He chuckled. " Well that's not long anymore," How could he laugh? How could he make such stupid jokes about life? As much as I hated to admit it, I found his cheerfulness admirable. It was still stupid. But, admirable. His face calmed slightly as walked closer, freeing his hands from the confines of his pockets. " Do you miss her?"

Disgusting! [Perfect match. Trash meets trash!] [Props to the wife for getting out quickly. Let them ruin themselves.] [Those two scumbags won't have a happy ending!] I couldn't help but laugh when I read the comments.

The quote for this picture said: Don’t take life too seriously. You’re not getting out of it alive. From the passenger seat, Isobel burst out laughing. “Oh my God, that’s hilarious.” Holding her side, she rolled to face me. “Who is it a quote from?” Her eyes glittered with joy and I had to admit, it felt nice, knowing she realized I’d made sure to find out the answer to that question already. “Elbert Hubbard,” I said. “Or at least, it’s similar to one of his quotes.”

“I feel like right now you get me, with this I mean, and well misery loves company.” If this had been any other day, I probably would say no, but he was right. Misery loves company and I am feeling miserable. “You know what? Sure, why not. I got dressed up. I came here to forget about things for a while and that’s what I’m going to do.”

Marigold looked at Mr.Bax and said, “Are you happy now? You’ve taken everything from me.” Mr.Bax scoffed, saying, “Don’t be dramatic, you now have a better life. Nothing was taken from you, only given to you. You should be thanking me for taking you from your pitiful life and giving you a bigger and better life. A life you can now be proud of.” Marigold said, “You’re delusional and self centered. You’re a miserable and lonely old man.” Mr.Bax laughed and said, “You say miserable, I say rich and happy. Now that you have access to all these new riches you will soon understand that money is the best thing to have in this world.” She cried, “You’re sick, sick and disgusting. I would choose to be

I laugh out loud, cackling even. "Ah Ma. I'm proud of you. You even know your block button?" My aunt laughs some more with me. "I know my restrictions too. I'll just restrict you. If you like send me one million dms it will not deliver. Rubbish." I hold in my laughter and giggle hard instead. "Just tell them that he is a man that doesn't like loneliness. That's all." She stops laughing and makes me winded, remembering all my stress with Abdul.

Whoa, what a haughty tone! Jake snorted and said, “Hey, loser, are you serious? Five million? How can a loser like you come up with five million? How rich can you be if you came to Jumbo Bar for beer?” Upon hearing Philip’s remarks, Cindy and the others also sarcastically said, “Hmph, five million? You can't even order a bottle of champagne. How can you afford five million?” “That’s right! Four beggars are drinking beer here, yet they still have the guts to pretend.”

He wished for rain which would match his mood but the sky was an unbroken sea of blue save for the band of salmon pink which taunted him. "Point straight blank. My mom used to say I lacked a fundamental trait needed to function as a human being- common sense." Venus laughed her first real one it helped mitigate the building tension in, but only by a fraction. "I'm saying this now, not to give an excuse for all the atrocities I committed. But rather for you to have an answer when you ask yourself because you will-how dumb can this guy really be? The answer? Dumb, really dumb." Her laughter trailed off before dying completely.